• If you were supposed to get an email from the forum but didn't (e.g. to verify your account for registration), email Wes at [email protected] or talk to me on Discord for help. Sometimes the server hits our limit of emails we can send per hour.
  • Get in our Discord chat! Discord.gg/stararmy
  • 📅 February and March 2024 are YE 46.2 in the RP.

The Tsumi

IQ

Well-Known Member
Denote, this is a discussion, idea and help thread. I've got a rough idea and I have already several lovely people that help me out, be it with to bounce ideas off, to proof-read, to actually write stuff for me. This species submission is taking a lot out of me and while I really only approached the people closest to me about ideas and early stages, I think I'll benefit from putting it out in the open.

So yeah, some of you might have heard, or seen, me harping or complaining on about writing Tsumi, which in and of itself is a race I intend to create. Having talked to @Kyle regarding, he agreed to adopt them as a sub-faction for Neshaten. Going out of his way to write in an entirely new system for the Tsumi to settle down in. I'll take this ocassion to once again express my gratitude to him ^^

A short and quick summary, though a lot of things are subject to change still. Even before being subjected to the throes of the NTSE: The Tsumi are a race of warmongering semi-humanoids with a very cruel and punishing culture. Battle is glorified, honour is found in victory. The Tsumi are also indoctrinated into religion early on, making them reckless zealots that can go to war just to please their gods. Having gone through several debilitating wars, one of those featured an experimental bio-weapon, that soon took over their entire homeplanet, causing a mass extinction event, reducing their total population to 20 million. They fled their now uninhabitable homeplanet and wander to find unclaimed grounds. Tsumi culture features two extremes. The filthy rich and the wretchedly poor.

A link to the Tsumi WIP page.

I think I'll also use this thread as a sort of diary, on what I already did and potentially what I should do. I'd love to have feedback here as well, from anyone interested in this. What I already have done is their summary, the history, a large part of their culture. External links and warnings for more graphic topics such as scarification(I linked and cited safe sources, the internet has pretty disgusting images about it). Red links towards two named character, Mithrandis and Ballas, both characters important to Tsumi history, yet red-linked because I'd rather focus on the general race first.

Any hints, thoughts, topics of discussions are all welcome here. If you are completely uninterested, I'm happy you've still read this thread at all, there's no need to feel obliged to answer. All in all, thank you thus far :)
 
Indeed, I ended up starting over since I felt the one I had created a few days ago wasn't that well detailed for your faction. :)
 
For those following process or enjoying watching me fail at properly writing, I just finished their clothing article, I don't at all mind someone proofreading or even correcting the countless grammar and vocabulary mistakes I make :p

EDIT: It'd be great help, even. xD

EDIT 2: Finished the pantheon as well. Just need to add oracles, angels and a bit more explanation / clarification to the Saweyan church' traditions as well.
 
Last edited:
Added a small subsection under culture, well, two. But only one's written out; "Wraiths" and "Oracles & plague oracles", what remains for me to add is some form of angels or valkyries, or whatever I'll substitute for those. Sorry for the slow process, I have several retakes.

But that actually brings me to my next question. Art, how will I go about it? I'm not too rich, nor am I in the mood to get art for something that may or may not be declined. For example, I'd love to get my hands on art for the Wraiths, but with their photokinesis, it might be possible that they'll not make the final cut and be changed through the NTSE, which would completely scratch a major cosmetic detail I'd love in their art.
 
I have many art contacts, the other thing is we can submit them and ask for preliminary feedback to determine whether or not anything needs changing, as for photokinesis, as long as its a technological function not magic it should be able to stay
 
It's in essence a biological function, though one that's no longer present among the current Tsumi. It's been lost along with their homeplanet.
 
Added to the 'Sin-burdened'. Basically valkyries.

The list of what I need to do is slowly getting shorter and shorter.
- Warslave pshyiology
- Diet
- The environment of their former homeplanet(?)
- The Tsumi life cycle
- Food
- Language
- Naming
- Technology
- Economy

Still planning on re-writing a bit on male Tsumi clothing, as well as clarifying the general precipice. Big, broad-shouldered males don't do gothic loli, I feel :S


I have two questions for NTSE moderators or just people that know the NTSE better than I do regardless, actually.

Q: First off, their original homeplanet's been destroyed completely, do I still need to write up the environment there?

Q: Technology, do I need to follow certain templates, like a PA template in there, or are these treated as different articles and do I need to write technology as a rough, quick summary of their advancement levels?
 
  1. I’d write up what the environment was like, yeah - though I personally don’t think you’d need much then a paragraph or two to describe it.
  2. Depends on the type of technology, in my opinion. If it’s, say, something like with a definitive template (a ground vehicle or handgun, for instance), then yes; otherwise, no.
Edit: Actually, disregard my second reply - I misinterpreted your question. I’d personally write up seperate articles (i.e. one for their communications technology, one for their life support systems, one for their sensors, and so on), as trying to combine all of that information into a single article would be rather...difficult, in my opinion.
 
Aight, cool, thanks for the pointers. But now that I got you back in my clutches, @FrostJaeger

I've got roughy 6K words that need to be grammatically checked ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )

Seriously, only do that if you feel like it. Legitimately, I don't want to waste your time or make you feel obligated.
 
Alright. What did I do today? Well, I'm an idiot and made a table of their counting system, naming, food, diet, I can't really recall everything I've written. I've been busy.

https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=wip:tsumi#language

Legitimately. All that remains is a summary of their technology and economy. Which I plan on finishing after eating something and getting myself a smoke. So, today boys.

Today the Tsumi are finished.
 
RPG-D RPGfix
Back
Top