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Approved Submission ASE-006 Star System

Syaoran

Retired Staff
Inactive Member
Submission Type: Star System
Submission URL: https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=system:ase-006

Faction: Abwehran Star Empire
FM Approved Yet? I am the FM
Faction requires art? No

For Reviewers:
Contains Unapproved Sub-Articles? Kinda
Contains New art? Has a little star picture but I don't think it's new
Previously Submitted?No idea

Notes: One of the many pages that was never submitted because of ambitious plans for extensive detail. I simplified the page a little by removing links to specific articles for things that aren't RP elements and were never actually made.

Waypoint Logistics was technically unapproved, but it's simply an article stating that Way point trade has a 20 freighter logistics fleet that provides assistance. They're not military craft so I don't think it falls under military build up.
 
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What's with the missing planetary data? Also could you remove the link that goes back to itself?

Also if you could add a map pic, that would help I think.
 
Not sure what you mean by Map pic. And From what the page says ASE-006 is actually supposed to be missing it's celestial bodies all 'cept the star. (As mentioned int eh rumors section) I'm going to tie that into the plot I'm currently working with though. There will be some updates involving a new thing in the system, but first I want the system approved, then when I'll submit an approval for the new thing once I finish it.
 
As I am no longer staff or NTSE, another reviewer will have to determine the course of this submission.
 
Waypoint Military Outpost is currently unapproved or?

"...may at one time have add some sort..." (had not add)

"Role Play Opportunities for Independent Plots and/or Rest & Relaxation Arcs in Factional Plots for ASE-006." This is out of place, as it is under Rumors and Events. Maybe think about adding it to its own section or OOC? I kind of understand why it would be put there and if you move it, some text will have to replace it, but it just doesn't strike me as relevant. I'm willing to hear you out on this, though.

Something like this may be what Wes wants:



At the very least, say Grid 1817 and link to the map article.
 
Changed the text, it wasn't actually my own. I just wanted to minimize changes to the page. As for the picture, can I use that one? Since you already made it. Also Yeah the military station is unapproved, more like it was never finished. I'll finish that up too but the system itself is top priority for plot purposes.
 
Sounds good. Changes are good!

Want to take off the link to the military outpost for the time being?
 
I'll move it to an OOC section so that it's still on the page but not on the 'canon' part. So I can finish it, cause it's supposed to have been there a while.

Edit: Edits made
 
One thing I didn't catch is that there needs to be text underneath the header Planetary Data.

If you just add something brief, I'll approve this pronto and let you begin your RP there/ continue your work on the mystery "new thing" in the system : )
 
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