Round Robin

[Fay]

A round robin is a story where people take turns telling a part of the story. Just about Anything goes, and the story can do whatever the current teller feels like, as long as it has something to do with the previous section at the very least.

Rules:
No 18+ stuff.
You CAN kill any character at any time.
You CAN revive any character at any time.
Be as detailed or vague as you wish.
NO double posting!

Now... GO!

Galar Vanatosk and Kassiopea walked into a mall where the only thing that was sold was used shoes. Galar looked down the main hallway and saw that it looked as if it continued forever, much like the backgrounds in scooby-doo. He calmly disregarded this. Kassiopea nudged him and they walked towards a stand that sold used shoes, as all of the shops and stalls did. They were about to ask the clerk a question when...

A series of 600-pound HE bombs dropped down on the facility from the upper troposphere. The six-man squadron of bombers broke formation and headed for a nearby military base, when...

Galar burst from the rubble of the facility, shouting curses at the attackers. He then picked up Kassiopea and hurled her at the bombers. Suddenly...

It started raining nickels and DA from a plane carrying money that got hit by kassiopea, pelting Galar in the face with money flying straight downwards at nearly 300 miles per hour. until...

Galar attempted the sublimely magnificent Jecht shot mark III...and failed miserably. He fell on top of the coins that pelted him in the face a moment before. He raised his fist, but suddenly...

A bullet tore through the air, shredding one of his knuckles to bloody ribbons. The shooter was unnoticed, until...

A nickel pelted the shooter in the head and caused him to stumble off the building. Things looked bad, until...

They got worse, as the Mishhu decided to attack the shooter, and only the shooter, whoever he was, but he fought valiantly until...

A pair of large aether blasts annihilated the attacking Mishhu. The shooter continued his freefall and triggered a parachute, floating safely to the ground. THAT'S when...

 

[Fay]

Nevaraon stepped out of the shadows and caught the shooter. All of a sudden...

The shooter, with tears in his eyes, kissed Nevaraon deeply, UNTIL...

Kassiopea walked up to them and poked them until they broke apart. She was about to say something when...

Luca came out from hiding under a cardboard box. He said: "Showtime!", but suddenly...

Hotaru star fortress dropped out of FTL onto their heads. It would have crushed the Freespacer girl and yamataian man but...

They decided to line the cardboard box with Zesuaium. However...

The pressure exerted upon the cardboard box embedded it into the ground, crushing the box. However...

An eplosion ripped through the fortress that was on top of the box, splitting it in half. The people inside of the box were about to leave, when...

The two halves of the fortress blocked all exits from the box. All seemed lost, until...

An Aether beam conveniently ripped the top of the box open, leaving them free to climb into either half of the fortress wich was now filled with...

 

[Fay]

Half-completed Nekovalkyrja, who awoke slowly, with red eyes and half-formed flesh over skeletons and tendons, advancing towards the duo, causing them to...

Panic, until they realized they could shove the zombie nekos off the edge of the fortress, it was going well, until...

...They found out it was only a five foot drop, with ladders coming back up the wall and towards them. Things were looking grim, UNTIL...

Luca pulled out his handy little flamethrower to roast those zombies, HOWEVER...

His flamethrower's reservoir was filled not with napalm, but mint jelly.

The half-nekos, distracted, decided to...

Side with the one who gave them the mint, and helped all of them escape from the ruined star fortress. Unfortunately...

...Unfortunately that wouldn't make nearly a decent story, so instead the zombie neko once again turned on our 'heroes'. Luckily...

The mint jelly was a bit sticky, so the heroes had time to gain the high ground. Unfortunately...

The high ground did not add a +1 to armour class, due to arbitrary DM ruling. However...

It did add +5 to their attacks, making them more devastating than before, as the neko zombies were slower and poorly defended.At the same time, A new hero stepped out of a hatch to save the day. they were...

 

[Fay]

. . . A rampaging horde of fuzzy kawaii that were drawn to the inexorable scent of the mint jelly. They . . .

....Were immediately crushed under the footsteps of a 512 Automata, which proceeded to rip people's genitals off. Things were looking bad for our heroes when...

The heroes slipped in the mint jelly, and fell into another crack in the star fortress. They were relieved, UNTIL...

. . . The crack turned out to be a water slide that the GM wasn't going to reveal until two days later! As such, it was grossly incomplete, and . . .

... Ended with the heroes being dumped unceremoniously into the PA Bay. This was a good omen until the heroes figured out...

... that the PA bay was really 'heaven', and that they had died in the fall. Meanwhile...

Harrison, stranded with a pair of 30mm grenade launchers held one in either hand, with dual bandoliers of grenades slung Pancho Villa style across his chest, was fending off the zombie Nekovalkyrja fairly well. However...

REAL nekos, real angry nekos appeared and advanced upon the lone hero, when...

. . . A group of phods appeared out of nowhere with popsicles and strawberry ice cream to cheer them up, but . . .

they all died of heart attacks, but out of the corpses crawled...

 

[Fay]

Galar and Kassiopea, miraculously revived! Before they were able to greet the new hero...

. . . He was slain by the freak accident of an unmanned Mindy misfiring. Then . . .

Both grenade launchers discharged their payloads into the Mindy as harrison fell, critically wounded. The mindy exploded. Harrison looked like he was about to die, until...

he did. causing...

The GM, who wasn't prepared for the player's death so soon, revived him. Whilst this was happening....

...a certain Nepleslian Cadet wandered into the scene heavily armed. Things were looking good until...

Said cadet was mobbed by zombified and fully developed Nekovalkyrja prototypes. Things looked bleak, until...

Reinforcements paradropped into the battlezone, causing mass havoc, until...

The world exploded, leaving the story to continue on another planet, which was...

Undergoing a massive nuclear armageddon. Fortunately...

 

[Fay]

Luca had his tray table up, and his seat back in the full upright position. However, he forgot to...

grab his lucky bowling ball and autographed glow in the dark snorkel, wich were then stolen by...

A man with a flock-of-seagulls haircut and only one nostril. Eventually...

the whole thing erupted into a giant dance number, featuring Luca singing "I'm just dancing in the rain", with the Mishhu singing backup. This caused the audience to...

Start chucking molotov cocktails. All was going well (for the crowd) until...

A force field erupted in between the two, causing the molotov cocktails to fly back to their owners. The now-flaming crowd...

Decided to start a rock band and take the world by storm! Things were looking great, until...

Nevaraon crawled out from underneath a rock and pulled out his own guitar and outshreded the band's guitarist. that's when...

Guitarmageddon began. Only the most worthy to rock were allowed to participate. As soon as everyone realized this...

KISS had taken the stage. That was all well and good, but then...

 

[Fay]

the Mishhu attacked and slaughtered everyone except KISS who they worshiped like the gods they are

except the one true God got a little offended by this and slightly reversed the situation with judicious resurrections and lightning bolts, although it lacked ...

the power of the cards. When a true duelist channels his heart into his deck, the resulting energy...

results in the ripping apart of space and time, which resulted in captain Kirk and Captain Picard fusing into a single torso, appearing in the air above the spectators and falling into ...

A rather large bowl of tapioca pudding. At which Spock commented
"It's not logical!"
and then . . .

As soon as they appeared, the actors from star trek were transported to a trekkie convention that would span an eternity. At this point...

kittens fell from the sky, each with a parachute which was cuter than the last - unfortunately there were quite a few of them so ...

Everyone attending guitarmageddon fled the scene, some still on fire. However...

the kittens followed, their parachutes somehow being changed into hand-gliders firing beams of mineral water which ...

Quenched the thirst of the fleeing people and put out those who were on fire. This made them easy targets for the kittens, who...

 

[Fay]

hate water and ignored those they had just squirted, instead attacking KISS, until...

KISS was joined by Tenacious D, who's rocking blasted the kittens into low orbit. Meanwhile...

the devil, annoyed by his recent banishment returned through a legal loop whole and busily sodomized the Tenacious D with ...

A rubber chicken. However, before their downfall, Tenacious D was able to...

Cast the Pick of Destiny into the fiery volcano whence it was made. The resulting implosion caused....

several large insurance firms to close and the creation of a small and ruther uninteresting star which ...

Promptly flew into space while the Earth tried to collect itself from armegedon aka Guitarmegedon. In the meantime.

The stage was deconstructed and turned into...

A new version of Megatron who proceeded to...

beat up Robo-cop, who had recently been revealed to be having an affair with said person/robots wife-unit, with ...

 

[Fay]

The aforementioned insurance agency took the case and sued Robo-cop. This resulted in...

Boogers. They rained down from the heavens as the gods of comic, tv, and movie heros showed his displeasure of two heros resorting to the American legal system and setting such an example to children who should learn to beat the hell out of their enemies

Suddenly, the insurance agency stopped, looked at each other, then started beating each other up with their briefcases. The stunned crowd of onlookers who had magically appeared...

then they started a riot protesting that Mishhu are people too. Upon which statement they were.......

Mauled heavily for the affront. The Mishhu didn't want to be lumped into the same category as people. This resulted in...

A SUPER GALACTIC SHOWDOWN!!!! Hosted by the Smart-enough-to-get-outta-this Nevaraon Darkmidnight and...

(ooc only one more position open for co-host heh heh heh)

William Howard Harrison, who was also hoisting his own heavy weapon. This was all well and good until...

A huge Mishhu smashed the table they were hosting at. the generally pissed of the hosts who proceeded to

Poke the giant Mishhu until it died a horrible, agonizing death. The other Mishhu...

proceeded to decimate the currently alligned forces in an all out death match brawl. Many Nekos were targeted first unfortunately. This unfair racism caused...

 

[Fay]

their wroth to be unleashed all at once, causing...

The Monty Python foot to fall out of the sky, and crush...

a tiny pony who had previously been ...

trying to reconcile the two opposing forces. This brave pony was ridiculed by the...

nekos who thought that horses shouldn't be able to talk. but they were sad when it was crushed so they...

came together in a platonic orgy to form ...

an uber-neko. This uber-neko then...

proceeded to use their ultimate attack which was called......

Super-combined-mega-doom-blast. This amazing attack leveled the...

entire universe. except the cockroaches who then...

 

[Fay]

Declared themselves sole rulers of everything. This angered the spirits of the dead, who then...

became Poltergeists and tormented the cockroaches for all eternity until...

The cockroaches gave up. As they tried to make peace with the poltergeists...

The mushhu regenerated and easily conquered the universe *gasp* but one day a Mushhu scientist found ancient records of how to make warrior cat girls....

And the Nekos were born. However, the Mishhu weren't good creators and the Nekos rebelled, causing...

another universal war. The neko's first strike allowed them to regain the documents required to build their army. As they had no concept of the idea of money or jobs, everything was easier without taxes or governments to levy them. Their army soon grew to three hundred times the size of the mishhu army....

Until the Elite Team of Heroes entered the fray. This team included...

Bob the hurling Hobo, famed for his flammable concoctions as well as ...

Mark, the magnificient merovingean monkey (wearing only maroon) who screamed his mangled battle cry with the last member of the team who was . . .

Ronny the Rat with his amazing powers of enhanced rat senses and the ability to bite through solid deranium.

 

[Fay]

These heroes worthy of legend united with their respective strange battle cries, charged into battle, causing...

(okay, is anyone else going to post in the round robin? fresh ideas would be helpful)

the mishhu to huddle in fear and....

Zephyrite
Plead for forgiveness. The heroes laughed maniacally and said in unison...

"All your base are belong to us!" They promptly conquered every Mishhu base in the galaxy and the multiverse, causing...

A piece of chalk to be thrown at Joseph, who was sleeping in class and dreamed all of this. At least that's what he thought, when...

The door of the classroom was blown off of its hinges, as the Elite Team of Heroes flew into the room. They landed with a really cool lensflare and pointed at Joeseph, who...

Turned into a giant pile of desks, then flew out the window at enormous speed untill...

He hit a brick wall and slid sickeningly slowly towards the ground. Everyone turned, laughed and...

refered to him as the class loser for the rest of the year, then returned to their cliques where they cause so much drama amongst themselves that...

They spontaneously combusted. The resulting flames...

 

[Fay]

Were used by Maria, the great Neko blacksmith to forge a gun so great it could shoot 3 bullets every nanosecond that could travel up to 8 miles. with This ultimate gun she . . .

Forgot to turn off the oven and the gun was overcooked. The now burned gun seemed useless, except...

that it made a particularity good imitation of Hanako's lower spine which had previously ...

been threw far out of proportion by a particularly ornery Mishhu named Steven, who graduated from Mishhu college majoring in...

Being an ass. This degree helped him become who he was today because...

being a professionals donkey he found it useful to have a grounding in being an ass, rather than the rather more esteemed degree of being an arse which as everybody knows ...

You can only get in England. Which unfortunately was destroyed long ago by . . .

the pure win of its collective people, which also ascended them to enormous power and privilege ...

Where they were granted immortality. They realized that, though immortal, they still aged. And fast. All of them turned into living dust, causing...

great joy as they animated themselves into forms more beautiful than anything which could be previous imagined, indeed ...

 

[Fay]

They took forms that all seemed to relate to Jessica Alba and Johnny Depp in some way, due the sexiness that is them. This lead to disputes amongst themselves about...

whether to be straight, gay or lesbian, which led to several million brain haemorrhage's in internet users brains which are notoriously ...

Scrambled, due to the immense amount of stupid they take in each and every day. This builds up in their systems until...

They decide to make an IM engine that spammed up your computer until you couldn't go to any address in under an hour. Thus AIM was born....again. This lead to general outrage amongst the Cat-Girl Population resulting in

The decapitations of the bigwigs who revived AIM. The severed heads rolled into...

The future, and on Mars. They rolled in front of someone who looked like George Washington, who then drop-kicked the heads back towards earth. Everything was messed up, until...

Don Knots came onto the scene, dressed in drag and doing the can can to the tune of "Milkshake." The Universe gave up on living at this point, until...

Big letters fell from the top of the screen reading:
"PAVONIUS DA!!" Then some options came up, which read...

Code:
1. Install POVONIUS DA
2. Fry your hard drive
3. Become a Mishhu for all eternity
4. Install POVONIUS DA
6. Die a cruel death
7. Have your screen overrun with smileys and lols
8. Install POVONIUS DA
9. Be submitted to Chinese water torture
10. Have my uncle Fred use your bathroom for eternity
11. Give up and install POVONIUS DA


The director in his wisdom chose to . . .

Founded an interesting site about cat-girls and aliens that tentacle rape them. He soon became famous and was known as....

 

[Fay]

Mesly, the almighty. (who has no relation whatsoever to wesley) After a couple of years his site was full of awesome people, however...

a certain evil element, named Bob, acquired power and used it to commit a complicated mass suicide of monkeys which resulted ...

In the creation of a new generation of forum tards. The leader of whom was known as...

(OOC: *cough* We all know who should fill this role (redmoon) */cough*)

The person who says THAT QUESTAN WAS NOT FOR YOU!!!!! at everyone. All who gazed upon his disgustingness....

Perished a virgin, most befitting forum tards. Everyone, seeing them dead...

Celebrated until the sun came up. That's when...

the Preppy tards came out, characterized like by like their like use of the word "like" too often. They like started to verbally like abuse the forum tards "like" until

Everyone at the celebration got fed up with their over use of the word "like". This took less than a second. Also taking a second was their demise, which was spontaneous combustion. Everyone was...

at one with themselves. Until they decided they didn't really like themselves, and so became someone else, this person was ...

Chuck Norris, because that level of awesome cannot be contained within one true man with only one soul. All went well until...

 

[Fay]

The real Chuck Norris came by, And kicked the butts of all the Imposter Chuck Norrises. Many other people, who had been watching this on TV, were amazed at the utter devastation caused by one man. They were all warned "When you're In Texas look Behind you, Cause...

Chuck Norris may be behind you with a vat of spaghetti for lunch. In which case he'll want you to fetch him a big shaker of parmesan cheese. If you don't have one on you he'll send you to . . .

the rectal cavity of a fetid goat, renowned not so much for the quality of its cheese but for ...

But for its applications in punishment. After having all of their heads duly soiled, the the imposters were...

Forced to play the NES version of Mission Impossible (which is impossibly difficult, check Youtube), the players...

had to manipulate it using their eye-stalks, which were quickly grafted to their faces using ...

A blow torch and soldering iron. After the graft they soon resembled . . .

a very pretty pony, much loved by the late (and eternal) ...

Gork the punisher, who was famous for...

punishing, that being how he got his name, although in the past he was particularly revered for a spate of punishing brought against ...

 

[Fay]

a Pop Artist from ancient times when Man-kind was still just getting a hang of space travel by lanching overly large shuttles for ridiculously short amounts of time. that Pop Artist's name was...

Billy the Bobbing Bangcock Slave Merchant, noted for his alternate trade in ...

Location: If you need to know then you'll know...*ooooh mysterious*
slavery and chickens. thus his name being Billy the Bobbing Bangcock Slave Merchant. At least until new information came out that it was actually based on....

his past history with a woman, which involved...

 

[Kai]

Re: Official Star Army Round Robin

27 soccer balls, A potato launcher, and some old lady's hairpiece. This was a well kept secret until...

 

[rathmere]

Re: Official Star Army Round Robin

Gork The Punisher did his greatest punishing yet on him with . . .

 

[Nevaraon]

Re: Official Star Army Round Robin

a pillow, by continously beating him upside the head for 7 weeks on end. Poor Billy was on the verge of....