Approved Character [Dream World] Mahsa Karim

[Syaoran]

https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=characters:yamatai:mahsa_karim

I don't think her inventory needs much work but she can buy more stuff from the stores if she needs it, considering where she's going. But yeah she's done, I put the abilities of her symbiotics in the skills section.

 

[Syaoran]

@Ametheliana sorry forgot to tag, and not sure if tags work on edits.

 

[Ametheliana]

I don't think it does work on edits. I have a few hours of irl to get through and then I'll review Mahsa! I can't wait to get her started!

 

[Ametheliana]

1) You linked Dream Consort but changed it to Dreamer Consort. Can you make it just Dream Consort?

2) "After struggling witht eh feelings for months..."

3) Says optional section in skills learned, still.

4) "...it was the standard, and it working on her Azorean, but she does not like..." It should be is.

5) Personal Assistant skill can have some parts put into Communication and some parts into Technology, which are more standard.
https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=ccg:iromakuanhe_new#inventory
6) "Iromakuanhe characters begin with a starting sum of 13000 KD by default" She is just under that.

An aside:
"...other benefits." *raises eyebrows and smiles at that*

 

[Syaoran]

Alright fixed the typos, and the optional section thing. Her money is just under 13 thousand cause that was how much it cost to buy her equipment(didn't deduct clothes though, most iroma clothes are homemade according to the fashion article anyway) As for the skills, I can break personal assistant up, but I put it together because of that skill page idea I suggested, so I can just remove that whole section and link to it once the page is up.

 

[Ametheliana]

All of that is fine, good, and nice.

Approved