Dr.Versh's ClashLand {Nep Bloodsport Gameshow}

The broadcast begins with a flash of static and a garbled roar, revealing a solitary labcoated figure in a pitch black room. The short woman smiles, six individual lenses on her boxy silver helmet focusing in and giving her a far more sinister aura than she had any right to. Soft classical music played just on the edge of hearing, adding a little sugar to her venomous words:

“Good morning, pedestrians. Welcome to the first addition of Dr.Versh’s ClashLand.” She said with controlled enthusiasm. Humorous little white outlines began to appear on the screen to annotate her speech. “Let me explain the rules: After our contestants sign a nice little contract, they are placed within my ClashLand to undergo a series of blood-filled trials of gun-fun. When they reach the very end of the game by passing all of my delicious levels, they stand a chance of winning my entire fortune and even the ClashLand itself, by defeating me in single combat.”

“…But let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves, of course.” She sighed, and sat down onto a tiny armchair on the floor that wasn’t visible before. “There are plenty of armed autonoma and genetically engineered shenanigans that will likely have other ideas! So, let’s meet them on the hidden cam, shall we? I think our little sleepers are just about ready!”

The camera then crudely blipped into another view- This one showing a bright, octagonal room covered in Astroturf and plastic flowers. Among the holographic blue ocean flickering on the walls were eight heavy metal doors, numbered 2 to 9. Lastly (and most obviously to the viewers), multiple contestants lay unconscious on white plastic chairs. Each was dressed in a skintight black leotard, alrough their original clothes were folded out infront of them, as if to give them the option. Additionally, goofy white helmets with fish-eye goggles were placed under the chairs.

“WAKEY WAKEY, YOU DRY SPROUTS!” Dr.Versh yelled through some kind of intercom system, pink stimulant gas now pumping into the room…

OoC:

A bloodsport gameshow similar to the Running Man or a little bit of Saw II. To enter your character, simply RP them waking up. There is a pretty darn large possibility that your character will die, but it IS non-cannon, so don’t worry about it! Also, note that only one character can win…

IPG Initiate Mikhael Chandler hacked harshly, then tilted forward in his chair. His eyes seemed to bug out of his head. However, he somehow managed to stand up. "What the hell?" Noticing the leotard he was wearing, he recovered his IPG uniform and pulled it on over the leotard.

"Where am I...?"

Maat Nevaraon woke with a start. "What the hell?" He glanced around to see one other person was awake. He grunted at him while pulling on his regular clothes. "Do you have any idea where we are?"

A black-haired figure with sideburns, stubble and an oh-so-sexy black leotard was sprawled out on one of the armchairs was beginning to stir.
"Mmmnngh." He said as he began hitting himself in the head, lightly, "I should've taken the red pill."

Once he got to his senses, he found that he was wearing an oh-so-sexy leotard, stretching it a little at the chest, "...What the fuck is this shit?!" He was annoyed that he was wearing such a singular colour which offended his sense of taste. Fortunately, he'd found his normal clothes and tore off his Leotard, exposing hairy legs, arms and chest, and to top it off - a pair of white boxer shorts with a heart pattern.

The audience had a laugh as he tore his leotard off and put his normal clothes back on.
"Ahh... much better..." Luca said as he pulled the collar of his jacket taut and adjusted his nether regions, sitting down again and looking at everyone around him and in the audience. He pulled a lollipop out of his top pocket, unwrapped it and put it in his mouth with a big, cheesy grin.

"Evenin' folks!"

Nevaraon raised his eyebrows at the boxer shorts but didn't saying. "How's it going?" he replied.

"Just dandy!" Luca replied to Nevaron with an inane grin. He wasn't really paying attention to anyone else at this point.

"Any idea what we are doing here?" Nevaraon grinned at this strange alien.

"Y'know -" Luca replied to Nevaraon as he put his pants on and got his boots on, which he'd forgotten to do earlier, "I wouldn't have the foggiest clue. You got any ideas?"

"Well, I hope it isn't a contest of who lives and who dies. Cause that would suck....a lot." Nevaraon replied as he looked around the room.

"GOOD MORNING COOKIE CRUMBS!" A certain squeeky host blaired into the room. The speaker was appearently inside a large fake cartoon squid that was stuck to the ceiling, which had sinisterly appeared out of nowhere.

"Welcome to ClashLand. The rules are simple. Complete the levels and do not die. Bonus weapons will be awarded to those who pull off the coolest stunts." It instructed. "Now, please choose a door from two to nine."

"Cookie Crumbs?" Luca said, "How endearing!"
He got up and looked at the doors. "How come there isn't a Door 1?" He shrugged a bit as he approached Door 7 and leant against it, sucking the lollipop in his mouth thoughtfully.

The door was circular, with a little lever that needed to be pulled right around a track on the outer rim. A thick spring within the track meant it would probally be very hard to keep open once somebody went through it.

"Shooby-doop doop dap deep dap dee-da da-da-da deep da deep da dana." The host rather helpfully scated away whist she waited for them to make a decision.

Chandler sighed, repressing a derogatory comment- though just barely. He merely walked over to door 4 and leaned against the wall.

Nevaraon said "Well, 8 appendages equals my luck. Sooooo..." He walked over to door 8

The host's non-sentient scatting continued as the contestants entered various doors. "Taking a different door each? I'm surprised you blokes didn't go for safety in numbers... GOOD JOB!"

Each door jolted open violently, revealing a disturbingly different room past each threshold.

Luca was blinded by neon lights, the adjoining room being filled with casino slot machines and irritatingly bright signs. It was difficult to see more than a few feet with all the machines stacked on top of each other like Lego, so one could only assume a lot of climbing was involved. Of all the rooms, this was the only one with music blaring out, which just happened to be of the cheesy lounge verity...

Chandler was met with a totally different sight. Cheap styrofoam mountains adorned both sides of a chasm, with considerably more realistic looking holographic mountains surrounding on all sides. The only way across was a wooden bridge, which creaked noisily in the bitterly cold air-conditioner wind.

Lastly Nevaraon was met with something different again. The room was basically large, square and silver, the walls rippling as if they were made of mercury. Pipes and beakers filled with bubbling liquid in a myriad of colours were strewn about the place. There were even a few beakers on the ceiling, with no clues as to why the nasty liquid within was ignoring gravity and staying inside.

Chandler looked around his surroundings. The bridge swaying in the wind looked nowhere near anything he would use to cross anything, but he had no other options. He checked his clothes for any weapons- knives, knuckledusters, even a pistol, if he was lucky.

"We can't be cool if we do it together!" Nevaraon sniped before turning to the strange room in front of him. He patted himself down to see if he had his trusty knife handy. Maybe his service pistol or family longsword. He really couldn't remember if he strapped them on or not. As he did so he used his prehensile tail to pick up a beaker and get a brief whiff of the contents like he learned in high school Chemicial labs.

"Damn that's bright." Luca said as he tried to look into the room, his eyes eventually adjusting to the bright lights and observing his surroundings in more detail, "Slot Machines? Hmm. I've no time to gamble with my life..."

The crowd giggled at his one-liner. He then listened to the music, and it offended his tastes. "Damn this is corny. Anyone reminded of a YE10's silent Hologram film?" He put his hands in the air as though he was addressing the audience.
He jumped up onto one of the slot machines and tried to see what he'd have to do here:
"So - Do I have to find the one that'll pay or somethin'?" He openly asked.

Chandler's pockets contained no weapons, so somebody must have raided them. The host did mention something about bonus weapons, through, so one could assume there were average weapons about somewhere. Examining the terrain, it seemed one end of the rickety wooden bridge was stubbornly staying in place, apparently heavier than the other side...

Nevaraon was no luckier, not a thing in his pockets at all. Picking up the beaker wasn't a brilliant idea either, as the chemicals instantly send a wave of nauseous fumes to his brain. Those yellow and pink bubbles weren’t here a second ago, were they?...

Luca was asking the right questions at least. Upon closer inspection, one could pick out the individual silver slot machines amongst the gold. Each silver machine had a pistol grip sticking out the front instead of a lever, with the red letters "RUN OR GUN" emblazoned on the top in a western font.

Nevaraon giggled slightly as the fumes continued to fuzzle his brain. The yellow and pink bubbles bounced around the strange room. He tried to spin around to follow them but fell down. "What's going on?" He asked aloud to himself as the ceiling soon bounced with yellow and pink bubbles.

(small edit. spelling error.)