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  • 📅 December 2024 is YE 46.9 in the RP.

Approved Character [DION] John Karrelik

So, there's several issues I have with this character. I'll list them in no particular order.

First, considering the social circles he moves in, how on earth does he generate any attention if he's a quiet figure? What rumors or reputation does (or even, can) he have with such a wallflower personality? I'm from a well to do family, have attended large 100-200+ parties and no family scion is really rewarded for being so bland. It's a large disconnect, which I don't understand.

Considering his age and social status, I'm curious to know why he enlisted at age 25. Most enlisted Marines are late teens, early twenties, usually as an attempt to escape gang-warfare or send money home or just out of sheer, bloody patriotism. Any older usually means an extenuating circumstance. That was before independence so his original enlistment would be with the Star Army of Yamatai. And why he needs money if dad pays for his fancy tech.

Then enlisted at 25. Currently 32. What's he been doing for 7 years as a Santo-hei/P3C? Most characters get promoted by their second combat mission. It's very hard to remain as P3C for 7 years.

I don't allow starter characters to be a sniper. Without knowing their style, it could end very badly. Too much has been done that romanticizes sniping so its not a risk I'm willing to take. Also, most combat in 4th Fleet is CQB. If you're shooting at long-ranges (50m+), you're depending on the power armor's systems more than any real skill. Then there's also the fact that your average power armor weapon has the same (or greater) range as a modern anti-materiel rifle.

which he has grown used to exploiting. As such, John can manipulate non-hostiles if he has to by deliberately causing and exploiting awkward situations.
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This makes him sound like a weasel. Which makes me think this may cause hostility towards the character as there are a lot of straight-shooting Marines in 4th Fleet.

Overall, I think this character is trying to be more than a starting character but missing all of the essential pieces to justify being more than a starting character. History doesn't add up. Personality and background are just odd. It's a good start but it doesn't sound Nepleslian to me.

Character mods, please feel free to chime in with your own suggestions.
 
So general consensus is that I should try a simpler character. Is it as simple as "Don't be a weasel, don't be a sniper, be consistent with backstory" or am I missing something important?

I suppose I was going to romanticize sniping somewhat, although I could argue that warfare as a concept is romanticized to one degree or another on this forum. I suppose I'll just start out under a different name, because I quite like that one and I want to use it for a character I can empathize with. I might just scrap this one and wait until I'm far enough along in the OOC ranks to use it. Is that acceptable, or would you rather I just adapted him to starting parameters?

EDIT: With all due respect, is it really a problem if my guy appears to be a weasel? Couldn't that just be another plot point?
 
Just wandering through and I know I ain't a GM or anything of the sort but since when is 50 meters considered long range? I mean I personally can accurately engage a target with a 9mm pistol from 50 meters away and with a rifle I can engage at over 500 meters. I would think that a military force even in the future would train their troops to at least that standard. Even personal protection pistols currently can hit at 50 meters even with an inexperienced shooter.
 
I'm not entirely sure why Sigma has such a huge problem with this, but as far as I can see, there's only really a few things, most of which he pointed out already:

1: It is very odd that he'd be in the military for Seven years and not advance. I would suggest making him younger and have him be fairly fresh out of basic. He wouldn't be an expert at what he does but that wouldn't stop him being proficient. you can grow him from there.

2: That Humanities skill is a bit out of line. I Understand that it doesn't seem to be something he has a habit of, but I'd prefer to see that skill be replaced with something else. If he is able to do that to people, it would have to be something that happens In Character and would depend on the other characters and players, and not his skill set as written on the Bio.

3: Death in the SARP isn't exactly permanent any more. Yamatai has the Soul Transfer system and Nepleslia uses a cerebral chip, meaning that in a majority of cases, people can be resurrected.


In any case, Welcome to the SARP, And please excuse Sigma's tone, I'm not sure what's been eating him lately. If you have any more questions, feel free to PM me, or pretty much anybody with a green or Yellow name.
 
Wirebobbin said:
EDIT: With all due respect, is it really a problem if my guy appears to be a weasel? Couldn't that just be another plot point?
Click to expand...

As a Nepleslian GM, I would just like to add that there is no problem at all with character's being 'weasels', in this particular case. I, in fact, encourage unique personalities over the standard, and wish you good luck in your chosen plotship, Wire.
 
The character meets all of the standards set forth by the rules of the site. So long as the player is reasonable, any one of us should do fine with him in our plots. With that in mind; if things don't work out in the military, I will be glad to try and find a place for you in my civilian plot, Wire.

I, too, wish you luck and good times in the plot of your choice.

Upon closer inspection of Sigma's post, I feel the need to bring up the fact that my starting character was Vincenzo Bortelli, an openly fiendish scumbag who shamelessly steals from everyone he meets and more recently has betrayed his captain to bounty hunters for some quick cash on the side. Because I am a very conservative player (Indeed, Enzo's most memorable moments are his spectacular failures), the character has become an accepted part of the ISC Phoenix crew.
 
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