Star Army
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Approved Character my new character
- Thread starter waylan16
- Start date
Sigma
Inactive Member
Um... Not quite. There's some issues which I'm surprised Wes didn't catch.
1) In the box with the Anon art, you state his weight to be 197lbs. Then further down, it's 157 lbs. Please clarify which is the correct weight.
2) If his father was an ID-SOL, then the Super-Y chromosome would make Francis an ID-SOL as well. A hybrid, rather than a pure one, but nonetheless much bigger and much bulkier. 5'11" is a midget of an ID-SOL.
3) I'd like some explanation of the cybernetics and their capabilities, in the author's mind. This prevents us from speaking at cross-purposes with regards to ability.
4) Skills. I'd prefer to see them as a list. The current format is rather... difficult to read at a glance. Also, starter characters do not get the option to become a specialist anymore. Your character may have had previous formal or informal training in medicine but you should start off as a regular Marine and work towards that specialization. Assuming you can survive mentorship under Laura Romero.
5) Is there a particular reason you chose the IAW over the 4th Fleet's standard rifle, the Showstopper? I'm curious to know why since the majority of 4th Fleet players prefer the Showstopper over the IAW.
6) Please check your inbox soon for a PM.
1) In the box with the Anon art, you state his weight to be 197lbs. Then further down, it's 157 lbs. Please clarify which is the correct weight.
2) If his father was an ID-SOL, then the Super-Y chromosome would make Francis an ID-SOL as well. A hybrid, rather than a pure one, but nonetheless much bigger and much bulkier. 5'11" is a midget of an ID-SOL.
3) I'd like some explanation of the cybernetics and their capabilities, in the author's mind. This prevents us from speaking at cross-purposes with regards to ability.
4) Skills. I'd prefer to see them as a list. The current format is rather... difficult to read at a glance. Also, starter characters do not get the option to become a specialist anymore. Your character may have had previous formal or informal training in medicine but you should start off as a regular Marine and work towards that specialization. Assuming you can survive mentorship under Laura Romero.
5) Is there a particular reason you chose the IAW over the 4th Fleet's standard rifle, the Showstopper? I'm curious to know why since the majority of 4th Fleet players prefer the Showstopper over the IAW.
6) Please check your inbox soon for a PM.
Sigma
Inactive Member
After reading the edits, there's still several problems.
1) He's still very short for an ID-SOL. The average height is about seven and a half feet. Shorter ones are around 7'.
2) The capabilities of the aural cybernetic is beyond acceptable. Doubling the human hearing range would make him able to hear anything. The average human can hear 20 kilohertz (and this decreases with age). For someone who grew up surrounded by gang-warfare and clearly not part of the privileged section of Nep society, there's little chance he could afford anything besides a cybernetic prosthetic that would significantly improve his hearing.
3) If he joined at 18, what has he been doing for the past 3 years to remain as a P3C?
4) How does he know how to use hospital equipment? That's not part of Boot Camp and I don't see anything about working in a hospital. I realize that that's the vanilla wording from the wiki but, as I said, starting characters usually aren't specialists.
1) He's still very short for an ID-SOL. The average height is about seven and a half feet. Shorter ones are around 7'.
2) The capabilities of the aural cybernetic is beyond acceptable. Doubling the human hearing range would make him able to hear anything. The average human can hear 20 kilohertz (and this decreases with age). For someone who grew up surrounded by gang-warfare and clearly not part of the privileged section of Nep society, there's little chance he could afford anything besides a cybernetic prosthetic that would significantly improve his hearing.
3) If he joined at 18, what has he been doing for the past 3 years to remain as a P3C?
4) How does he know how to use hospital equipment? That's not part of Boot Camp and I don't see anything about working in a hospital. I realize that that's the vanilla wording from the wiki but, as I said, starting characters usually aren't specialists.
This character is approved for IC usage.
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Welcome to the Star Army Role-Play.
