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Star ArmyⓇ is a landmark of forum roleplaying. Opened in 2002, Star Army is like an internet clubhouse for people who love roleplaying, art, and worldbuilding. Anyone 18 or older may join for free. New members are welcome! Use the "Register" button below.

Note: This is a play-by-post RPG site. If you're looking for the tabletop miniatures wargame "5150: Star Army" instead, see Two Hour Wargames.

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First RP Post

Zakalwe

Zakalwe

Inactive Member
OK, Iv'e posted my first RP type thing in the General Roleplaying Forum. It's not true RP I think, but Rob played the part of GM, even though it is very short. Feedback for it will well apreciated, although where it will go is beyond me. Perhaps in a private message?

I hope to have several other short RP/ stories under the same thread about more of his training before he undertakes his first missions on the behalf of of NovaCorp 😉
 
OK, according to view readings, people have looked at my RP 24 times. Now I realise it may have been of such shockingly bad quality that you couldn't possibly respond, but please (if you feel like it) tell me something here, I need feedback to know where I went wrong (or, less likely, right), what people liked about it or disliked about it.

I honestly don't mind whether people say they don't like it or not, it will just allow me to do better in the future, but please if you have read it (Apeseals training) take a few moments to tell me what you thought.

If you haven't read it and have a free moment, here the link (I know it's not good but I really need feedback to help me improve).

https://stararmy.com/v-web/bulletin/bb/v ... php?t=1022
 
I didn't see anything wrong with it. ^_^;
 
I read it over this weekend. Looks good to me. :)

You even roleplayed Apesael's fighting style correctly. However, the fight scene, to me, looked a bit staged, but that's probably because you guys were going easy on each other, which I actually recommend when you are just starting out with RPs. In any case, it's not unusual and it's completely all right for the results of fights to be agreed upon before hand.

I look forward to more posts from you. :)
 
Thanks. It is true that Apesael completely outclased them, but that is because he is significantly better. In the upcoming duel their should be a closer fight (perhaps), and their certainly will be for the award. Thanks again for your helpful critiscism. :D
 
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