Gumia(Gartagens)

[Ira]

https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=gartagens:gumia

Primary transportation craft.

 

[Nashoba]

I will complete my review on this 4/16

 

[Nashoba]

This review is for: Gumia

The submitted article is/has…
[x] A general topic sentence under the title header
[x] Artwork (illustrations are required for Starships, Vehicles, Hand weapons or Small Arms, Uniforms for military forces or large corporations and new alien species not from the race of the day CCG)
[x] Needed and/or useful to the setting
[x] In the proper format/template
[-] Proofread for spelling and grammar
[x] Easy to read and understand (not a lengthy mass of technobabble)
[-] Wikified (terms that could be a link should be a link)
[x] No red and/or broken links
[-] Reasonably scientifically plausible
[x] Reasonably neutral point of view

The submitted article is/does not…
[x] Overpowered (or cutting tech for a faction with little or no roleplay)
[x] Obtusely redundant
[-] Contain copy pasta descriptions of systems or interior compartments
[x] Unauthorized by faction managers or player-controlled corporation
[x] Contain references to IC events that have not occurred (SM must authorize retcons)
[x] Use second-person language (“you” or “your”) unless it is an instructional guide aimed at players.
[x] Use bombastic language (“virtually immune,” “nearly indestructible,” “insanely powerful,” “horrible effects”)
[x] Use an unbalanced header/text ratio (many headers but sections are one-liners)
[x] Use major unapproved sub-articles that should be submitted separately
[-] Lacking Detail
[x] Images hosted on sites other than stararmy.com (Photobucket, Imageshack, etc are not allowed)

The article has…
[x] Speeds in compliance with the Starship Speed Standard, if applicable
[x] Damage Capacity and Damage Ratings in compliance with the DR Guidelines
[x] The in-character year of creation/manufacture. (Should be current year. Future years not allowed).
[x] The Standard Product Nomenclature System, if applicable.


Summary
Note here if any serious issues are present. These are the issues that will hold up approval.
** Short description of the issue. If a longer explanation is needed, put it in Notes.

[-] Proofread for spelling and grammar
RRF troops - should not use RRF until you have defined it, and it should probably be a link to the reference.

travelling

Gumio, Gimio

[-] Wikified (terms that could be a link should be a link)
See RRF reference

[-] Contain copy pasta descriptions of systems or interior compartments

Second paragraph for the cockpit is verbatim from the Gimio even to the the word Gimio being used. - Recommend removing the text and creating a standard cockpit and linking to it.

[-] Reasonably scientifically plausible
Scramjets can not be used for VTOL, they require the engines to have air forced through them at hypersonic speed. Sitting on the ground they just won't work.

[-] Lacking Detail

Please include the actual speeds instead of Mach 3 which is not useful for the players.

Also, it would be nice to see some sort of emergency equipment onboard in the event it crashes.

Status: Pending

Notes
This field is for any extra description needed for the issues stated above or (as the name suggests) and additional notes you wish to state in the record regarding the item.


I intend to finish this review by: Complete

 

[Ira]

Edited as suggested.

 

[Ira]

and Bump.

 

[Nashoba]

No information is provided on the External mounts as to how the weapons are controlled.

Also the Edjia Guass Rifle shows unapproved.

 

[Ira]

Edited, and submitted rifle for approval.

 

[Wes]

Thank you for following Nashoba's suggestions.

This submission is now Approved.