It's seven dings, and sundown! Welcome back to this new installment of Unbuttoned Radio, sent straight to you from the Old Courthouse in Once Osman city to each new glorious citizen of the galaxy.
I'm Marian Peck, and we'll first be bringing you our news headlines, before a live performance of "Nuzzlin' O'buzzo"! The latest installment of Star Harbor - Unbuttoned Radio's award winning Aural Drama. This episode is brought to you by Lundgren and Mizzlethorpe's Miracle Elixir.
First in news, USO agents have marched and flown south at last to return order to the shores of the Great Green Sea. As we all know, the twin Duchies of Tolmash; and Lahiri the Jewel of the South have been in functional anarchy since the end of the War That Was.
An army of Ragnarok Soldiers has been sighted marching south on the long road to enter the Twin Duchies, which have descended into Anarchy since the mysterious slaughter of the Grant Garrison at Fort Payne. With brigands manning the walls at Riverwatch-on-Twain, and rumors of "Metal Giants" seen abroad, we wish these brave men luck in bringing safety back to the trade roads once again.
News from the Jewel of the South shows that the USO has made an accord with the private militia of Industrialist Waldorf Cordlowe to bring order back to the Lahiri region. While the city is still destitute due to the rise of Mechanoidal Industrialismus in Once Osman, it remains to be seen whether efforts to modernize now superfluous factories will bear fruit.
We can only hope it does. The population of Lahiri remains at the cusp of famine due to gang controls of the supply of Algae intensifying, and increasing violence from clashes between militia and ice raiders from the south. One of our agents sought a statement from Waldorf Cordlowe himself, receiving only a brief reply:
Words of hope. We can only dream that the portents divine them true.
Chief of Medicine Dr. Rip D. Torr, recently presented an award by the former Royal Collegiate of Anatomy has given formal warning of the potential effects of eating at Akemi's restaurants. Due to the effects upon the stomach, excess consumption of their products may lead to obesity and diseases of the heart, jaw and bowel. The Chief of Medicine recommends restraint in purchases at these restaurants, and that one should always ask about the contents of their food prior to consuming. Overall it is healthier to avoid fatty and spicy foods, and listeners should be sure to exercise daily to maintain health and vigor.
...Brighter news on the Home Front!
The mining industry is safe again! Due to reasons mysterious, the population of the 'Vek-hole' was sighted marching towards the star port and shipped out of the sky by the freighter 'Pumpkin Eater'. With local miners no longer having their profits undercut by alien migrants; work has returned to the mining pits and quarries of Tyben.
With news of ruins of the First Settlers of our planet being found by starman dowsing, many facing crisis are turning their eyes to the deserts beyond the Green Sea for to prospect for potential salvageable relics and materials from space. While Brigadier authorities warn of potential dangers of pestilent radiance, toxic waters and miasma: This has not deterred many from striking out to seek their fortunes.
Due to the dues of the USO having finally been paid to the I'ee workers who initiated the Alien Renaissance of Once-Osman, we may now be seeing a retreat of these friendly but strange guests from beyond the skies. While the precise logistics haven't been steamed out, we recommend that if you have made a new friend among these little creatures that you find them and give them a hug before your last opportunity to do so passes you by.
While many see the loss of these workers as a cursed goodbye, increasingly worker gangs and merchants have been approached by representatives of the Black Hexagon to offer work in providing star-age conveniences to the planet. Soon we all may have running water, and lights without flame in all our homes. Something thought a dream as little as three seasons ago. Rebuilt streets from the great fires, and the toppling of the palace already have homes with such amenities! With celebrations taking place in the new great towers of Once-Osman, we have to wonder: Is the future smashing after all?
That's our last story for the night, thank you for your diligence in listening to the Revolution's Loving Eyes of Education, and please remember to take care of yourselves. Settle in, maybe make yourselves a cup of tea as we prepare for the newest episode of Star Harbor.
Once more, this program has been brought to you by Lundgren and Mizzlethorpe's Miracle Elixir.
I'm Marian Peck, and we'll first be bringing you our news headlines, before a live performance of "Nuzzlin' O'buzzo"! The latest installment of Star Harbor - Unbuttoned Radio's award winning Aural Drama. This episode is brought to you by Lundgren and Mizzlethorpe's Miracle Elixir.
Lundgren and Mizzlethorpe's Miracle Elixir! Staves off Scurvy! Quickens the Blood! Makes Warm the Heart and Copious the Nervous Disjecta!
Now available to you from all Brigadier Outposts, and the Traveling Market! On sale for three Usotzan Arcmarks a bottle for the next three weeks, in celebration of our great victory at Ee'ee.
First in news, USO agents have marched and flown south at last to return order to the shores of the Great Green Sea. As we all know, the twin Duchies of Tolmash; and Lahiri the Jewel of the South have been in functional anarchy since the end of the War That Was.
An army of Ragnarok Soldiers has been sighted marching south on the long road to enter the Twin Duchies, which have descended into Anarchy since the mysterious slaughter of the Grant Garrison at Fort Payne. With brigands manning the walls at Riverwatch-on-Twain, and rumors of "Metal Giants" seen abroad, we wish these brave men luck in bringing safety back to the trade roads once again.
News from the Jewel of the South shows that the USO has made an accord with the private militia of Industrialist Waldorf Cordlowe to bring order back to the Lahiri region. While the city is still destitute due to the rise of Mechanoidal Industrialismus in Once Osman, it remains to be seen whether efforts to modernize now superfluous factories will bear fruit.
We can only hope it does. The population of Lahiri remains at the cusp of famine due to gang controls of the supply of Algae intensifying, and increasing violence from clashes between militia and ice raiders from the south. One of our agents sought a statement from Waldorf Cordlowe himself, receiving only a brief reply:
"I'm sure the future will be smashing."
Words of hope. We can only dream that the portents divine them true.
Chief of Medicine Dr. Rip D. Torr, recently presented an award by the former Royal Collegiate of Anatomy has given formal warning of the potential effects of eating at Akemi's restaurants. Due to the effects upon the stomach, excess consumption of their products may lead to obesity and diseases of the heart, jaw and bowel. The Chief of Medicine recommends restraint in purchases at these restaurants, and that one should always ask about the contents of their food prior to consuming. Overall it is healthier to avoid fatty and spicy foods, and listeners should be sure to exercise daily to maintain health and vigor.
...Brighter news on the Home Front!
The mining industry is safe again! Due to reasons mysterious, the population of the 'Vek-hole' was sighted marching towards the star port and shipped out of the sky by the freighter 'Pumpkin Eater'. With local miners no longer having their profits undercut by alien migrants; work has returned to the mining pits and quarries of Tyben.
With news of ruins of the First Settlers of our planet being found by starman dowsing, many facing crisis are turning their eyes to the deserts beyond the Green Sea for to prospect for potential salvageable relics and materials from space. While Brigadier authorities warn of potential dangers of pestilent radiance, toxic waters and miasma: This has not deterred many from striking out to seek their fortunes.
Due to the dues of the USO having finally been paid to the I'ee workers who initiated the Alien Renaissance of Once-Osman, we may now be seeing a retreat of these friendly but strange guests from beyond the skies. While the precise logistics haven't been steamed out, we recommend that if you have made a new friend among these little creatures that you find them and give them a hug before your last opportunity to do so passes you by.
While many see the loss of these workers as a cursed goodbye, increasingly worker gangs and merchants have been approached by representatives of the Black Hexagon to offer work in providing star-age conveniences to the planet. Soon we all may have running water, and lights without flame in all our homes. Something thought a dream as little as three seasons ago. Rebuilt streets from the great fires, and the toppling of the palace already have homes with such amenities! With celebrations taking place in the new great towers of Once-Osman, we have to wonder: Is the future smashing after all?
That's our last story for the night, thank you for your diligence in listening to the Revolution's Loving Eyes of Education, and please remember to take care of yourselves. Settle in, maybe make yourselves a cup of tea as we prepare for the newest episode of Star Harbor.
Once more, this program has been brought to you by Lundgren and Mizzlethorpe's Miracle Elixir.
"L&M Elixir: It makes you go boing."