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Leono Corvette(Gartagens)

I

Ira

Ser Spit
Inactive Member
Submission Type: Civilian Ship
Submission URL: https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=ga ... pace_miner

Faction: Gartagen Union
FM Approved Yet? Yes

For Reviewers:
Contains Unapproved Sub-Articles? No
Previously Submitted? No

Notes: I have often talked about Gartagen mining Operations. I need more civilian ships, and this certainly will put some definition on it. This ship will help support the larger one I just put up for approval.
 
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Update, due to holidays slight delay --

Review In Progress - Will be completed by 12/26
 
Before I post a checklist....

Just some things I noticed:
  • More interior compartments need a description or linked to standard compartments.
  • The robotic grappling arms are not described in systems. How do they work?
  • After the ship cores and breaks apart the asteroid, does it harvest the material? Or does another ship preform this task?

Pending.
 
* The interior compartments that are described on the ship's wiki are all that are on this ship. It is not designed for long term use.
* I am not a roboticist. the arms work via robotics and other such technological masterpieces. I was discouraged from going insane and in depth with redundant technology descriptions. Case and point I was told by the Mod's in the past before you returned not to sweat such petty details.
*The Article states " At the center of these arms is where the ship's coring drill is located, enabling the corvette to latch on to and asteroid, and core it completely, then break it apart for harvesting. " This implies that the crew then harvests the asteroid once it is cored.
 
This review is for: Leono Corvette

The submitted article is/has…
[x] A very high level of overall quality
[x] A general topic sentence under the title header
[x] Artwork (Required for new species; Strongly recommended for vehicles and hand weapons)\\
[x] Needed and/or useful to the setting
[x] In the proper format/template
[x] Proofread for spelling and grammar
[x] Easy to read and understand (not a lengthy mass of technobabble)
[x] Wikified (terms that could be a link should be a link)
[x] No red and/or broken links
[x] Reasonably scientifically plausible
[x] Reasonably neutral point of view

The submitted article is/does not…
[IN COMPLIANCE] Overpowered (or cutting tech for a faction with little or no roleplay)
[IN COMPLIANCE ] Obtusely redundant
[IN COMPLIANCE ] Contain copy pasta descriptions of systems or interior compartments
[IN COMPLIANCE ] Unauthorized by faction managers or player-controlled corporation
[IN COMPLIANCE ] Contain references to IC events that have not occurred (SM must authorize retcons)
[IN COMPLIANCE ] Use second-person language (“you” or “your”) unless it is an instructional guide aimed at players.
[IN COMPLIANCE ] Use bombastic language (“virtually immune,” “nearly indestructible,” “insanely powerful,” “horrible effects”)
[IN COMPLIANCE] Use an unbalanced header/text ratio (many headers but sections are one-liners)
[IN COMPLIANCE] Use major unapproved sub-articles that should be submitted separately
[IN COMPLIANCE] Lacking Detail
[IN COMPLIANCE] Images hosted on sites other than stararmy.com (Photobucket, Imageshack, etc are not allowed)

The article has…
[IN COMPLIANCE] Speeds in compliance with the Starship Speed Standard, if applicable
[IN COMPLIANCE] Damage Capacity and Damage Ratings in compliance with the DR Guidelines
[IN COMPLIANCE] The in-character year of creation/manufacture. (Should be current year. Future years not allowed).
[IN COMPLIANCE] The Standard Product Nomenclature System, if applicable.


Summary
Note here if any serious issues are present. These are the issues that will hold up approval.
**N/A.

Status: Approved.

Notes
I was not asking for a complete run down on how the system works. Just would of been nice to see something general under systems. Ive never expected redundant technology to be explained. xAw

I intend to finish this review by: COMPLETE
 
Thank you for the review, I will probably "Re-submit" this article when I do some better research on robotic limbs(on a large scale like this) and add it to the article.
 
RPG-D RPGfix
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