Awesome Quotes

[I'm Only Dancing]

"Fighting fire with fire is moronic. Everyone knows you fight fire with water."
- the roommate

[Tim]

A portion of a National Public Radio (NPR) interview between the female broadcaster and US Marine Corps General Reinwald as he was preparing to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?
GENERAL: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting.
FI: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it?
GENERAL: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range.
FI: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?
GENERAL: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.
FI: But you're equipping them to become violent killers.
GENERAL: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute,
but you're not one, are you?

[Tim]

The only difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
-Friend of mine

[I'm Only Dancing]

Only two things I know are infinite, the universe and human stupidity. I doubt the former.
- Albert Einstein

[Yangfan]

"What information consumes is rather obvious: it consumes the attention of its recipients. Hence a wealth of information creates a poverty of attention, and a need to allocate that attention efficiently among the overabundance of information sources that might consume it."

--Nobel laureate economist Herbert Simon

[Tim]

I like that quote yangfan.

[Tim]

"When we want a civilian's opinion, we'll elect him president."
-Major Nash and the best EE teacher ever, coincidentally.

[nerullnecrophite]

Marylin Manson wears makeup and has a girl's name. How original.

-- Alice Cooper

[Tyler]

I have a few

From Shadow Hearts 2

Gepetto: Man she packs quite a wallop doesn't she?
Yuri: yeah...
Gepetto: damn I saw only stars too
Yuri: he he he
Gepetto: you saw something?
Yuri: paradise
Gepetto: dammit...I didnt see anything......

(after looking up Karin's new skirt )

later

Yuri: So old man is there anything you can do about this mistletoe?
Gepetto: Maybe if I learn more....
Yuri: ......what haveyou learned so far.
Gepetto: I think you're screwed.

[Yangfan]

Thanks Tim.

And now, I will inflict upon you all some doggy quotes:

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.
-Edward Abbet

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.
-Robert Benchley

What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog.
-Dwight D. Eisenhower

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.
-Samuel Butler

[Uso Tasuki]

“Time dulls all claws,” -- HJW

“Women!” --HJW

“Men!” --Uso Tasuki

“Don’t hold two pistols… you’ll just miss twice as much,” --Uso Tasuki

"Of course you should fight fire with fire... you should fight everything with fire!"

"when you live for others you live for yourself"

"Fighting for the right reason is itself a source of strength."

[Yangfan]

"God appeared to me in a dream... told me I'm hilarious."
- Scott Kurtz

All righty then...

[James]

Knowledge speaks, Wisdown listens.
-Jimmy Hendrix

[Phyrexus]

Actually, scientific testing has proven that knowing is only 15% of the battle. The vast majority is kicking ass, with around 5% being "looking cooler than everyone else."
- ...some guy from the Dumpshock forums

[Zakalwe]

Soldiers can win battles and generals get the medals
- Napoleon Bonaparte

The first advice I am going to give my successor is to watch the generals and to advoid feeling that just because they where military men their opimions on military matters gives a damn
- John F. Kennedy

The Americans are a funny lot; they drink whisky to keep them warm; then thet put ice in to make it cool; they put sugar in to make it sweet, and then they put a slice of lemon in to make it sour. Then they say 'here's to you' and drink it themselves
-B.N. Chakravarty

A Yankee is one who, if he gets his teeth set on a thing, all creation can't let him go
-R. W. Emerson

[Wes]

"It was funny, sweet, candid, all the things that a woman--no, a human--should be."

-Me, referring to this.

Edit: Randomly found this browsing a parenting site:

[Zakalwe]

"Those who will not follow are doomed to lead"

[Phyrexus]

"Don't call me on this head! This is an unlisted head!"
--implanted phones cause odd comments sometimes

[Rob]

"There is no teacher but the enemy. No one but the enemy will ever tell you what the enemy is going to do. No one but the enemy will ever teach you how to destroy and conquer. Only the enemy shows you where you are weak. Only the enemy tells you where he is strong. And the rules of the game are what you can do to him and what you can stop him from doing to you."

- Mazer Rackham, "Ender's Game" (Orson Scott Card)



"Individual human beings are all tools, that the
others use to help us all survive."

- Colonel Graff, "Ender's Game" (Orson Scott Card)

[Zakalwe]

Stand firm in your refusal to remain concious durin algebra. I real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra
- Fran Lebowitz

In large states public education will always be mediocre, for the same reason that in large kitchens the cooking is bad
- Friedrich Nietzsche

A professor is a man whose job it is to tell students how to solve the problems of life that he himself has tried to avoid by becoming a profesor