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Approved Character Daedalus Eikosidekas

I fixed the broken image link by using anon art.

He has a flesh tone skin tone.
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This doesn't really tell us (or an artist) anything.

Daedalus had to go hand to hand quite often
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Against Nekovalkyrja? It's amazing he's alive.

She is capable of performing combat lifesaving measures
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Please link the items mentioned in the Fighting section.

Santo Juni
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Have you played a character this high ranked before?
 
Describing skin tone has always been an issue for me since that is not something I tend to focus on. Anyone has a better idea I am more then happy to use it. I have expanded on his history a bit and fixed the skills section.

As for the rank, besides the PC for the PVP ship I am creating, Daedalus will be the first Warrant Officer for me. Unless you happen to think that is inappropriate.
 
As for the rank, besides the PC for the PVP ship I am creating, Daedalus will be the first Warrant Officer for me. Unless you happen to think that is inappropriate.
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I think what Wes is referring to is that in order to have a new character starting out at a rank higher than Santo Hei, you must have a previous character who was already at that rank.

Do you already have a character who was a Santo-Juni?
 
Ahh, nope. Mikael only got to Itto Hei.
 
First off, I okayed the rank for the purposes of plot. He's going to be the lead medical officer onboard, so I figured Warrant Officer made the most sense there.

For the character himself now.

Throw an extra section in the description section and add in the details about the wings, please. Mostly just color, you don't need the wingspan unless it's VERY abnormal.

Also in description, I'd like you to add something telling us what kind of hair he has. Is it straight, curly, wavy... possibly something in between?

For skin tone, try using a more detailed description. For example, you can use the word Caucasian to describe the general "white" skin tone most people think of, and then just detail from there with words like tan or pale.

Personality could use a fair bit more detail. Is he a dominant guy, or a bit on the submissive side? What kind of focus does he have (does he put work first, self-satisfaction...)? How does he feel about anyone other than nekos?

Same thing as I told the new guy, expand on the likes and dislikes. What kind of people does he like/dislike, what kind of activities in his spare time, etc.

Made a couple quick spelling changes in history (mostly nekovalkria to nekovalkyrja). Noticed a couple others afterward (come in hand = come in handy, etc.).

Under skills, make sure you add in all of the SAoY standard skill details as well, since he'd be qualified in all of that as well now. The first two sentences of Knowledge should be combined.

Under Inventory, put the standard Yamataian inventory, with the exception of the Power Armor equipment.

Character is pending edits.
 
With those changes made, you're Approved.

Last thing though please drop the profile in microsoft word if you would, there are still a good number of spelling and grammar errors in the profile.
 
Thank you, I did use office for the history. Didn't catch anything, but I will put the rest of it in as well later today.
 
RPG-D RPGfix
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