LittleWasp
Well-Known Member
Hi, everyone.
Some (maybe all?) of you know that I've been struggling with severe depression for years, and it's always had a huge impact on my ability to motivate myself, enjoy my life and do the things I love doing (besides hugging you guys <3). I'm being treated, seeing a psychiatrist regularly, etc, so please don't worry about me. I'm in good hands. Unfortunately, my living situation is making recovery of any sort impossible at the moment: In fact, my motivation and energy has been going down the past couple of months. My RP presence on this site has decreased accordingly, and I just can't keep up with the two plots I am currently involved in. Reading up on other people's posts is too difficult for me to do, let alone writing posts of my own. It's not even physical tiredness... it's purely emotional. Difficult to describe.
Some people think little of depression because 'it's all in your mind'. Your mind is everything that is you, so when your mind has no energy and no will, your body has nothing to drive it. Depression can end up being a lot more than just feeling really sad all the time; it's constant mental stress accumulating until your mind can barely function. There used to be times when I'd be curled up in my bed, quite literally screaming in agony from the amount of emotional pain inside of me that I couldn't otherwise express. Now, I'm just really tired and apathetic, which is somewhat better, I guess? If a nuke went off in my neighbourhood, I'd just say 'oh cool' and roll over in my bed to snooze some more.
Mikki-Chan
This concerns @Alex Hart @Zack @Jack Pine @HarperMadi primarily. I'm currently playing the character of Mikali in plots involving you guys. I can't do it anymore, I'm afraid. I'm willing to turn Mikali over to you guys as an NPC in both plots, to whomever of you will take her. Alex and Jack are my picks, since both their characters own their individual instances of Mikali. Otherwise, I guess she can just suffer a blue screen of death.
Regarding the I'ee
I've wondered what I might do with the I'ee if I ever had to leave the site or go inactive for whatever reason. My first pick to take over the I'ee as a faction would be @Zack since I feel he has the best idea of how they work, and me and him have worked on I'ee stuff together. The I'ee have become almost entirely inactive now-a-days. As I said before, I have no energy or motivation. Even if people come to me with good ideas for them, I just can't muster the energy to take them up on it.
So, here's what I'm going to do: The I'ee will be 'soft-locked'. If you wanna play I'ee characters, you totally can. Come to me for help if you need it, because I'd love to help you. You can have I'ee NPCs turn up in your plots if you like too. However, anything involving the I'ee species as a whole and their home system of Ee'ee is off-limits: Effectively, I don't want plots that directly involve the I'ee faction in any capacity greater than a guest appearance or a couple of player characters tagging along, Sally and Yui style.
---
I'm not gonna leave the site as a whole, of course. I've said it before: I really love all of you, and I don't just say it to be nice or to make you smile. I really do appreciate all of the company you guys give me. SARP's been a really good place for me to make new friends and exercise my imagination when I had few other means left to me. I wish some of you appreciated each other as much as I do you. It really breaks my heart when I see you guys fight. I've said it before, but the people who fight never seem to listen to me: You're all welcome to hate each other as much as you like. It's a human emotion, after all. It's how you act upon that hatred that counts. I want you to act more upon your love instead.
I'll hang out here and on the Discord server too. I'll still be here to talk to you and hug you, and vice versa. ^w^ I just can't handle any roleplay right now, sadly.
I love all you guys,
-Waspy
P.S Stop fighting in the Discord setting design channel, for the love of God. You know who you are.
Some (maybe all?) of you know that I've been struggling with severe depression for years, and it's always had a huge impact on my ability to motivate myself, enjoy my life and do the things I love doing (besides hugging you guys <3). I'm being treated, seeing a psychiatrist regularly, etc, so please don't worry about me. I'm in good hands. Unfortunately, my living situation is making recovery of any sort impossible at the moment: In fact, my motivation and energy has been going down the past couple of months. My RP presence on this site has decreased accordingly, and I just can't keep up with the two plots I am currently involved in. Reading up on other people's posts is too difficult for me to do, let alone writing posts of my own. It's not even physical tiredness... it's purely emotional. Difficult to describe.
Some people think little of depression because 'it's all in your mind'. Your mind is everything that is you, so when your mind has no energy and no will, your body has nothing to drive it. Depression can end up being a lot more than just feeling really sad all the time; it's constant mental stress accumulating until your mind can barely function. There used to be times when I'd be curled up in my bed, quite literally screaming in agony from the amount of emotional pain inside of me that I couldn't otherwise express. Now, I'm just really tired and apathetic, which is somewhat better, I guess? If a nuke went off in my neighbourhood, I'd just say 'oh cool' and roll over in my bed to snooze some more.
Mikki-Chan
This concerns @Alex Hart @Zack @Jack Pine @HarperMadi primarily. I'm currently playing the character of Mikali in plots involving you guys. I can't do it anymore, I'm afraid. I'm willing to turn Mikali over to you guys as an NPC in both plots, to whomever of you will take her. Alex and Jack are my picks, since both their characters own their individual instances of Mikali. Otherwise, I guess she can just suffer a blue screen of death.
Regarding the I'ee
I've wondered what I might do with the I'ee if I ever had to leave the site or go inactive for whatever reason. My first pick to take over the I'ee as a faction would be @Zack since I feel he has the best idea of how they work, and me and him have worked on I'ee stuff together. The I'ee have become almost entirely inactive now-a-days. As I said before, I have no energy or motivation. Even if people come to me with good ideas for them, I just can't muster the energy to take them up on it.
So, here's what I'm going to do: The I'ee will be 'soft-locked'. If you wanna play I'ee characters, you totally can. Come to me for help if you need it, because I'd love to help you. You can have I'ee NPCs turn up in your plots if you like too. However, anything involving the I'ee species as a whole and their home system of Ee'ee is off-limits: Effectively, I don't want plots that directly involve the I'ee faction in any capacity greater than a guest appearance or a couple of player characters tagging along, Sally and Yui style.
---
I'm not gonna leave the site as a whole, of course. I've said it before: I really love all of you, and I don't just say it to be nice or to make you smile. I really do appreciate all of the company you guys give me. SARP's been a really good place for me to make new friends and exercise my imagination when I had few other means left to me. I wish some of you appreciated each other as much as I do you. It really breaks my heart when I see you guys fight. I've said it before, but the people who fight never seem to listen to me: You're all welcome to hate each other as much as you like. It's a human emotion, after all. It's how you act upon that hatred that counts. I want you to act more upon your love instead.
I'll hang out here and on the Discord server too. I'll still be here to talk to you and hug you, and vice versa. ^w^ I just can't handle any roleplay right now, sadly.
I love all you guys,
-Waspy
P.S Stop fighting in the Discord setting design channel, for the love of God. You know who you are.
