Approved Character Atverm Doe

New character for the bounty hunter RP finally done. I actually like how it turned out.

https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=ch ... atverm_doe

Hopefully I can prove to the GMs that I won't do anything stupid like last time and maybe strike a deal to have my other character rezzed.

Until then, it's time for bounty hunter fun. Just as soon as this get's approved.

I'm at work, so I'll be brief.

Don't worry about resurrecting your old character. From what Fian said, that character is dead as dead gets. Don't count on a revival.

I take that as part of how Nepleslia's canon operates. You die on Nepleslia; there's not necessarily a Soul Transfer available, though there's cloning.

It wasn't stupidity on your part. You took a chance; it didn't work out. It happens that way, sometimes, but it's not your fault.

As for this character, to be fair: You should subtract from the character's starting funds the prices of the weapons he's purchased. The character's not part of the military, so he's got to pay for his stuff.

First line in build needs to be removed. That's an opinion.

You need to come up with something new for a distinguishing characteristics. That not only needs to be physical, but it can't be opinion like that. IF that comes out in roleplay, then fine, but it hasn't.

I don't like the Crime Lord as a father. Being involved in a criminal organization, fine, but it just seems like you're trying to set him up for free gains in the future. And even if you do keep the father, remove "Crime lord" from his point in family. It doesn't belong there, it belongs in history if at all.

In communications you need to replace Nepleslian with Trade, which is it's actual name.

In technology, tone it down. There's no way he would be that capable when members of the military aren't that proficient in their own systems, especially since there's nothing in the history that says he's ever been to Yamatai, let alone for long enough to become proficient in systems that are seldom if ever used in Nep territory. Also, even if you keep it, it's Yamataian, not Yamatai when you're describing things from YSA.

In leadership, put the "Even more so" at the beginning of that sentence, not the end. I'd also like to point out (though I'll give Scot final say) that Leadership is a restricted skill. We very seldom let new players have it. You also need to take out the part about "In more cases than not, he usually isn't." Again, that's something that will come out from roleplay. More to the point, it wouldn't go there in any case, because Leadership doesn't apply to actually having control of a situation, only to how things are perceived.

I'm also going to veto you on the weapons. While you are allowed to have a few smaller ones, due to the plot you want to enter, I'm not going to let you add in a 16600 KS rifle for free, especially not when you're also adding in a full set of Durandium body armor. Also, did you read the article for the gauss rifle? It's not meant for use by infantry anyway, only for use in Origin's Impulse Armor. ID-SOL are stronger than normal, but not to the point of being able to use PA weapons with ease, especially a PA weapon with "Very high" recoil.

This character is pending changes.

A point about Leadership:

The skill is one that, while any player can technically have it (it's public speaking in large part, as Wes has argued), is best reserved for characters that actually lead people.

Kotori and Yukari both have Leadership, for example, but the styles of how that skill is executed are different. Kotori maintains a firm hand on her crew; not cold, but definitely aloof when it comes to guiding her team against opponents. Yukari is not as firm, acting more like a mother than a commander, but the Leadership skill remains. Sometimes, the execution styles aren't as different.

However, both lead the Miharu crew at different times. It's a skill they need because they have people who are under them.

Point being this: If you aren't leading people, you don't need Leadership. A more useful skill could be swapped into that slot.

All suggested character changes have been made. If I missed any please let me know.

Alright, since my other character is dead and not coming back by any stretch of the imagination, what are the chances of a successor. You did mention cloning. I might have heard it wrong.

Describe what you mean by "successor." Fian will ultimately have to rule, but the character mods can listen to what you have in mind.

Someone (anybody) clone's Avel in an attempt to replicate her fighting skill. But minus the emotional abuse and botched procedures that messed up the original. Hence the phrase 'successor'. They succeed for the most part and have a person who looks relatively the same, fights better than the original and has a completely different personality.

Besides that does everything on my current character check out?

If any DNA was gathered from the scene of her death, or if some plot hole could be contrived to produce some DNA, some level of cloning is possible. Pitch it to Fian.

I'm not sure what to make of the history, which is where I draw some inspiration to make plots more personal later on.

Also doesn't seem like much thought was on his motivation other than disliking the business that he was learning to lead, he would at least some attachment to the people that his father had shot up. How he came about having this emotional attachment, and then coming about his decision to leave would be the two missing links in the backstory. Doesn't have to be detailed fully, but enough to give a good idea how he developed it.

...It's also not up to me on if the character is accepted though.

Okay, in Communications, you killed the period when you switched words. Plug another one in please.

The other thing, which I thought about between my last post and now, is that this character doesn't make sense, from a psychology/choices perspective. You say part of the reason he wanted to leave his father was that he disliked the killing, but you have him slated for a plot which by it's very nature involves hunting people down and killing them. Granted, that's not all a bounty hunter does, but it's the single most prevalent job. I just find it hard to believe that he would walk away from his family and promptly go into a field that involves one of the things he supposedly didn't approve of.

This character is still pending, but close.

~~~~~

The other thing I wanted to say, as the mod who rejected your resubmission of Avel, is to please keep that out of this thread. While I personally have no problem with your desire to bring the character back, one way or another, I'm going to leave this one up to Fian, as the GM who killed the character to start with. Anything that happens involving that character at all requires his go ahead, in my opinion, so please talk it over with him privately.

You can't necessarily 'clone' someone to try and glean fighting skills from DNA. We as human beings come with some subset of 'genetic knowledge'. Example: A baby standing up for the first time. A baby walking for the first time. It's instincts to kick in water, etc etc. Advanced fighting techniques just wouldn't be there as they are learned via training over periods of time. Be it weeks, months or years. Such things are exterior stimuli that you take in.

For a full and proper clone though I am spotty on Neptech in that regard. But I do know they usually have a chip in their heads that stores a backup of memories and so on in the military. You'd have to get a hold of that if you want such things back I would wager. And as said chip is in military custody... You may have to let go and move on C-Man. :\

On the other hand, Soresu, you could clone someone with the genetic disposition for the physical capability to be trained at such a level. True, everyone might have the potential to be a kung-fu master given enough work, but someone with a proven superior combat potential would make it tempting to clone them and train that clone from "birth" to be a fighter. See the character "X-23" from the Marvel Universe (the weaponization of a clone, not the superpowers involved). Or the clone troopers of Star Wars (copies of a well-trained bounty hunter).

Once more, keep it out of this thread. It has no place here, and I will have you removed from the thread if you continue.

Keep the skeletons in the closet, boys.

Jeez... Just trying to help with a statement that got no definable answer. No need to get snappy. -Wasn't even aware he'd been warned before.-

Fixed everything up. Hopefully the history makes more sense now. I'm not exactly the greatest at understanding how a person's mind works.

Well, everything left looks good to me. This character is Approved.