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Star Army

Star ArmyⓇ is a landmark of forum roleplaying. Opened in 2002, Star Army is like an internet clubhouse for people who love roleplaying, art, and worldbuilding. Anyone 18 or older may join for free. New members are welcome! Use the "Register" button below.

Note: This is a play-by-post RPG site. If you're looking for the tabletop miniatures wargame "5150: Star Army" instead, see Two Hour Wargames.

  • If you were supposed to get an email from the forum but didn't (e.g. to verify your account for registration), email Wes at [email protected] or talk to me on Discord for help. Sometimes the server hits our limit of emails we can send per hour.
  • Get in our Discord chat! Discord.gg/stararmy
  • 📅 December 2024 is YE 46.9 in the RP.

Approved Character Belial Ecanus

Aside from a rather large number of spelling errors, I like it. He is skilled while not being overpowered, and has an interesting and unique history.

Clean up the spelling A LOT and it should be good.
 
Numerous typos

Description
posses should be possesses

Personality
whom reeks should be who reeks

Belial trends towards -> Belial tends towards

posses a mile-long - > possesses a mile-long

History

making the the latter -> making the latter

Skills
Communications needs to be fixed. Look at the standard Nepleslian training, they wouldn't let him progress if he didn't meet muster.

"have these skills trained into them through a rigorous boot camp training program" So at least the items in the list for basic, should be better represented.
https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=writing_your_character_s_skills

Inventory
Starting money is missing.

Starting pay of: 6000 DA

This character is not yet approved for use Overall an excellent first attempt.
 
RPG-D RPGfix
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