Approved Submission Ocugus Array

I'll go ahead and approve this in 2 days if there aren't any complaints.

1) "The first interferometers were built on Atos and then on other celestial bodies, but the Ocugus Array is the fulfillment of that dream, with the Atargatis Array achieved first light in 945 PR, the Dagotha Array in 987 PR, and the Nyargmal Array just this year in 1024 PR."

This sentence needs to be corrected. I think it should be apparent why, but I'll explain. Either it needs to read, "while the Atargatis Array achieved..." or, "with the Atargatis Array achieving...."

2) From the above excerpt, first light of first flight?

3) "What were the prinpricks that dotted the night sky, only visible when they climbed to the top of the jungle canopy that made up their home."

This sentence should end in a question mark.

4) "The main instrument of the Ocugus Array, the GWD thus takes up a majority of the space."

Thus does not fit here. Maybe say, "As it is the main instrument of the Ocugus Array, the GWD takes up a majority of the space (Of what? Ambiguous. Space space or the space of the Ocugus Array?)."

5) "...the aftereffects of hyperspace..."

After effects is not one word.


Looks good!

Thanks for the grammar and sentence structure suggestions. For future reference, first light (as is explained in the wikipedia link) is the first use of the telescope, which makes sense since this is a sensor system.

OMG it's a LIGO! It's like I'm reading about home.

That is what inspired this, yeah. Forgot i took out the direct link to that and its been added back in.