@demibear Please review my notes in red and make the following changes and/or corrections.
*Please rewrite Paragraph 1 in the history section (after quotation). The legal issue is stated three times in this paragraph, while the technology being in the control of the Ketsurui clan is an ambiguous statement that vaguely alludes to it being an obstacle, but doesn't confirm it is the second.
*Paragraph 2 in the history section has the following sentence, "Then they did what they could to develop prototype as part of Project Shin that did not mimic the key aspects that made ST so successful." Please rephrase to "develop
a prototype" or "develop prototype(s)". Please clarify whether results were successful, partially successful, or unsuccessful in order to maintain an encyclopedic tone. The last sentence needs to be reworked or moved to the next paragraph, as it is unclear if this human female was given to Mikael Harris, Advancer, or some one else, or if they were the ones who gave her away.
*Paragraph 3 in the history section needs to be re-written in it's entirety. The second sentence is a fragment. The third sentence is a run-on sentence, this is confusing and should be broken down to be easily understood by readers. The third sentence also has redundant wording, "implanted with a neural implant". It is unclear what the subject of the last sentence is, the neural implant, it's storage component, the other augmentations, or the woman herself? This paragraph also leaves "Project Black" as an ambiguous entity; was Project Black the project to study the woman in the first place, an effort that formed after, or an organization?
*Paragraph 4 "It was confirmed that the
(please specify which implant, I am assuming it is the neural implant of the woman.) implant did indeed copy the
the memories of the individual, suggesting
(she was implanted with) some version of a primitive digital mind. But what really
estonished astonished the investigating team was that the implant also was interrogating portions of the brain in simulations the lead scientist believe made up the personality of the individual such as how they would respond in certain situations, favorite tastes, etc.
(Recommend breaking this last sentence down, it is a run on and could be made much easier to read.)
*Paragraph 5 When Zhuhai Medicial Industries was acquired, their prototype X7N1 implant implant (X7N1 implant) was merged into the Project (specify which project and fix capitalization as needed.) and then forked into its own, gaining the name becoming Project Kami. The implant's ability to increase the speed it took to convert short term memories into long term memories was similar enough to the woman's, that making a physical prototype took less time.
*Paragraph 6 For several months, the needed algorithms and optimizations needed to map a person's an individual's memories and develop a personal profile from it them were completed. The ShMBU implant with its ability to fully map the human brain initially physically disabled as research on how it might conflict with current laws continue. (Please clarify this sentence as it is unclear whether the implant or the brain was disabled.)
* Paragraph 7 Essentially a neural processor for the brain, the ShMBU has two primary functions. The first function is it can replay inputs received over in order to speed up the ability of the brain transfer for short memories into long term. The second function is it uses algorithms to reduce is capable of reducing (with algorithms) raw sensory input to images, videos, and audio recordings. This input can also be stored raw (useful for detailed analysis), but most opt not to as it is a reduction of available storage space.
*The Shin Mental Backup Implant is comprised of four (or five) main subsystems:
*Many individuals often recall being in a vivid dream while this occurs and often rethink past decisions due to the experience. It This process requires several months to achieve a perfect copy of the individual's mind. If the individual has a digital mind (or similar system), the back up is done within a virtual machine to allow no downtime, cutting reducing the time down required to a month.
*When complete brain death is detected (suspended animation has some degree of activity), the implant enters a fail-safe mode to prevent tempering with the stored data. Only with the right activation sequence, A proprietary activation sequence is then required to access the data, which can then be analyzed by quantum backed software to construct the data into the final profile. It is then uploaded into the implant with its nanites in write mode and inserted into a new body. The nanites then modify the parts related to memories and personality.
*Please fix wiki link issue in "or those that already possess a digital mind or corp:advancer:telepathic_implant."
*In total, the procedure takes four to 10 ten hours to be performed successfully.
*Headaches are a common symptom side effect while this occurs.
*The implant's operating system regularly checks for fragmentation of the the Shen stored within.
*This allows the system's maintenance nanites to maintain the the physical components of the implant, leaving its own nanites to restore the data to an organic brain.
*Future Enhancements section is incomplete. Please complete this portion of the article.
