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Approved Character Lucifer Morningstar

i know I'm no submission mod but the submission caught my eye, generally speaking in SARP we are required to put a good amount of information into our characters to give other players a clear idea of what they are like and their background and appearance, what you have looks good but definitely needs expanding.

Also as someone who likes his wiki work I noticed you have a couple of broken links, mercenary being one and under a couple of the other areas you have left them blank, which is by no means a bad thing however the stock @@rank@@ and such have not been removed.

I think I'll tag @Wes and @Ametheliana to explain it better than me, they're probably better at this sort of thing ^^
 
Yes, you might want to link to things such as Fourth Elysian War and Elysian.

Tsubomi is an orphan city and a more likely way for Lucifer to have been adopted.

Do not write in first person, but third person. This means you should write without saying, "I" and, "you" but speaking about Lucifer as if you are an observer.

Mercenary is also not a star army occupation.

Here is a code for a link. Slap this in the wiki:
Code: 
[[species:elysian]]
 
I really, really, really hate to be That Guy™, but the bio still needs some work @The atheist devil.
  • Is it safe to assume that Lucifer is a Caelisolan?
  • Even if Lucifer murdered his parents at the age of 8, Elysian Soul Transfer technology would’ve simply “respawned” them a short while later at the nearest medical facility.
  • An eight-year-old wouldn’t have been able to evade the authorities for more then a week or so - not at such a young age - and once caught, he would’ve been sentenced, convicted, and confined to a mental health institution for the remainder of his life.
  • Even if he was somehow able to evade the authorities at first, sooner or later he would’ve been picked up and placed in a state-run orphanage.
Again, I apologize if it seems like I’m “holding things up,” as that’s not my intention at all - rather, I’m just trying to point out the elements of Lucifer that conflict with pre-existing canon.

Mind starting a DM with me? My Discord ID is: FrostJäger#4293
 
Where was this character born? I think that would be a good starting point for re-evaluating what can be done. Also, I think if he hitched a ride out of wherever he was and fled to indie space, that would help his ability to be a true orphan.
 
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