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Approved Submission Broadsword Light Cruiser

Alex Hart

FM of NDC
🎖️ Game Master
Submission Type: Ship
Submission URL: https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=faction:uso:broadsword_light_cruiser

Faction:
FM Approved Yet? (Yes/No; Who, When) Yes, by zack, telling me that I have approval for all future submissions
Faction requires art? (Yes/No) no

For Reviewers:
Contains Unapproved Sub-Articles? (Yes/No) no
Contains New art? (Yes/No) yes
Previously Submitted? (Yes/No; explain reason if rejected) no

Notes:
 
This suggestion has been implemented. Votes are no longer accepted.
I can only assume what Wes meant, I have the time, and it can't hurt to do a checklist, even if he wants to do one, as well. Wes, let me know if I've made an egregious error in doing this and I won't jump the gun next time.

This review is for: Broadsword Light Cruiser with URL: https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=faction:uso:broadsword_light_cruiser

The submitted article is/has…
[•] A very high level of overall quality
[•] A general topic sentence under the title header
[•] Artwork (Required for new species; Strongly recommended for vehicles and hand weapons)
[•] Needed and/or useful to the setting
[•] In the proper format/template
[See below] Proofread for spelling and grammar
[•] Easy to read and understand (not a lengthy mass of technobabble)
[•] Wikified (terms that could be a link should be a link)
[•] No red and/or broken links
[•] Reasonably scientifically plausible
[•] Reasonably neutral point of view

The submitted article is/does not…
[•] Overpowered (or cutting tech for a faction with little or no roleplay)
[•] Obtusely redundant
[•] Contain copy pasta descriptions of systems or interior compartments
[•] Unauthorized by faction managers or player-controlled corporation
[•] Contain references to IC events that have not occurred (SM must authorize retcons)
[•] Use second-person language (“you” or “your”) unless it is an instructional guide aimed at players.
[•] Use bombastic language (“virtually immune,” “nearly indestructible,” “insanely powerful,” “horrible effects”)
[See below] Use an unbalanced header/text ratio (many headers but sections are one-liners)
[•] Use major unapproved sub-articles that should be submitted separately
[•] Lacking Detail
[•] Images hosted on sites other than stararmy.com (Photobucket, Imageshack, etc are not allowed)

The article has…
[•] Speeds in compliance with the Starship Speed Standard, if applicable
[See below] Damage Capacity and Damage Ratings in compliance with the DR Guidelines
[•] The in-character year of creation/manufacture. (Should be current year. Future years not allowed).
[See Below] The Standard Product Nomenclature System, if applicable.

To the submitter: Is this a refit or overhaul of a previous article? If yes, provide a link and a list of changes.

I intend to finish this review by: 2/19/17 (Today)

Notes:
Use an unbalanced header/text ratio (many headers but sections are one-liners): You have some headers with no text below them. Ex: Inside the Ship and Ship Systems. Compartments are all one liners, but that isn't as bothersome as the history and background one liner.

Proofread for spelling and grammar: "The Broadsword has nodes located throughout the hull project a conformal set of shields all across the ship. By depowering some of these nodes shields can be lowered in a certain area to allow EVA or fighter craft to exit a hangar." Write that between hull and project. Add a comma between shields and can.

Damage Capacity and Damage Ratings in compliance with the DR Guidelines:
On weapons, write T11 instead of 11, etc

I have reviewed this submission in accordance with the Guide for Submission Reviewers.
 
Just waiting on Wes, now. If anything comes up in the meantime, I'll ping you.
 
I'd like there to be some text in the "Ship systems" section, which is currently empty. Fix that and I think it's ready for approval.

In general I'd like to see more "meat" (as in text descriptions) in the article but I won't hold it back for that.
 
Ametheliana is doing the approval. Stop poking me!
 
RPG-D RPGfix
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