Commissar Farzi
🎖️ Game Master
- Submission Faction(s)
- Yamatai (except Elysia)
- Nepleslia
- Submission Terms
- I agree
The infamaous "Neko-Tine" lozenges, for the discerning Nepleslian Exchange Officer.
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Rejected Submission "Catnip" Nicotine Lozenges
- Thread starter Commissar Farzi
- Start date
- Status
RaWolfe
Retired Staff
Commissar Farzi
🎖️ Game Master
It actually started off as a conversation about chewing tobacco, and after then it kinda...snowballed.
Commissar Farzi
🎖️ Game Master
Go for it.
Whisper
Retired Staff
Hey Farzi!
I love the submission and especially love that it's manufactured by NAM of all things.
Couple things about the article:
- When you're making an article, the first mention of anything that's specific to the setting (like the Lorath, Neppy's Burger, etc) should be a link to that article. I took care of this for you, but just for future reference. I also cleaned up a few minor grammar issues. You can see my changes here - if I messed up your intention, feel free to change it as needed.
- When you submit, there's a section for 'Submission Template' - I believe you used the 'Drug' template for this one. Next time please include the link, makes it easier on us reviewers.
- In the extras, you mention "famous neko head" and some other things - it took me a moment to realize what you meant. Maybe expand on that section just a bit so that people understand what the head is for, where it's at, etc, and not that their dispenser comes with an actual decapitated head
Other than those couple of points, this looks good! Once @Charmaylarg Dufrain or @The KrimsonWulf gives this their approval and you've resolved that last point, I'll move on to the Approval process.
I love the submission and especially love that it's manufactured by NAM of all things.
Couple things about the article:
- When you're making an article, the first mention of anything that's specific to the setting (like the Lorath, Neppy's Burger, etc) should be a link to that article. I took care of this for you, but just for future reference. I also cleaned up a few minor grammar issues. You can see my changes here - if I messed up your intention, feel free to change it as needed.
- When you submit, there's a section for 'Submission Template' - I believe you used the 'Drug' template for this one. Next time please include the link, makes it easier on us reviewers.
- In the extras, you mention "famous neko head" and some other things - it took me a moment to realize what you meant. Maybe expand on that section just a bit so that people understand what the head is for, where it's at, etc, and not that their dispenser comes with an actual decapitated head
Other than those couple of points, this looks good! Once @Charmaylarg Dufrain or @The KrimsonWulf gives this their approval and you've resolved that last point, I'll move on to the Approval process.
Full send. Full send
Nepleslia seal of approval. Send it
I sent him the link. I promise he has seen it
Its not a smoking item, it is a lozenge. It does not promote smoking of any kind. However it is a stimulant. By itself. The item in no way is a tobacco product. Your point is moot. However the concern is understood and appreciated. I have no issues. With wes looking this over again.
To many, nicotine products and smoking are inherently intertwined. Just because you've decided it isn't the same, doesn't make it so.
Because Wes is going to be away for a few days let's put this submission on pause or let the other Yamataian FMs decide since this is for use by exchange officers in Yamatai.
Because Wes is going to be away for a few days let's put this submission on pause or let the other Yamataian FMs decide since this is for use by exchange officers in Yamatai.
- Status
