I remember when I was a kid, how I'd always want to be a police officer for the FCPD. They'd always show those promotional videos and movies on TV and I'd just play along, zapping those criminals with my toy gun. I'd be a hero, I thought. People would love me.
As I grew older, I put those childish fantasies away. I figured the steady paycheck would give me time to think, some food to eat, a place to live. And I was a good shot with a gun and pretty strong too... could stand up long enough against an ID-SOL to call for backup. But when I went through training and those first few years as a rookie, I still thought I could be a hero. People didn't have to love me, but at least they'd know I'd wear the colors of the men and women who risked their lives to protect the people. I'd still be a hero.
Now... I just don't know anymore. I look around and see nothing's changing. Just big talk from the government saying that they'll build a bunch of free hospitals and help with the transportation.
We wouldn't need those hospitals if people weren't getting shot all the time.
And people hardly look at me when I approach. They either ignore me or try to get out of my way. They know when my boys arrive that there's going to be violence. Sometimes the boys just do it because they want to cause a ruckus or get some cash out of it.
After seven years, I'm not a hero... I'm just another gang member parading around like a public servant.
It's not that I don't try my best... but I'm starting to think that my best just isn't good enough. Sitting at this desk, I sometimes think 'I gotta get out of here before it drives me crazy.'
But I can't. I need the money...
...and I still want to help people.
That's good enough for me. That's what a hero is made of.