RP: 188604 Corgan and Akemi Sauna Meetup and More

[Amaryllis]

>IN Akemi's Cockpit Sauna. 188604.

The sauna's place on this planet was one which had a long and storied history of being a past-time solely for the most extravagant and rich on the planet. That there would be one in the establishment purchased by Akemi was a bit unsurprising. Exactly how Corgan and Akemi wound up in one alongside a knight and a boxing champion was probably best left up to the imagination, however. At the very least the new imported towels weren't scratchy fabric like the old ones, leaving one to focus solely upon how the steam and gentle heat washed away the awful dusty feeling of the city's streets and the planet's planes.

Where to start Akemi wondered as he looked across at his new acquaintance wearing nothing but a warm smile. Hopefully Corgan was a Nepleslian and the intimacy of the situation would cause unease and give him an edge as well as some mirth at the other man's expense. Mostly he wanted privacy and a potential laugh. "So, what's your story? With Uso and everything I mean."

The big Nepleslian had his towel tied firmly around his waist, making sure his goods were completely covered. He didn't want Akemi looking at anything but his face. Not that he was embarrassed about being naked around another man. It was a new experience being in a sauna so he was unsure exactly what the point was, but he could only think about it being used by lovers and he didn't want Akemi getting the wrong idea. "Do you Yamataians do this all the time? What's the point? It's hot and humid. Nothing enjoyable about hanging out in here." He wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. His eyes wouldn't move in the woman's direction at all.

He sighed. "To answer your question, maybe I should start before Uso. I left Nepleslia to join a PMC called Ragnarok. After our first mission we got hired by Uso to come here and take over the place. I had no idea we would be here this long. Probably wouldn't have come if I'd known."

"Well actually this splendid idea was my pal Smithee's over here," Akemi answered as he casually raised an arm and pointed to the dashing knight with an upturned palm. The Neko loved that his buddy's breathtaking beauty was completely unchained in this situation. Surely it could prove a potent weapon. "I really quite enjoy it." He certainly did. He clearly appeared in his element. Leaning back with his legs spread open and his arms out at his sides he was the picture of contentment. On top of being absolutely absent of bodily insecurity he had the advantage of being designed not to sweat. "So what all do you plan on doing now that you're here?"

For his part, Smithee just lay back against the wall, wearing only a towel about his shoulders that he occasionally dabbed against his face, while tending the fire and stones. Olena lay slumped against him, towels from the torso down with her eyes closed and sweating off a hangover.

Corgan kept his eyes on Akemi's face. "I can see that, although I would rather not. My plan is to create my own branch of Ragnarok focused on mechanized warfare. I have the support of Arccos, Uso, and Cyrus, the leader of Ragnarok. What I don't have is manpower. That's why I wanted to train and employ Asantren."

"Dantratten." Smithee perked up from the corner. "They are the Comte and Comtess Dantratten, who own Asantren on the east coast of the Green Sea... Or were, given that Lady Penelope's husband was shot some time ago..."

"Asantren is where they live, then? I thought it was what Amana's forces were called. My mistake. I'm sorry about her husband. That wasn't supposed to happen." Corgan replied.

"No skin off my back." Smithee said with a little chuckle. "He was a terrible customer. Paid to lie in a bed with a sleeping woman and do nothing at all... We presumed that Lady Penelope snored..."

Akemi liked how Corgan was trying so hard to ensure he didn't get a good look at the genervous view he was offering. It was definitely a spectacular spectacle considering the rest of his otherwise slender form. "Well like I basically said before I'm interested in making my own kingdom and getting some nobles together to run it so I can have some fun playing at king. I'll be making it worth everyone's while by providing so much regardless of how well I handle things they'll all be better off than before I came. I have no intention of trying to usurp Uso or anything. I just want to enjoy having free reign to the fullest. As long as you'd let me govern my own people as I'd like our goals won't have to conflict at all."

Corgan laughed. "You sound a lot like Uso. Well, she doesn't care about nobles and all that, but it's the same principle. I don't really care if you try to usurp Uso, as long as I keep getting paid. But yeah I don't want to do all that governing shit, seems like too much work for little reward. From what I've seen so far, people want to kill you even if you're actually helping them. I guess we did kind of kill a whole bunch of people when we first showed up.." He trailed off, looking at Smithee and Olena. "Probably not the best idea but I doubt anyone would have listened if I said anything about it."

The Neko felt the muscled mercenary was completely missing the mark when it came to assessing being a ruler. "Too much work and too little reward? But what about wearing the fancy, eccentric, native outfits? What about naming things after yourself or something silly? What about getting to arbitrarily decide the fate of pathetic, little commoners? I'm gonna get super dolled up when we meet the tailors. I'm gonna ask them for the most ridiculously fabulous things they can come up with and leave myself at their creative mercy."

He shrugged. I have no interest in any of that, except maybe naming something after myself, but I plan on taking care of that with my division of Ragnarok. I like the name Corgan's Reavers right now. Although Drop Bears is another name I'm considering."

"Drop Bears sounds pretty swell. What are they like?" Akemi was pretty interested in the native wildlife.

"Foul tempered, enormous and adorable." Smithee said, relaxedly. Pouring more water out to steam up the sauna some more.

"Oh, so just like Arccos?" the Neko instantly asked. Maybe he'd manage to get a reaction out of his noble neighbour.

"I haven't seen one, but I heard Ace ran into one. I haven't strayed very far from the city and the Green Sea. And Arccos is sometimes foul-tempered, and I think she's adorable, but she's hardly enormous." Corgan looked at Akemi differently, as if judging the competition. "You think she's adorable too, then."

Smithee seemed to not really care about Akemi's affections towards Arccos. He just sat quietly, enjoying the atmosphere of the sauna.

"Oh yeah, I think she's really nice," the svelte Starman answered enthusiastically. "I love her big nose. I've seen her little in person but I've got a perfect memory. She's enormous in the sense that she's much larger than me which I find very attractive." He thought about saying more and possibly changing the subject but he figured he'd wait to see how Corgan would respond.

"I'm planning on asking her out on a date. She's different than the women I'm used to dating. I didn't notice my attraction to her right away, but.. I think she might be the first person I've ever felt this way about." He stopped when he noticed he had said more than he meant to. "Are you looking to have a relationship with her, or do you just love her body?"

"I'm frankly looking to be her buddy and diddle her at least once but she hates my guts because I'm a Neko. I'll never stop trying though." Akemi's words were delivered in a very manner-of-fact manner and filled with quiet determination and confidence. "I hope you manage to have a great date with her and develop a swell relationship. As you may have heard us Neko, myself included, commonly engage in polyamory. Same with Freespacers."

"I hope so too. And don't mind sharing her with other girls, if that's what she wants. Other men, I'm not so sure about.. It's a big change from what I'm used to, like I said. I don't think she's going to get over her Neko hatred. Doesn't seem like continuing to pester her is the best strategy." Corgan said earnestly. "I shouldn't be giving the competition advice, but try to do something to convince her you're different than the rest of the catgirls and boys. Your former affiliation with Yamatai's going to make it like hard mode in one of those dating sims, except you can't reload your save and try again."

Akemi shrugged, raised his arms and upturned his palms. "Well if I blew her brains out after I messed up she might lose some memories and that'd let me sort of start over. I'm gonna do plenty to convince her I'm a good guy. I'm gonna help the planet in exchange for getting to be a hedonistic, royal dandy. But forget her for a moment, man Amana and Penelope were great. What do you think of them and their family Smithee?"

"Provincial." Smithee explained. "Their family's only worth was military might to defend Tyben."

"Well how mighty are they now?" the raven-haired kitten asked. "Who do you think I should try to work with personality wise and resource wise? Who would you like to see me marry?" He loved barraging his buddy with questions.

"Tyben is now held by starmen forces." Smithee ran a hand over Olena's shoulder. "Their strength is irrelevant after the grand Osman Army was crushed. And you should marry the one your heart most yearns for."

Akemi felt himself smile hard. "Awww. That's super sweet. Keep talking like that and marrying you will be the answer. If I can't find someone nice you're my backup option if you wouldn't mind. I'd be honoured to have a wife as wonderful as you."

"'E's already married." Olena interjected sleepily.

"I prefer Amana, I may have said that already. But I'm not marrying either one unless it doesn't work with Arccos, so it doesn't really matter what I think." Corgan said.

"Oh," Akemi said, having not really considered the possibility when he spoke. "He is? To who? If it's you he's awful lucky."

"We do not speak of my wife." Smithee said simply, "Rest assured, she is fine. All is right with the world."

The Neko raised two palms directly in front of his chest. "Well alrighty. I won't pry. I just wanna say if you ever need any help involving her or any relatives feel free to ask. I wanna do as much for my pals as I can."

"'e's really like a dog." Olena mumbled in the steam. "Not a cat a' all..."

"Is this the only reason you wanted to meet?" Corgan asked suspiciously. "To talk about girls? We going to braid each other's hair next?"

"This is about as professional as he gets, unfortunately." Smithee said, "You're best off asking myself if you need strict information on what you're undergoing soon."

"Well I brought you here to ask what your plans were but then you said you weren't interested in controlling any land and setting up your own government or something," Akemi answered. "Are you gonna just provide people protection out of the kindness of your heart?" He turned to Smithee. "If he protects them wouldn't you say they're gonna see him as their lord or something like that?"

"My understanding is that the little starman seeks adulation of the masses before much else. That and perhaps profit." Smithee explained. "But yes, they would see him as something akin to a lord. Lord Protector being the specific title that would likely come to apply."

Corgan sighed. "I'm not interested in telling people how they should act. That's Grant's thing. I just want a place to keep my soldiers and I want people to fight with Ragnarok for a share of our profit. I would let the people decide what to do with themselves. Protecting them will be the same as protecting myself because I will be living and working here too. Not in some huge mansion but in a military base. Joining is strictly voluntary. I don't care if people like me or not, but it definitely makes things easier."

"Good then," the Neko replied with his arms crossed. "I just didn't want to meet these nobles and find out I had to compete with you for their allegiance or whatever. If you're just going to recruit from everywhere and take a piece of land then I guess there's nothing more to discuss. You could just go proposition some women in here or get drunk or whatever you want and I'll pay for it and then we can meet up at the tailors."

"Then maybe you can help me get the bandit problem in Lahiri and Tolmasch under control. I'll probably be setting up there if I can find a nice big butte to build on." The Nepleslian said, grinning. "I might still compete with you in the bar and brothel business though. Bring some space women down here for the locals." He accidentally forgot where they were and looked right at Akemi. A look of horror spread across his face. His cheeks turned bright red as he looked away quickly. "You really should put that away man."

Akemi chuckled with a big goofy grin. "Oh come on man, we're both guys!" He looked over at Smithee and Olena to catch their reactions. "Sure, I guess I could if there was something in it for me. I was actually thinking I might like to go slaughter some bandits so I could take their land and give it to some people to entice them to work with me. I suppose if you promised not to humor Arccos whenever she might want to bully me and you gave me credit for helping clear crummy people out I could help."

Corgan laughed. "Can't promise anything on the Arccos bullying thing, except that I won't participate. I do plan on keeping this noble family, the Mnochis from taking back their land. I won't let them come back in and benefit from my labor. Best thing to do would be to eliminate them so they don't cause trouble. No taxes, no big government. Just protection from bandits so the people can prosper."

"I guess I could show up in a custom power armor and spook some people but I doubt you'd really need my help with anything," Akemi said. "Just tell me what you'd like me to do when you've got a plan and you're ready." He once again looked to his native pals. "What's your take on these Mnochis people?"

"If there's any left, they're fine folks. Good military family." Smithee said easily. "...If there's any left, of course. Most of them were killed by the Grant rebellion."

"My plan is to kill the bandit leaders and offer them a chance to join me. If they refuse we'll kill them." He said casually. "So, fine folks like your General Lewis who killed the prince to incite violence?" Corgan asked, turning to Smithee. "If I had been a native, I'd have been fighting with Grant based on the stories I've heard. I grew up on a world with widespread gang violence and even I think you nobles are terrible."

"The King is dead. Long live the prince. The Prince is dead. Long live the Empress." Smithee said, a little iron in his voice.

"Are any of the Mnochis guys your friends?" Akemi asked. "If you'd like to work with them or offer them help you just tell 'em I'll take care of them and invite 'em over. A friend of yours is a friend of mine."

"Doesn't bother me if you offer them a place in your lands if you promise to keep them out of trouble. They show up in Tolmasch with an army, try to interfere with me or people under my protection, or send people to get it back we might have problems." Corgan said with conviction. "Enough talk about that. I hear you have some kind of fighting arena around here. I want in."

"Then you are the only one in the starman division. Congratulations arena champion." Smithee said, opening one eye and looking at Corgan. "I'm sure Akemi will sort out your championship belt post haste."

"What, no one will fight me? I'll fight with a handicap if you want. Maybe me against four natives? Promise not to use any space weapons or armor. I'll even take off my right hand." The Nepleslian replied, gesturing at the metallic black cybernetic limb..

Smithee's Starman couldn't pass up an opportunity to help him. "Well before we discuss anything else I dunno if we've talked enough about the Mnochis folks. If they're Smithee's friends can you go clean out some other bandit den instead?"

"The Mnochis held their land for years against encroaching bandit clans from the south. They kept the towns fed, and the people safe. I don't know what more anyone there could ask of them..." Smithee explained, "I was good friends with Laurence Mnochis, if he is still alive I would be quite happy. But I hold no hope for what is unlikely to be. As for the fighting pits, could you not just get some other Starmen to fight you? You have an entire army here, surely many would like to make money as a prizefighter."

Corgan shrugged. His body was covered in a sheen of sweat by now. "I guess we have higher standards on Nepleslia. Like I said, I'm not going to wipe out all the Mnochis. I guess it's possible to make some sort of deal with them if they're willing, and still alive. Really don't want you to have a reason to work against me." Akemi's love for these useless people was starting to annoy him. It was fine with the Dantrattens, he really didn't care about that whole business. Now it was just making his plans more complicated. Kill them all was his usual go-to.

"I guess I could find someone to fight. Think people would pay to see two aliens duke it out in the ring? We could make it a thing, broadcast arena fights to the stars. Maybe we would have several divisions. Regular, Enhanced, and Mixed. I know it's a thing on Nepleslia. We just need to build a better venue and get some fighters." He said, thinking out loud. "I could chip in and offer a car to the winner in addition to Arcmarks. Might bring in more people."

"People would pay to see it, certainly. They would pay triple if you did it naked." Smithee said easily, "Although you're unlikely to go for that, I can see... Not sure I understand this... Casting broad, though."

"Can you think of another place in a similar situation he could go looking to claim instead?" Akemi asked. He then looked to Corgan and spoke in a gentle tone that said he didn't want give anyone grief but things simply were the way they were. "Smithee is my number one pal. Maybe I shouldn't tell you that because that might make him someone's target in the future but it'd be easy to figure that out anyway. I'd like everyone to walk away from here happy."

"Hey, I won't hurt him just because he's your friend. But tell me, is there a single noble family you don't have friends in, Smithee?" Corgan queried.

"I'm no friends of Blake, or Lewis. The mudmen of the southeast are distant, and the Sea Lord is a terrible boor." Smithee said, "Although custom dictates that I am friends with all of my social standing, I wouldn't really shed a tear for most of them."

It was annoying, but Corgan guessed he would have to try a peaceful solution if he wanted to keep from making Akemi an enemy. "Fine, I'll give Mnochis a chance to make a deal. If he's even alive. Happy?" He said sharply.

"I'd be happier if we could find somewhere else for you," Akemi answered, his voice remaining pleasant. "I don't care if it's a more resource rich area that's easier to control. I just want my friend's friend to be happy if the guy is alive. I bet there are better places out there for you while Laurence only has his one ancestral land." The Neko turned to Smithee. "Isn't there some other bandit infested hellhole he could have fun with?"

"There is an entire world of deserts infested with bandit clans, and feckless nomads." Smithee said, "And frankly, we can't stop you from going wherever you like, Ambassador. Your Sheriff doesn't care, I don't know why you do."

Corgan rolled his eyes. "I'm not asking your permission Akemi. I really don't give two shits about your happiness. I didn't want us to end up as enemies. That's the only reason I came. I'm doing the work of getting the guy's land back for him. He should be happy enough to get his home back. If that doesn't make him happy, he can get the hell out and move back to whatever hole he's living in." He stood up and walked out of the sauna, forgetting to hold his towel. It fell to the ground and he didn't even notice.

As Corgan exited the sauna Akemi stood and followed him out into the locker room. "Well buddy if you're gonna try to brush me off maybe I should just disappear you right now and save myself trouble down the line. You're in my tavern after all. All I'm asking you is to fuck off somewhere else. Give me grief and yeah you can consider me an enemy." The Neko gave the Nepleslian a good steely stare that wasn't actually very threatening at all. It mostly just made him seem very stubborn and maybe cuter than usual, especially with his childish crossed arm pose.

"I feel like you keep getting in my business at every turn ever since you showed up. First the Glass Rose thing, then Arccos, now my plans for Tolmasch?" Corgan sighed and shook his head. He walked over to the locker he was using, picking up a towel on the way. "I'm trying to be reasonable, man. I could just kill the guy. If you're not willing to accept my compromise we have nothing to talk about." Corgan said, toweling off as he spoke. He looked at Akemi and noticed the child-like pose. Unfortunately Corgan wasn't a big fan of children, so it came across strange instead of cute to him.

Akemi sighed forcefully. "Dude, as things are now Arccos is never gonna do anything with me and her dislike of me is something you can use to bring the two of you closer together. I'm not gonna try to sabotage your chances with her. I'm even tempted to say I'd help you get together. As for Amana and Penelope, I'm not stopping you from recruiting from them or anyone else. I just want Laurence to have his piece of crummy land. I'll go drive the bandits out myself and they can go run to you for recruitment. I'm sure there's a noble out there with nice land who would love to have your base on it."

"I'm sure there is. I don't share your fascination with nobles. I don't want to have to deal with politics and all the bullshit that goes with it. Tolmasch is a central area. I don't want to fight you. Hell, for all we know the guy is dead." Corgan replied. He pulled on his plain black boxers. "Let's find out what happened to him before we talk about this any further. I'm not really invested in the Dantrattens. You can do what you want with that can of worms. I will still go to their party and play the part of Ambassador, but you can have them."

"Sure, that's what I was going to ask we do," Akemi replied quickly. "We don't know if he and his family are dead and even if they are you might find a hot noble with a bandit problem willing to suck your dick and give you much better land to build your base on. You could even just kill them or threaten them to vacate if you don't want to talk to them. Maybe Amana will be that hot person. I'll make a pitch for her family to work with me but I bet she'll choose you. She already gave you her family's sword to pledge allegiance after all. Could you just humor me and bang some chicks and drink some booze here before you go so you leave in a good mood? It'll all be free."

Corgan finished putting his clothes on. "I don't think I feel like banging any chicks when I am going on a date with Arccos soon, not until I know how she would react. But I will drink your liquor and watch people beat the hell out of each other." He replied. "You won't expect me to pay you back, right?"

"Dude go ahead and fuck someone if you want to. No one has to find out. I swear I won't tell Arccos. Just don't beat them up or kill them." Akemi chuckled at how unnecessary his last words likely were. "Everything is free. Just don't load up trucks and take everything in stock. I can supply food to your mercenaries at super cheap prices if you want. I might even hire them for help in the future if you'd let me."

After calming down a little while getting dressed, Corgan was feeling like the whole thing was pretty silly. He turned to offer Akemi a handshake and suddenly remembered he was naked. Instead of freaking out he just shrugged and held out his hand. "Sure." He looked at Akemi's face for a second. "Wasn't there a Neko pop star named Akemi or something?"

When Corgan offered the hand Akemi imagined for a moment he might be extending it to sneakily grab him and hold him still so he could deliver a sick sucker punch. He still took it though. "Yeah, that's me." The Neko gave the much taller man a big toothy smile. "I used to be a little girl but I liked girls so much I decided to become a guy so I'd have better equipment for diddling them."

Corgan recoiled in shock. "You... are that Akemi? But I had posters.. And I.. No way. I think I might go shoot myself now." He shook his head. "That's too weird for me. I am just gonna pretend that I never found out. See you at that party." The stunned Nepleslian turned and walked out into the bar slowly. It seemed like his whole worldview was just destroyed.

Being a true pal Akemi mentally messaged a Neko employee he brought down to help Corgan have a good time.

 

[Amaryllis]

Then he walked back to Smithee and Olena and crossed his arms. "That Laurence guy really is a good friend of yours right?" He gave the knight a serious parental look that demanded he not joke around.

"We attended this university together. Shared a room." Smithee explained, "We were... Quite close."

"Well I'm really fucking glad then," Akemi said in a smooth, pleased manner. "I didn't want stick my neck out for something trivial. Not that I'm saying I think you'd mess with me. I hope this shows I really care about you guys and doesn't make me seem too eager to please."
After a little time passed Akemi decided to speak again. "Uh, I was kinda hoping for some reassurance and a thank you there but now it'd just come off forced. Got any idea of how I can track down this guy? You'd like it if I found him alive right?"

"While it would be good to see Laurence again..." Smithee said uneasily, sliding his trousers back on in the changing rooms, "The Mnochis legion of the Grand Army was crushed long ago. Your sheriff's men have raided his lands several times to scour for rebels, and the southern tribes have encroached. If he is alive and well, it would certainly be somewhere that not even those close to him would know of."

Akemi sighed and smiled. He was a little frustrated but also amused. "Damn, it's your princess all over again. Well how would you go about looking for him or getting his attention and making him reveal himself?"

"Public spectacle." Smithee said, running a towel over his shoulders, and standing to pick up and unfold his shirt. "Make a mess of someone causing a problem down there, and make it clear that you're doing it to return the land to its owners."

"Dang," Akemi replied sounding pretty darn relaxed considering the Corgan crisis a moment ago. "I was kinda hoping there was some magic way we could find him without getting started on actually cleaning up the place. That does make an awful lot of sense though." As the Neko spoke he did nothing to address his nakedness. "Then I've got two questions for you. Who actually has a lot of manpower left and what do you think I should know about these bandits if I were to go right down there now and try to deal with 'em?"

"The Grand Army was dispersed, but your people only defeated them with nine men. Many of them unable to carry that much ammunition if your weapons are any indication." Smithee waved a hand towards the PIMP on the changing bench. "While many have gone to join your Sheriff, many more returned to their homelands. An alliance with noble families would give you the ability to call upon their men. Most of the Osman garrison has merely returned to their homes, and presumably to the gangs, however... If you want to go the dirty route."

"Well here's what I'm thinking pal," Akemi said smoothly. "I could go into that place in a big awesome looking suit of space armor and just murder everyone but then I'd be killing peaceful non bandit people. I just want to find people I can decently trust to equip with much weaker space weapons and armor that'd still be better than your gun over there. I gotta get you a better one by the way. You and Olena." The little Starman only wanted the best for his buds and he'd be sure to get it for them. "I'd like to find a bunch and actually secure part of the place and hold it without killing everybody and maybe we could keep some residents and get some bandits to join us."

Smithee's face scrunched up as though he'd eaten something sour at the prospect of recruiting bandits, "Do you really need to bring thieves into the fold?"

"No, but bandits sound romantic in books and I'd like to get as many people as I can on my side. That and I don't know how bad these guys are. Maybe a lot are just soldiers who deserted. How bad are they? Is everyone there an awful thieving crazy murderer? Can none be reasoned with? Are they cannibals? Lay it on me." Akemi was kinda hoping at least a few were cannibals. He was also really hoping whoever he was going to be killing or recruiting would at least look cool. Cool like his post apocalyptic movie marauders.

"Depends on which bandits you're talking about. Most of them are..." Smithee paused as he buttoned his tight starched collar, "A bunch of murderers, rapists and thieves. The northern tribes are rumored to practice cannibalism. None of them are of good breeding, and certainly none of them are gentlemen."

"Does Laurence have any buddies who would help him take his place back?" Akemi had been quite wanting to ask that question for a while but he suddenly came up with another that might give him a far more satisfying answer. "Heck, do you know of any goody goodies that would help me take the place? Are there any trustworthy people just waiting for a leader to kill some bandits in exchange for a new better place to live?" The little Starman would love it if there was some special knightly order of super comically moral people he could call upon or some big group of poor, disgruntled commoners that formed a rowdy ragged army and was itching to civilize some lawless place. It'd be absolutely fantastic to him if he really got to a genuine man of the people.

"Most such groups are little better than the bandits themselves." the knight explained, "Laurence's connections I cannot speak for. We've not been in contact for some time. Over a year at least. Most 'goody goods' are just gangs people band to that they may protect their own. Usually from another gang which was set up to do just that."

"That sucks," Akemi said emphatically. "I was hoping you had some order of the whatever that was super religious and austere and was all about helping the helpless. At least allegedly."

"There were charities. They usually worked for the nobility, who have been disbanded for the most part." Smithee sighed, "Hard to operate without a patron."

"Well you gotta put me in touch with these charities so they can tell everyone how nice I am." Akemi placed his hands on his hips and puffed out his chest. "I'll give away thousands of free better than Algaeia meals if it'll assure me some gratitude and more customers. How religious are people? Is there some savior I can pretend to be or some deity I can be the avatar of?"

"Not very religious. People believe more in curses than a deity." The Knight slid on his waistcoat, buttoning it up. "Something about this planet tends to rob one of the belief that there's some sort of kind and all powerful being who would save us."

"That's a shame." Akemi finally started getting dressed, starting with clothing his lower half. "You guys have printing presses right? Newspapers? What's literacy like?"

"Literacy is common in the coastal regions. Although the printing presses were the first thing confiscated by the Sheriff's men." Smithee said with a slight sigh as he sat down, pulling his boots before him.

"Whaaat?" Akemi cried as he pulled up his beautiful brown breeches. "You guys can't even get new books and newspapers? It's one thing to confiscate what she needs to make her currency but she took the ordinary stuff from you too?"

"She prints books and newspapers." Smithee said, pulling on one boot. "But she saw it prudent that the new empire control information."

"Well fuck that buddy. You're getting your fuckin' freedom of expression back." Akemi swiftly shimmied into his billowy dress shirt. "You tell whoever you'd tell that I will give people the means to mass produce literature again. I could dedicate a part of the university to it or somewhere else near us. All I ask is they put in some advertisements about my place and talk about me from time to time." The space kitten thought about forcing everyone to only ever write positive things about him and being super dictatorial but he figured that'd be less fun, more work and unnecessary to create a plenty good image for himself considering how helpful he was going to be.

Smithee finished dressing, buttoning the cuffs of his shirt and shaking his head a little.

"There is only one library on the planet. The vast majority of literature is small slips of paper anyway. There was never truly the resources to make large amounts of literature..." Smithee explained, "Books may be very common where you are from, but they are luxury items here."

"Well you tell any people who like writing that I'll let them write whatever they want if they come over here." Akemi moved on to his own fashionable boots. "I can literally just take whatever they give me, look at it briefly, think the words into my spaceship and then it'll spit out copies. I'll ask for favors though. Like just doing stuff with me if they want to do anything other than write."

"I'm sure the poets society will be ecstatic." Smithee said, his eyerolling practically audible. Seemed he didn't think highly of authors to begin with.

"Bandits and writers, you're sure to make a splash."

"Well they could be useful. The writers that is." Akemi liked how sensible Smithee might be about dirty literary propagandists. "As for the bandits, how would I ever get rid of all of them and even be able to confirm people who asked to join me weren't bandits? Do they all get special tattoos when they graduate from bandit school or something?" If only there was a bandit school.

"Generally you would know them by their slovenly manners, and poor sense of style." Smithee practically sneered.

"Are you gonna think less of me if I recruited bandits?" Akemi asked giving Smithee a serious parental look like he was a father asking his kid if he'd really be a big grumpy baby if he didn't get the toy he wanted at the store. "What if they were sufficiently mannered and stylish? Would you still not want them? Like I don't wanna insult you but you said you were a con artist yourself."

"A gentleman thief, cutting a dashing figure and being of proper manners to all he defrauds is a respected institution in our great society. The talk of all important dinner parties, and one who sets the hearts of ladies aflutter." Smithee explained, sounding quite proud of himself, his tone taking a nosedive to a low grumble as he continued.

"A common thug however is a hindrance at all turns."

"I get you. There's plenty gentlemen thief and detective literature out there and I enjoy it." A thought suddenly occurred to Akemi. "Oh man, I know what I need to do. I'm totally going to get you lots of books and moving picture stories with sound that'll be all about them. Or I will if you'd like that."

"Just so long as it's not poetry..." Smithee sighed, walking over to the door of the sauna and giving it a few knocks. Olena soon stumbled out looking sleepy.

"Oh yeah, of course. Fuck poetry," Akemi replied nonchalantly. "Well most of the time. If you can't read the books will be read aloud by a machine. So where would I go to get me an army of gentlemen thieves instead of bandits?"

"If there were truly an army of us, we would hardly be special now." Smithee said cheekily, watching as Olena haphazardly tossed her towel over Akemi's head and dressed quickly in her normal loose tunic and knee-cut breeches. Done in less than a minute and not bothering to address the mess of her hair. "I suspect you would have to train one."

"Well what I really mean is where would I find people you'd approve of? Also, can you rouse a bunch of trustworthy people to follow you since you're a former knight?" Akemi abruptly put a palm out to stop Smithee from saying a peep. "Before you say anything I gotta say you are totally still a knight in my mind. Fuck anyone saying otherwise. You're my knight in shining armor at the very least."

"The order of the Queen's garter still exists in body, if not in spirit. Some of us went missing, but most still reside within the cities around the Green Sea." Smithee explained, "Although by our own code, the order stopped existing when the Queen died. There are two other orders who may still be contacted, I suppose..."

"Oh man, what are they called?" Akemi perked up greatly at the mention of more knights. "How many members are gentlemen thieves?"

"Queen's Garter, King's Gauntlet, and the order of the Osmani Star." Smithee explained in rapid succession. "Queen's and King's personal guards respectively, and the most distinguished soldiers in the Osman empire."

"Awesome. Sorry I'm asking so much stuff. Another thing I gotta know is is Olena married?" Akemi simply had to ask since she was such perfect wife material to him.

"Noooo..." Olena perked up from her position just outside the changing rooms. "Not married."

"Well the universe sure is blessed that you aren't yet sworn to one man. You're an absolute dream to me." Akemi's lips parted to form a super toothy, ear to ear smile as he turned the woman's way. "Could you ever see yourself hooking up with a little Starman like myself?"

"What would I get?" Olena asked sleepily, as Smithee nodded his head a couple of times. As though he'd already heard this conversation.

"If you named something it'd be yours." Akemi didn't actually intend to marry her but he couldn't resist asking how she felt about him. He had partly hoped he'd get a sick put-down when he inquired. "Oooh! Smithee! What if I said Olena was my paramour or something? Would she be better accepted at a noble party then?"

"If you want bad rumors to follow in your wake." Smithee said with a little wry smile, as Olena gave a rude gesture through the door.

Akemi's eyes danced with glee. The little kitty ran over to the sumptuous saber sensation and purred. "Oh that'd be fantastic! I'd love it Olena! You know I don't mean to imply anything bad about you right buddy? We could say you were my bodyguard, food tester and cupbearer instead if you'd prefer but it'd be super swell if you'd let me get some rumors through you."

Olena swung an arm around Akemi's shoulders, pulling him a bit closer and peering through her long bangs at him for a moment... Before pulling him closer, yanking him into a loose headlock. It obviously wasn't her trying to do an earnest grapple, for sure. She seemed more to be just acting playful. Yet the sheer amount of muscle made it feel like she could just pop his head off if she wanted to.

"Don't get carried away." She said, holding him there and toying with one of his ears.

Akemi immediately started flicking his velvety ears about to give the lovely lady more to enjoy. At the same time his purring grew even louder. "I'd only be saying any of that so you could fit in easy since you said you didn't want to go. I'd love to have you there. Plus this goes for Smithee too." The Neko did his best to look up from his bent over position. "Would you be alright being known as my man mistress?"

"I don't got nothin' to wear to some hobnob party..." Olena said, growing bored with his ear and just running her fingers through Akemi's hair. Smithee on the other hand seemed amused by the whole thing, covering his mouth and giving an earnest laugh.

"So long as we keep proper form. You turn up with a suitor, we exchange meaningful glances all night. All of it ending with the scandal of your inviting me to dance."

"See? Smithee is game." The svelte imp shook his head back and forth to wiggle his silky hair, then rubbed into Olena's side. "Come on I'll get you whatever clothes you want. I gotta have a lover of each sex for maximum amusement. If you're taking this seriously we could consummate it to make it real."

"Already did that, you weren't so good." Olena teased. Smithee pushing himself into action and heading out of the changing room to head for the tavern proper.

Akemi resisted the urge to say something lewd. "Well then you'll go right? I wouldn't feel safe without my saber master. I'm to go meet Dantratten tailors who will outfit me for the occasion. You can totally go too."

"Sure. That'll go down well." Olena let loose the headlock, instead settling for reaching down to grab Akemi and throw him over her shoulder like a firefighter. Presenting his backside to the room as she walked along following Smithee into the Cockpit's main floor. Things were busy again, some men's division fight going on in the pits, although strangely very few seemed interested in the match.

"Great." Akemi answered swiftly. "So, whatcha gonna do with me?" He didn't mind the slightest bit that she was treating him like a sack of potatoes. It was actually an awful strong turn on, especially after that stare she gave him a while ago. Maybe she was only setting him up for humiliation but he always wanted to be a good sport and figured he wouldn't fight what he currently enjoyed.

As Smithee went about busying himself with work; Olena walked across the room, plonking Akemi down in one of the booths and sidling in alongside him to trap him in there. The same tactics she'd used on the day they met.

"Nothin' special." She said, maybe disappointingly. "If yer game, then what's the fun in givin' you what ya want?"

"Yeah, I get what you mean." Akemi decided he'd take the moment of intimacy to really do his best to try to help his pal out. "Seriously buddy," he said as he leaned forward to show his earnestness, "I hope you don't actually worry about fitting in with anyone. You're beautiful as you are. In your case the woman makes the clothes, not the other way around. And really, I'd rather wear you than anything those tailors could offer me. You're crazy cute and sexy too. Plus I'm sure you got plenty of brains when you can fight as well you do. Brains and virtue."

Olena leaned in closer to Akemi, once again putting an arm against him, and beginning to press him up against the wall. Leaning in close to his ear, she gave a husky chuckle.

"You got no idea how I think, do y'?"

"Well I'd love to learn. I'd love to learn all about you. Anything I'd do for Smithee I'd for you and if you ever want me to ask you a million questions just say so. I'm sure you know plenty and you're plenty interesting." As Akemi spoke he looked ahead at the table. Sure what Olena was doing was plenty stimulating and maybe he was making himself look like a wimp or ruining the mood by not returning her physicality but he had something important to try to accomplish here. He needed to make sure that she knew she was very valued. Even if Olena was the last person to need confidence boosting he still felt the words needed to be said to make things clear.

As it came about, the look on Olena's face wasn't so much amorous, as it was slightly annoyed. A little frown underneath her thick hair, before smiling. Her shoulders bobbing up and down with a silent internal laugh that got trapped in her ribcage, left bouncing around without a whisper of amusement escaping her lips.

Raising up a scarred hand, she bent a finger, anchoring it in place with her thumb to build tension before letting it loose to flick Akemi roughly on the side of his head. "Not that innerested." She said, "Learnin' alls about me earned a price tag jus' now."

Akemi turned to meet brawny brawler's gaze and slipped an arm around her back. "Damn, well what's your price?" he asked with a smile. "What kinda payment do you accept?"

"Fifty monies a question." Olena rapped her knuckles on the tabletop a couple of times.

"Oh, well that's a steal," the Neko answered with an easy voice. "And maybe with your earnings from me you'll spend a little less time in the ring and I won't have to worry so much about losing a lovely lady friend. I just gotta figure out where to start."

Olena gave a little snort at the prospect of not going into the ring. Although she didn't seem to elaborate on it, since that sort of information was worth money now...

"Take ya time."

"Am I your type at all or am I just a pretty face and a fat coin purse?" With all the close contact between them Akemi had to gamble on asking such a question. He figured it shouldn't offend as he made sure to speak in a playful manner and reasoned Olena was made of sturdier stuff given her line of business.

Olena just looked Akemi in the eye and answered him flatly, "Yes."

She held out a hand... Seemed that of the two of Akemi's associates, she was the half which was more willing to gouge him for profit.

"Aaah! You meanie! Yes to the first part or the second part or both?" Akemi couldn't really complain. He loved the idea of being milked dry one way or another. With his free hand he fished out some paper money to give her.

Olena snatched the money in a fist, holding up one finger and pointed across the room to pretty, effeminate Smithee. Then back to pretty, effeminate Akemi. Then back to Smithee, then to Akemi. Each time going faster between them. Each time closer to putting two and two together before they finally collided and the fist opened up again, demanding more money.

"Whooh." Akemi wiped a sheet of invisible sweat away with his forearm. "Thank goodness. That's a relief. Then again he's wealthy too." He took out a single Arcmark and placed it in her hand. "Well anyway, man, I don't want to ask you boring questions. Sorry if I do. What would you like me to spend my time on on this planet? Got anything you'd like to see me do?"

"Whatever you like." Olena said, one finger rising up as she added her new banknote to a pile in front of her. A second rising as she moved her empty palm to Akemi and added "A backflip."

"Sure." Akemi retrieved and proffered another fifty. "I'm gonna run out of cash on hand at this rate buddy, but you know I'm good for it though. Hmm. I mean do you have anything you'd like from me? Like you just gotta ask. Also, how do you feel about me wanting to start up my own country or whatever?"

"Yes." Olena grinned, seeming to like the 'do you' questions. Another finger going up to keep count. "Don't care, dick in charge don't change nothin' for anyone below their arse onna chair."

Akemi tossed another two Arcmarks out. "You're gonna be crazy rich when we're done. I hope you spend some of the money in here. Tell me something I don't already know about Sadie. Would you ever have a hot threesome with her? I bet you'd look marvelous in a bowler hat by the way."

"No." Was about all Olena said, answering the only actual question in there. She took up her pile of money and neatly stacked it. Tapping it on the tabletop to get all the bills straightened out.

"Awww. Why not?" Akemi mentally called a Neko waitress over to throw a bunch of bills on the table in advance.

"Not in to girls." Olena said simply, counting her money pile.

"What kinda guy does she like?" Akemi didn't want to bore her with questions about who liked what and sexuality but he couldn't help himself. He barely knew anything about Sadie. That was something he needed to rectify.

"None." Olena chirped.

"So she's gay?" Akemi smiled hard causing his cheeks to protrude as much as they could. "Aw man, that's a shame for me but a boon for you. You should totally see how she feels about you. She might be super into you and you might really enjoy her company. I mean have you ever tried dating another girl?"

"She's... I don' know." Olena actually gave her most detailed answer, maybe it was the giant pile of money motivating her? "Never seen 'er with anyone. And no, I haven't. Not interested."

"Fuck, I hope she doesn't have a tragic past." Akemi really hoped Sadie wasn't some chick whose husband died and felt she'd never love again or something. "Well now that I've got that out of the way, I gotta try to get more value out of my questions. What's your life story?" He was quite eager to see how Olena would condense her history for maximum torment.

"Unwritten." Olena said, clamming back up at a question with a long answer.

"Damn. Now I really want to chronicle the shit out of you." Akemi retracted the arm across the woman's back and folded his arms. "Got any questions for me? I'm tempted to pay you fifty for every question you ask I feel like answering."

"Can you roll your tongue?" Olena asked simply, resting her chin in her shredded palm and grinning. Leaning against the table.

"Sure buddy." Akemi rolled his tongue into a tube, then rolled it backwards. "I don't know if that's what you wanted but we've got a lot of bodily control."

"Left or right handed?" She asked, keeping up the pace.

Akemi chuckled at how easy he was. "I'm ambidextrous but I prefer using my right hand."

"What is the air-speed velocity of a hungry Greater Osmani Drop Bear?" Olena asked snappily.

Akemi shook his head. "I got no fuckin' idea. I think I saw a girl of my kind eat one up in the mountains though."

"Boo." Olena looked mock disappointed for a second.... Before going quiet, and getting something like a serious expression under her bangs.

"Do you love Smithee?"

Akemi was very pleased with the question but he didn't smile. This was something serious for him. "Well I don't think we've known each other long enough to really love each other but I want to love you and him and I think I'm well on my way to that. That's why I try to show how much I care all the time. I'm not just gonna ditch you guys if I hit it off with some noble that runs an entire city or state or whatever."

Olena twisted her hand around under her chin, keeping her fingers over her mouth as if to keep herself from running her mouth off.

"And you want me to date Sadie despite tha'? This some weird space thing?"

"Well if I can love multiple people it's only fair you can too." Akemi lowered his arms, then raised his hands in a shrug. "If I can love you and Smithee and you can love him and potentially me why couldn't either of us add a third person to the list? Besides, you could just be good friends, sex friends, whatever. Where I come from polyamory is common. Heck, so is incest. That doesn't mean I don't take relationships seriously though. I also wouldn't want you doing anything you don't want to do."

Olena shifted in her seat, turning to look over her shoulder towards the bar and shouting "Sadie! You want to date me?"

The barkeep for her part kept filling a drink. Yelling a flat "Nope."

Olena just looked to Akemi and swept a hand out to indicate the barkeep's rejection.

Akemi leaned out from his little containment area and called out. "Wanna fuck 'er?" A big stupid grin was plastered on his face immediately afterwards.

"Nope." Sadie shouted over a patron's head, causing them to startle and lose their hat.

Akemi clicked his tongue. "That sucks. Well you sure took my sharing about space relations in good stride. Got any other queries?"

"Are you wearing some kinda human mask?" Olena asked, with a tone that was humorous, but not entirely joking.

"Naw, what you see is what you get. Go ahead and grab my face to make certain. I could always use a machine to change how I look though. Like I told Corgan I used to be a girl." Akemi wondered if Smithee and Olena had managed to hear that earlier.

"Do you have different insides?" Olena asked morbidly, sounding like she wanted to actually see. Whatever was going on in her head had no room for gender identity questions.

"Hmmm." Akemi thought this was a good one. "Part of me doesn't want to tell you because if we keep ourselves mysterious we maintain an edge and I don't want to increase the odds of people feeling comfortable trying to kill me. But, since you're my paramour now I'll tell you I don't have a heart. That's basically it."

Olena daintily put a gnarled hand to her mouth, looking mock-affected.

"Is it because you gave it to me?"

"Well I'd love to say yes. I'll give you mine as long as you don't mind sharing it but I literally don't have a flesh and blood heart. You can check if you want." The Neko really hoped she'd check.

Olena ducked a little low, reaching under the table and unsheathing what looked like a hunting knife from her boot. Holding it blade down in a clenched fist, she embedded it into the table. "Y'sure?"

Akemi crossed his arms once more as if to protect his chest. "I could make myself not feel pain and I could survive you putting your hand in my chest and looking around but I'd rather you not. I was more thinking you'd put your hand on my chest and notice my pulse isn't any louder where you'd expect a heart. On the other hand I really was also hoping you'd pull out a knife or something as I figured that could be pretty amusing."

"Well worst case is you die, and we sell your body to those guys who think eating an alien will give you their powers." Olena gave a little shrug with a cheeky grin, leaving the knife upright in the table.

Akemi eyed the knife to see if it had any neat ornamentation. "Well how about you not and just ask something else? By the way, since I'm super super nice and you're my beloved paramour I'll tell you even if you killed me I can come right back. At least in a sense."

Olena's knife was nothing fancy. A chunk of sharpened steel, notched and scraped from what looked like parrying other blades in a fight. The handle being a simple wooden cylinder wrapped with what looked like dog-leather. She rocked it back and forth to dislodge it from the tabletop and raised an eyebrow at Akemi mentioning his ability to return from the dead.

"That's... Innerestin'..." Olena said ominously.

"You're interesting," Akemi said, having decided to move on to another more productive topic of discussion. "Got any swell people you think I should meet now that I've got my sights set on Tolmasch and I'm looking to grow this tavern business? Any good friends? I mean I imagine as a champion of two kinds of combat you gotta have met some other interesting, talented and capable people."

Olena narrowed her eyes, as if disappointed that Akemi wasn't game to show her his powers over life and death. Maybe understandable. She tucked one knee up to her chest as she slid the knife back in her boot.

"Yeah, me 'em. Most were pricks."

"Bummer." As Akemi thought about what to say next a light bulb went off in his head and he rose to call to the head bartender again. "Hey Sadie, would you be into Olena if you were a guy? She's so strong I bet her vag has enough grip to press coins." He just had to see how Olena would respond to such a compliment.

"Never been a guy." Sadie shouted, her tone indicating she was busy. Because she was. "But probably not."

Olena for her part just rolled her eyes, treating Akemi to a backhand slap to the chest strong enough to knock the wind out of lesser beings.

Akemi smiled through Olena's blow and the coughing it caused. "You're a good sport," he said turning to the sword master for a moment before addressing Sadie again. "What if she were one? I wanna get you in on what I've got going with her and Smithee."

"No dice." Sadie sent across the bar. "Not you, not Smithee, not Olena, an' no one else in the bar. Not in any combination of positions or tackle in the breeches."

"Maaan, that bites," the Neko said as he plopped back into his seat. "I couldn't resist praising you how I did buddy. It's only because I wanna have fun with you. I was kinda hoping us tavern people could all be like a family and live here and Rennie could be our kid."

"Most of us already got families an' such. Sadie goes home at night an' don't talk to most." Olena explained.

"So what's Rennie to you besides your physician?" Akemi asked wanting to see if there was any familial attachment between her and the little lass.

Olena blinked a few times.

"She... Sometimes cuts m' hair...?" She said uncertainly, clearly not sure what Akemi was getting at.

"I was wondering if the two of you were close since she's so young yet you put your life in her hands," Akemi explained naturally. "I figured it was possible she might be like a sister or daughter to you."

"I pay 'er." Olena said, "An' she's cheap. Tha's about it."

"Dang!" Akemi cried. "I'd want to be a heck of a lot closer to someone that young if I were you and they were treating me. Well actually I guess could trust some little girl because I'm a sucker for cute ones. Like who wants some skinny old bald guy tending to them?"

"If he's a doctor? Lotsa people in th' pit." Olena gave a little laugh, like the idea was a bit ridiculous.

"So, what'll you spend all the cash you got during our question session on?" Akemi wondered if Olena would secretly want to buy herself nicer clothes after all the effort he put into getting her to say she'd attend his noble get together. He thought that was unlikely but he felt it'd be super sweet if that was the motivation behind her charging him for questions.

Olena gave a shrug. Taking up her pile of cash and rolling it into a tight scroll of money. "Save it for a windy day, I suppose."

"Awww, that's boring. The only winds you'll experience with me will be pleasant ones. Everything is gonna be smooth sailing from now on." Akemi paused for a moment then casually revealed something that'd been on his mind for a while. "I gotta say I'm wanting to diddle you silly and endlessly ask you if what I do feels good and if so how good so you can get even more out of me." As he spoke he looked straight into Olena's eyes with a simple smile.

"You aren' always gonna be 'round." Olena said quite seriously. Even knowingly, like she spoke from experience. "Gotta have somethin' for when... I guess if y'can't die, ya get buried alive forever."

Whatever her thoughts were on sex with him right now they seemed to be far from the forefront of her mind.

"What's with the gloomy attitude? What makes you think I'm gonna be the first one to bite the dust?" The Neko could easily answer the latter question considering the riskiness of the things he planned to do but he wanted to know precisely what she was thinking.

Olena stood up, releasing Akemi from his boxed in position in the corner of the booth. Sticking her roll of bills into a back pocket.

"Smithee an' you ain't m' first. Yer gettin' darin', an' darin' gets y' killed." Olena explained, "Smithee ain't got th' stomach to take this big, an' you don't seem so smart. Y' even pissed off big'un in th' sauna. Greedy an' darin' ain't a smart combination."

Akemi likewise stood intending to follow Olena wherever she went. As he got up he took what bills were left and subsequently stacked them neatly before handing them to the woman. "Well you've got a point but on the other hand fuck the big 'un." Akemi loved the way she said that. "He's a normal like you. I coulda killed him easy right then and there. Besides it's a big planet and there's more than enough for all of us. Plus I was the one telling him I could kill 'im, not the other way around. If he did give me trouble he'd be gettin' some of his own hence why he eased off."

"Ya eat, sleep, drink an' fuck like any other man." Olena said grimly. "Sooner or later y'won't notice someone with a gun t'yer back."

"Buddy," Akemi said raising two upturned palms, "I can make another of myself to watch my back if I want to. I could make a bunch of me. I can also make you guys like me too so you wouldn't have to worry about dying or at least not so much."

"Right. Yer not gonna lose never." Olena scoffed, "Just watch ya back, an unshift yer head from yer own nethers."

Akemi didn't feel a need to address her worries right away. "Well I'm glad you've got concern for me buddy even if it might be mostly concern for yourself. I'm glad you're speaking up and giving me your opinion too. Speak your mind whenever you want."

Olena gave a little sigh, pulling up the bottom hem of her tunic and sticking her cut up hands in her pockets and turning to walk for the door out. "Sure. I'll do tha'."

"Buddy," Akemi said as he moved to keep by her side. He was determined not to let their conversation end in such a lousy seeming way. "I think about how things could go badly all the time. Like any time I think about going some place where I could run into hostility I worry about meeting people armed with space weapons or space men who are just as capable as myself. I worry about having no one I can trust and that worry extends to you and Smithee. Things only went the way they did with the big 'un because I wanted to do something nice for our pal." He was now determined to use Corgan's name as little as possible around Olena. "I'm not gonna go picking fights with my fellow star guys willy nilly."

"Yer in a den a' leeches," Olena said, opening the front door and holding up a hand. Her eyes adapting to the light outside, before she turned to move down the street. Sun beating down on her.

"An' you starmen ain't invincible. You lost a lotta men durin' th' storm, an' jus' keep aimin' fer bigger, makin' enemies o' ev'ryone." She spoke over her shoulder, weaving her way down the roads of the city. The University was practically deserted these days, though. The only people here seemed to be going to or from the Cockpit. "It were fine when me an' Smithee jus' kept low an' carved out a little bit o' profit all th' time, wi' th' Kingsmen none th' wiser. B'now yer rallyin' knight armies, an' aimin' fer a crown?"

"You're totally right but you gotta chillax a little," Akemi replied as he began to float to easily keep pace with Olena. "I've barely done anything yet. I just added a bunch of stuff to the tavern and now I'm gathering information and seeing what I've got to work with. I've thought about simply taking it easy with you guys and sticking largely to buying and setting up more taverns. I just think I could do more and have fun doing it. What's this about a death storm?"

"Ev'ry few years or so, a storm would get strong 'nough to crest th' mountains to th' south o' th' city." Olena explained, "City's so big because th' storms wouldn't hit i' most o' th' time. Last time it happened, King Lewis trapped y' alien friends in th' palace, set it alight an' hit i' with cannons. Ya Sheriff strung up th' Prince, causin' a riot durin' th' storm. Lotta spaceman weaponry turn'd up on th' sand market after that. Ya then blew up th' mountain fer some reason, so th' city's days're numbered. We'll be buried inna next storm."

"Well I had nothing to do with any of that and you don't have to worry one bit about a storm tearing this place up if you really want it to stay standing," Akemi assured. "I can totally have a giant storm wall built or something. I guarantee I can make some kind of barrier that'll protect the city better than any mountain can. I just need to be told about these things and I can fix 'em. It might sound arrogant but I swear there's a way. It's only a matter of time and cost."

"Arright, go build a mountain then." Olena said, turning down a side alley half filled with sand, expertly clambering over it.

Akemi really liked that he had an issue he could sink his teeth into and explain away even though Olena might not believe anything until she saw it for herself. "I don't even necessarily need to build a barrier. There might be something I can hit the storm with that'll either greatly weaken or redirect it away from here. What would really help is if I actually saw one in action so I'd have an idea of what I had to prepare against. We've got machines that could figure that out for us though. The thing is, how much do you actually care about this city? I bet I could pluck the Cockpit out of the ground and move it somewhere else."

"'s a best place on the planet." Olena explained, crossing the alley and turning down into another street, "An' th' planet's shit. Not tha' anywhere else ou' there seem'd much brighter."

"Mind telling me where you're going?" Akemi had other things to ask but he thought it wise to learn where he was headed first.

"Shoppin'." Olena said, continuing her trot trough the streets.

Upon hearing Olena's answer Akemi started to wonder what to get his native pals and what would be good to try selling the populace in general. He really wanted to find out what they most valued on their planet and what cheap commonplace space things would sell like hot cakes. "What for? If you've got any star stuff you're interested in go ahead and tell me and I'll see what I can do."

"Crop stuff sells, an' keeps. Bullets're worth more'n gold an' indigo ever was. Tools, tools're good." Olena explained, heading along a somewhat busier cobblestone road planted with wind-flayed bloodwood trees.

"Do you guys have anything really pleasant to wipe your butts with?" Akemi asked. He had a hunch he could make a mint selling toilet paper.

"Yeah, we do." Olena said, keeping on walking with hands in her pockets.

"Whatever it is I bet it's nothing compared to what us star people have," Akemi said as he carefully took in his surroundings. "I'm gonna make sure you have an endless supply of the best stuff plus fantastic perfume and soap. I bet I can make a lot selling the stuff. What I'd really like is to get you wearing some armor that's probably as comfortable as what you're wearing and tougher than anything native to this planet. What I worry most about is you and Smithee."

"Armor? Really?" Olena gave a laugh, sounding faintly like a raspy cough. "Yes, let's all be fancy parade guys..."

"Oh no, it's really subtle," Akemi quickly assured. "You won't draw lots of attention to yourself. It's basically really tough clothing. I just don't want you to have to worry as much about randomly getting shot or stabbed. I need to get you two really well armed so if you ever encounter trouble you can just blast a giant hole in each of your attackers in a few seconds, maybe even multiple ones at the same time. That'd be fucking awesome."

"An' who's attackin' me now? I can prob'ly beat ass a' anyone who gets in th' way."

Akemi smiled wide. He loved her confidence and amusing accent. "I absolutely believe you I just want you to promise me you'll carry around some star protection just in case. You can never be too careful. You can think of doing it for me because I'm a big worrywart pussy and not because you need it."

"Sounds like y' jus' wanna play dress up, t'be onnest." Olena grumbled.

"Oh I totally do," Akemi readily admitted. Her little grumble was music to his ears and made him want to pick the woman up in a big hug. "I would love to dress you up in all sorts of things and I'd remove some scars for you whenever you wanted, not that I don't already like you as you are. The stuff could be really thin and concealable so you could wear what you normally wear over it. I could make sure the part that touches your skin is nice and soft. The materials already have anti-sweat qualities."

"I'll give y' th' same deal as Smithee. Y'get t'choose one outfit." Olena sighed, "I prob'ly won't wear it."

Akemi found himself incredibly attracted by Olena's response. It was like something straight out of a high quality Yamataian cartoon. "Oh man you are priceless. You're more precious than any gem or metal this planet could possibly have. You'll wear something to keep you safe under your regular clothes too right? If not, I'm totally accompanying you everywhere on this shopping trip regardless of whether or not you mind."

"Sure..." Olena grumbled, as they came out into the open square... In front of the Courthouse. The ruined trees with a few more bodies strung up in them, the shattered statue of justice on the front steps used as seating. A line of people waiting at the door to get in. Olena herself marching up and taking her place at the back.

Seeing the courthouse Akemi naturally started to get concerned. "What the heck are you gonna buy here? Some discount clothes off of dead people?" He was pretty interested in what she'd get but her dealing with Arccos was one of his fears. Hopefully she wouldn't be speaking with her directly or he'd find they were on decent terms.

"You don't pay attention t' yer competition, do ya?" Olena sighed.

"Well go ahead and fill me in," Akemi replied. He wasn't really bothered but he did think being given a bit of a break was something to consider if she knew what his relationship with Arccos was. "You gotta remember I came after everyone else got down here so I'm still learning about everyone and everything."

"Only other place y'can buy space stuff is here." Olena said, not expanding much on her statement.

"Well I guess I gotta stay in line with you to make sure you stay safe. I don't want to risk you ending up like those people on the tree." Of course the thought occurred to Akemi that staying by Olena's side might be the worst thing to do to ensure she stayed out of trouble considering the Sheriff might decide to give her grief for associating with him. "Are you on good terms with any of Arccos' people?"

"Yeah, lottuvem bet on my fights." Olena explains, "An' I din't do nothin' wrong, so I'm not gonna be slung up onna tree."

"Well I had a real bad first encounter with the Sheriff so she might consider me being your bud a problem," Akemi confessed. He always wanted to be an honest and open guy when he could. Sometimes it got him into some very amusing situations. "I hope you never let her lure you away from me. Anything she does to win you over could just be to spite me and you can always be buds with both of us."

"I'll make a note t' go be 'er friend if y'ever piss me off." Olena said, as the line shortened slightly.

Akemi sighed softly. "I figured you'd say that but I hope you take my full disclosure seriously as a sign I really want to do right by you as I wouldn't trust her to be as forthcoming with stuff if it didn't suit her purposes."

"Or if I ever jus' wanna watch you squirm..." Olena kept on talking to herself thoughtfully.

The Neko instantly grinned from ear to ear. "Oh come on now buddy, you totally already knew how to make me squirm and I love it. I just hope you stick with me long enough to see me do something more than that that might impress you into staying by me."

"I'unno. That Sheriff just has ways about her." Olena said, clearly joking.

"I'd sure give her a go any day," Akemi said freely. "Anyway, I gotta get you and Smithee to tell me all about Tolmasch. It'd be real nice to know of any big names like a mayor or some kind of community leader who could tell me who needs killing to make the place a little better off. Heck, I dunno even know how big it is and where it starts and ends."

"Tolmash is a country." Olena said, tapping her foot as she waited in line, "'s gotta whole buncha towns, an' mayors, an' a couple cities wi' lords or wha'ever."

"Oh man, that's good. I gave the big 'un grief over a whole country." Akemi's gleeful, fanged smile made it clear he loved it. "Is there any particular town or city known for being better off than the others law and order wise? It'd be nice to set up a tavern fortress somewhere and start my campaign from there."

"None who lived in Osman went down there for years. Dunno what 'appened to it after th' Grant Rebellion took it over." Olena said, taking a few steps forward, getting closer to the door.

Akemi furiously rubbed his hands together like a maniacal merchant. "That's fucking awesome. I get to try taking a super mysterious place for a guy who is in such deep hiding we don't know if he's simply dead. This is like something right out of one of my space books. Are you a reader?" The Neko thought about asking her if she could read but he was worried that might sound rude. Of course he knew on this world it might be a much more legitimate question than in most places he'd been.

"Nah. Books're too expensive." Olena said, taking another few steps towards the front door. "Pretty borin' too."

"Yeah. That's true. Why read about a sword master when I can just chat with her right here? Still, I'll get you any literature you'd be interested in." Once more defense of Akemi's buddies sprang to the forefront of his mind. "I gotta say I'm glad you live with Smithee and I so we're all in one place. Oh, does Sadie have any fighting experience? I really need to get her a great space weapon she can use if anyone tries to fuck with our business. I plan on making the whole thing into a fortress. I just need people I can trust with space guns." The little man figured if he started trouble for bandits in Tolmasch they might try to come after his pals so they needed to be protected as well as possible.

"Not gonna find many you can trust." Olena explained, "Armies got nothin' t'fight for anymore, so most went back t'the gangs. Kings kept soldiers in line wi' th' protection an' feedin' a' family back home. Now ev'ryone's scramblin' over new stuff."

"So how big and official like do these gangs get?" Akemi asked. "Could I literally walk up to some gang office and ask to book an appointment with the manager so I could see about hiring his henchmen?" While he waited for an answer he took a look around to see how spooky their surroundings were besides the hanging tree. Would he see guards or traders equally ominous?

"Some're fancy, some ain't. Depends on where they from." Olena said, filing past the front doors and into the lobby of the courthouse. The guards were mostly locals, armed with weapons from space and wearing dark green ponchos painted with six pointed stars. Styrling armor. Most of them seemed friendly enough to the locals, though.

Things were more in functional disarray than much else. Inside, there was an entire crowd sitting on the upturned benches of the high courts, now without locking doors. The place looked more like a feasting hall than an office of law. Although despite all this, there seemed to only be one place to buy anything, with a few Brigadiers working the desk by what seemed to be the old cells under the courthouse. Retrieving space goods and trading for Arcmarks. The only trade going on was done directly between the Brigade and the people.

Akemi was pretty pleased to see how nice everything looked. He definitely needed to try seriously calling upon Olena's contacts within the Brigrade if he found a use for them. "What would you say Osman city is like crime wise compared to the others? Do you only feel safe walking down the streets because you're so tough?"

"Well. As much as people moan, street crime's gone right down." Olena explained, "Gangs stopped stealin' once they worked out th' only thing worth havin' were space things, an' only turn up t' go fer folks when they got a big advantage. Heard one gang got taken out fer stealin' from some space captain or somethin' other day, but none're able t' get same control as b'fore."

"Outside Osman? Dunno, not been there inna while..."

"Well if you ever wanna visit somewhere we could." The Neko figured a good trip would be a great change of atmosphere for his pals and it'd be a wonderful opportunity for him to learn and his buds to get to casually show off what they knew without him constantly questioning them. "We could just explore the wilderness or go to another planet. I can show you so much plant life that isn't Algaeia you'll wish you were back here. Just say the word."

"Where'd I go? Some other place where ev'ryone's a smartass an' treats me like a dumb kid?" Olena said, finally reaching the front of the cue. Being handed a datapad by a Brigadier which she started scrolling through what looked like a catalog.

"Do people really do that? I'm sorry if it ever seems like I do," Akemi said feeling worried his assuring her she was valued came off as insulting. While Olena browsed the pad he tried to see if he could mentally slurp up whatever information it had. He also tried seeing if he could grab info from other nearby machines if could find any.

Whatever was on the pads, it seemed that they'd manually had their wireless capabilities removed. No networking at all. The only available machine interfaces which were open seemed to be a few mindware connections, and a single polysentience node.

"All the time. Jus' about everything y' say sounds like 'blah blah bluh blah, daddy knows best'." Olena sighed, adding a few things to her shopping cart.

"I just don't want you to die," Akemi said emphatically. "That's all. I only met you a little while ago and you have super dangerous fights all the time. I only wanna make sure you get to relax and feel safe or at least safer outside of the ring. If the roles were reversed I think I'd be alright with it. Whatever the case I'm sorry pal."

"Funny how I'm not dead." Olena said, sounding a little surly. "We did just fine 'til you spacemen turn up, make things more dangerous, an' now we're 'sposed t' drool over ya since y' can half solve a problem ya cause."

To a degree Akemi actually enjoyed Olena's attitude. "Well hey, I'm not asking you to drool over me though that would be fantastic. I also don't think I'm like your dad although I'd love to have you as a daughter. I haven't caused anything yet except people to have more and better food and drink. I'm only looking to make you safer than you've ever been as I can live forever unless I'm killed and I could make you the same."

"Go on, then." Olena said, sounding a little testy, "Sounds a bit cheap t'me, but I'll believe it when I see it."

"Well the thing is how would I prove it to you?" Akemi asked. "You'd need to live several years without aging for me to prove it. If you find me someone old you'd like me to return to what they were in their youth I'll do it."

"Snake oiler." Olena sighed. Knowing full well that there were not many elderly on this world.

The Neko found the accusation a bit cute but at the same time it annoyed him that it might be serious. "If I made it so you could fly or regrow an arm would that do it for you?"

"Go on, then." Once more Olena remained suspicious. Handing over the datapad.

"Gosh I can't simply wave a magic wand or chant some words." Akemi worried about giving his buds powers like him but part of him thought it would be neat and figured it'd go a long way to making them safer. "It'd take some time. If I do it you gotta promise me you aren't gonna run off and abandon me at a moment's notice. That probably sounds wimpy but that's what worries me."

"Sure. Go get your spooky shrouds or whatever..." Olena snickered, as a Brigadier returned with a wooden create, handing it over.

Akemi smiled at the sound of the woman's laugh. He always loved to amuse her and Smithee. Any laughter at his expense was generally fine with him since he figured he owed them something for putting up with all his questions and each instance of it was an opportunity to show he was a good sport. "Shrouds? Well I'm glad you have a laugh here and there so even with me being your space dad it isn't all that bad. The idea is actually really growing on me."