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Approved Character Lolion Reglo

AWanderingMage

Inactive Member
Name: Reglo, Lolion


General Information

Species: Geshrin/Nepleslian
Gender: Male
Age: 23

Family / Creators: Father: Leroy Reglo (Deceased KIA) Mother: Sukora Gensha (Deceased)

Employer: Star Army of Yamatai
Occupation: Combat Arms Pilot
Rank: Santo Hei
Current Assignment: N/A


Physical Characteristics

Height: 6'1"
Weight: 217lbs / 98.43 Kg.


Build and Skin Colour: Slightly less muscular build than a true Nepesilian, Caucasian with a natural light tan. Because he lived in the desert for so long his tan however is a few shades darker.

Facial Features and Eye Colour: He has a Mature face with a fairly pronounced cheek and jaw bone. He has deep blue eyes.

Hair Colour and Style: Has a light brown hair color that is short with a small amount of spike to it. almost like the backside of a hedgehog.

Distinguishing Features: When he transfered his soul to a Yamatai body he asked for his scar that he had gotten from a wild animal on his planet to be transfered as well. the scar starts above his right eye and travels across his nose and ends on his left cheek.


Psychological Characteristics

Personality:
Lolion is a solitary type of person because of the secluded ness of his home on the planet his father brought him to. He has a fairly conservative approach to his life because of how he grew up and yet also is very prepared for almost everything that he does. This is due to his training life style that his father put him though when he was young and also through is hand to mouth lifestyle at his previous home. He normally doesn’t show emotion because of his fathers training but also because of the loss of both his parents. Though he is quiet most people know him and like him because if addressed he is fairly sociable and will chat with those he is around with. He is also know to be very loyal to those that he does place his trust in and no one so far has tried to betray it. This is probably because of his skill as a warrior but because he is normally a friendly guy.

He also is a fairly ambitious person from his father pushing him to do his best and he strives to prove his worth to those in higher ranks than himself. He has a very tactical nature about him self again echoing his father’s training and as much as he is relaxed and casual when not on duty, when he is on duty he is a stellar example of the “perfect soldier”. He can be seen diligently training at either the Firing range with any type of weapon and he also likes to tinker and work on his weapons but more often that not he just cleans them and practices with them.

When on duty his uniform is clean and neat and he is clean as well because of his respect for the position he carries as a guard of the base. When not on duty he wears casual clothes normally consisting of cargo pants with the military boots and a military issue T shirt but always carries a side arm in a tactical holster on his right thigh. Another feature that is gossiped about around the base is a scar on his face. It starts above his left eye and travels across his face towards his left cheek. It is not large and is shallow enough that it is not very distinct but it is one of the features first noticed about him when people first meet him.

Though he has told a few people that it is because of a wild animal attack on his home planet most often joke about the idea that he got it in some sort of bar fight. He also plays along with this to a certain extent by laughing with them and performing a "drunken kung fu gag" to which he gets roaring laughter every time.

Likes: weapons, big explosions, tinkering with mechanical things, Meditation and Rain storms at night
Dislikes: Disloyalty, overly complicated situations, Panicing
Goals: To climb the ranks and become one of the best Combat Arms pilots the SAoY has seen to date


History

His father Leroy Reglo who was a former soldier in the Grand Star Army had moved to the planet Geshrintall looking to start a new life away from the conflicts on other planets. He soon met a native Geshrin named Sukora Gensha they soon were married and had a child named Lolion Reglo around year YE 07. However Sukora die soon after giving birth due to the plague in year YE 08. Leroy had managed to escape the planet after his wife died to protect his son and moved off to a distant planet that was like a desert, but had a few habitable areas and some colonies on it. Through out his child hood his father taught him all the knowledge he knew about the past and his career and taught him marksmanship.

There were many animals on the planet that he could hunt and soon he became an expert marksman though his father’s tutelage and his many ventures out into the desert. He learned how to support himself off the land and particularly excelled in surviving the harsh environments of the desert. Among other things his father also taught him how to fix mechanical objects that had broken around the house as well as the vehicles his father owned. He was particularly fond of tinkering with mechanical objects at a young age to see how they worked and tried to improve them here and the with mild success. This soon lead to an internship when he was 15 at a mechanical shop in one of the colonies that they lived close to. Around that time his father was called on by the Yamataian army to help protect the capital city because of his prior military service. Sadly Leroy was MIA and soon Lolion had to depend on his job at the mechanics shop to support himself and survive.

After a few more years of living hand to mouth he decided to join the Star Army of Yamatai. He sold all of the possessions he owned that he would not need and hitched a ride on a transport to Yamatai to join. He was quickly accepted at the Uesureyan Fields training facility and learned how to pilot the Power armor suits and also qualified as an infantry soldier as well. To date he never was posted to a position yet and can be seen diligently training with his Power suit but also with a variety of hand held, and long range weaponry.


Skills

Fighting: Lolion received hand-to-hand combat training, followed up with a rigorous training program. He is skilled and experienced in combat both in Yamatai-like conditions and in zero-gravity, with and without weapons. Weapons he is trained in include energy pistols, knives, and power armor. On top of the training that he received training with the SAoY, he is also a natural marksman. He stunned his father by hitting a bulls eye on his first shot with a rifle at about 200m. His fathers training further developed his natural ability to shoot at long ranges and the military help him even more to the point where he was one of the best shots on the base while in training

Communication: Lolion is familiar with basic radio operation and procedures and can make transmissions to and receive transmissions from other characters through headsets, starships, power armor, and shuttles in both combat and non-combat conditions. He is fluent in English. He can speak and write both correctly and efficiently and can write reports, fill forms, issue orders under fire, etc.

Technology Operation: Lolion is capable of operating any computer system that uses the Kessaku OS, found on all Star Army starships. He is proficient in entering and/or searching for information.

Mathematics: Lolion received basic mathematics training, to including up to algebra and trigonometry from the training facilities at the base he trained at.

Maintenance and Repair: Once again most of his abilities come from his fathers training but was bolstered by his job at the mechanics shop on his home world. This is a general knowledge and by no means is he on par with a regular Technician of the SAoY but if forced to do maintenance he can fix most minor problems and some land based vehicles.

Survival and Military: Most of what he learned was though his father and hunting wild game on his home planet but a good majority of his tactics are from the training he received at the military base. He excels at desert based operations and survival.

Demolition: Having grown up on a fairly arid planet with lots of space and free time to burn (literally) he normally entertained himself by using home made explosives or buying ones from the store in town. They weren’t exactly large but the knowledge he gained form this helped him get training for demo in the Star Army of Yamatai.


OOC Notes

Okay this is the edited version of my character and if i remember correctly i covered all the issues the posts on my page brought up. if i missed anything please tell me and i will change it to fit the requirements but this is starting to look more and more like a really good character the more i look at it. if anything from what i can see ( and how i know myself to be) i may have some history screwed up somewhere so check it for me to see if it creates any discrepancies but other than that i look forward to getting my post orders, gear and my butt kickin boots on...hehe ;D
 
Looking at the skills, you've built a Technician rather than a Power armor pilot. You are also missing the base Star Army of Yamatai skill sets. ^^;

These are the required skill sets (from the CCG:

# Communication: Your character is familiar with basic radio operation and procedures and can make transmissions to and receive transmissions from other characters through headsets, starships, power armor, and shuttles in both combat and non-combat conditions. Your character is fluent in Nepleslian, (and if a Nekovalkyrja, Yamataian). She can speak and write both correctly and efficiently and can write reports, fill forms, issue orders under fire, etc.

# Fighting: Your character received hand-to-hand combat training, followed up with a rigorous training program. She is skilled and experienced in combat both in Yamatai-like conditions and in zero-gravity, with and without weapons. Weapons she is trained in include energy pistols, knives, and power armor.

# Technology Operation: Your character is capable of operating any computer system that uses the Kessaku OS, found on all Star Army starships. She is proficient in entering and/or searching for information.

# Mathematics: Your character received basic mathematics training, to including up to algebra and trigonometry.

After adding these required skill you get 3 other skills. If you want him to be a techy: I'd keep Maintenance and repair; Survival and maybe Vehicles OR Rogue (see note).

We pilot our power armor through a headset (as a non-neko) or a direct interface with the suit (as a neko) , so it's not the same thing as driving a car or piloting a Gundam. But you have a bit of catch all here which is a little much.

Again with rogue you have a catch all here. If he grew up in the middle of a desert, I don't see the pick-pocket or streetwise thing. Especially if it was a Yamataian/Geshrin colony- they did something like "horse trading" rather than monetary exchanges.


My other concerns (mostly continuity stuff) :
Yamataians as a species didn't exist until YE 28. Sakora would have probably been a native Geshrin.

In YE 06, the planet was still Geshrintall and the planet did not have a system of actual currency until YE 24.

That army wasn't called the Star Army of Nepleslia then it was first the Grand Star Army.

Again: your character history screams Technican rather than combat specialist.

Character description: What's your definition of a "normal hair style" and "normal facial features"? Does he look Asian; African or Caucasian? Does he have a weak jawline; wide jaw; "OMG Golden Age superhero" jaw?

Over all you have a good start and concept here. There needs some refining of certain details and a decision on what sort of job you want your character to actually be.

This character is in progress.
 
1. You don't have an assignment yet, you would just put N/A. You'll be assigned once you have applied for orders and been accepted with your character.

2. For hair, you should be more specific. 'Normally styled' means different things to different people so describe it as you see it.

3. I don't know about the scar. I know full Yamatians can't have one, their bodies heal over too fast, but I'm not sure about half-breeds.

4. I'm not sure about the last part of your personality. I have been under the impression that you were not allowed to modify your PA without buying your own or getting permission from your superiors.

5. For your goals: Surely he has something more in mind than that? That won't take much, and then he won't have any goal once he has orders. Maybe add something longterm on, such as making a high officer rank, or something like that?

6. When I was reading through the History, I noticed several errors, both in conjugation of verbs, and spelling/grammar. Try running it through MWord, or have someone else do it for you.

7. Eliminate the things in parentheses after the names of the skills. Those should be clarified or explained in the skill description instead. Also about the skills, go into the CCG and read over the SAoY required skills list. There are some details you need to add in your skills.

8. I know some Yamatians who would take offense at your Physical. You imply that Yamatians aren't human. It is true that Neplesians are the closest to today's humans, but Yamatians are still considered human.

9. Under rogue, you list several skills that don't seem to fit with his personality. In your history you say it too, that he learned theft and other such things, but he hates disloyalty according to your personality. Theft is considered being disloyal to your people is it not?

10. Your vehicle skill seems a bit strong to me. There are many different systems, and I doubt he would be a master of all of them this early in his life. You might want to tone it down a bit.

11. About your questions, you are issued equipment and a EP card(electronic payment) once your character has been accepted. Ask Wes or some of the SAoY GMs for more info about that.

Overall, I think it is fairly good. Fix what I have found, and check with the GMs to make sure, and you should be good to go.


edit: dang, Kim beat me to it.
 
Half Yamataian/Half Nepleslian
This isn't possible, since Yamataians are androids with a totally different genetic code. They don't match up in number of chromosomes, etc.

Yamataian women CAN have children from Nepleslian fathers, but the child will be 100% Yamataian (possible with traits based on the father, depending on how the mom chooses).

You imply that Yamataians aren't human
Yamataians look human but are NOT human. They're actually a type of NH series android.
 
Well, to what Kim had said about Sakora being a native Geshrin, I agree. So, technically, this character would be a Geshrin/Nepleslian Hybrid. This usually means that the character would be slightly muscular, but not as muscular as a normal Nepleslian. However, one problem with that would be that you'd have to transfer to a Yamataian body to actually serve in the SAoY. Unless, of course, that species ban has been lifted, but I can't remember if it ever was or not. In a Yamataian body, you could still have a slightly muscular form. Well, good luck on your character!
 
The species ban was recently lifted.

Geshrins can scar, if he transfered to a Yamataian body he'd have to get the scar genetically tattooed on his face to keep it.
 
i wasn't expecting so many replies but i appreciate your input and will reconfigure my character to follow all of the guidelines you have told me...thx for the info... i mean after all im kinda jumping into this headfirst nor knowing anything and I could see a few things that could possibly need changed so i guess its good for a first time.
 
S'totally cool. This is absolutely normal for a new player to go through -- we're here to help, and as long as you're responsive to our concerns, this'll be a good learning process for you.
 
I'll get to this tonight if Kim or Wes don't, but before I do ... can you throw some returns into the history and personality?

Make it look like this, with paragraph breaks.

That way, we can read it much more easily, and it'll help you later when you have to format the wiki version of this bio.
 
Kim said:
The species ban was recently lifted.

Ah, thank you, Kim. Kim knows everything.

Kim said:
Geshrins can scar, if he transfered to a Yamataian body he'd have to get the scar genetically tattooed on his face to keep it.

Ah, yes, I forgot that part. ^^;; Well, at least I remembered most of the important stuff. ^_^

Also, what Doshii said is correct. Reading mounds of text is sometimes hard for the eyes. Though your personality and history are intense. He has quite a bit of detail in both places. His personality reminds me of a clone from Star Wars, which might be more suited in Nepleslia, but I guess Yamatai could use a few less social combat characters. :mrgreen:

A minor grammar error I have noticed is that you sometimes start a sentence without a capital letter. It could be insignificant, but perfection always helps.

I just realized that you spelled Santa Hei instead of Santo Hei. I like the symbols on the second 'A', though. :mrgreen: One last thing: Having all of your family deceased is a bad thing. It's called a cliche around here, and some people don't like that. Have a sister or something so that he has a least one tie to the universe. Plus, he could receive messages from his family to see how he is doing and such. It makes your character a little more interesting to interact with.
 
done done and done... i guess i could make my dad MIA instead of KIA...lol. The whole initial idea of not having a family anymore was for his melancholy side where he isn't the overly social type and normally doesn't chat much unless hes brought into a conversation. I'm looking to develop him a little more with the other PC's as i go along so yeah i believe his father being MIA instead of KIA would be better and would promote greater character developments than a completely dead family.
 
Build: Nepleslians are generally muscular; Geshrins are not typically. If he's tanned because he's living in a desert it isn't a result of having a naturally light tan skin tone- it's a result of hanging out in the sun for long periods of time. He could just have a light tan skin tone that's darker because he's in the sun all day (crazy farmer's tan). The choice of wording seems a little off. Does he have a tan because his skin is just that way or is it because of the sun? If it's because of the sun- what's it like normally?

Facial features: ... that doesn't make sense. How can one's face be muscular? I didn't even know you could build up your face muscles. o.0; I think what you are searching for is a round youthful face, with fine features like high cheeks bones but I'm really not sure. Do you want him to have a "baby face" or look more mature?


Fighting:

Being trained to be a marksman by his father would not equate to being a "natural" marksman- that's a result of training. Natural is when you pick up the rifle for the first time all the bullets are dead center in that target or extremely well. There is a difference. I'll accept the notion that he's an excellent marksman from training.

Also double check your paragraphs to change all the "She"s to "He"s.

Aside from these points; I don't see anything wrong with this character. I will approve him once the changes are made and those things are made clearer.
 
alright... i fixed the areas that you mentioned Kim and i guess i was trying to get a look that was in between youthful but not so adult that it is the cheesy version of the superhero. i didn't want his face to look like superman after all. and he has a light natural tan but its darker because of his exposure over the years to the sun. of course I'm sure over a year or two it will lessen though. But I'm just glad the hes done now...YAy...lol.
 
Alrighty.

This character is approved for IC usage. Please add this character bio to the wiki; add your contact information and then fill out the "request for orders" thread. It is very important to give us your contact info (Yahoo Instant Messenger is the preferred method for play by chat[JP] roleplay on the site) so the appropriate people can add you to their lists.

Welcome to the SARPG; we're looking forward to seeing you in action in one of our plots. =)
 
WOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you for accepting me into your community. I look forward to role playing with you soon.
 
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