Approved Submission [Species] Theradectus (space spiders)

Oh hey, I was just looking at this page last night! Good to see they're ready!

I'll give them a full look when I get home after work. One thing is: new species on SARP currently require some artwork. Are you going to need me to come up with this or did you have some plan for it already?

I don't have anything lined up for it, no. If you can point me at an artist that you think could draw this, I'll gladly pay for the art.

We've used Weremole in the past for some similar pieces. I could also split the cost with you perhaps. Like if he wants $70 I could pay that and you could make a $25 site supporter donation or something like that.

That would work for me.

Sorry it's been taking me so long to review these. Last weekend I had a wedding to attend and the weekend before that I was out of down for a graduation. Basically it's been super busy this month.

This review is for: Theradectus Species Article

The submitted article is/has…
[X] A very high level of overall quality
[X] A general topic sentence under the title header - I feel the the overview should probably just be in the first section.
[ ] Artwork (Required for new species; Strongly recommended for vehicles and hand weapons)
[ ] Needed and/or useful to the setting - Would like some explanation of what function these guys would have in the RP
[X] In the proper format/template
[X] Proofread for spelling and grammar
[X] Easy to read and understand (not a lengthy mass of technobabble)
[X] Wikified (terms that could be a link should be a link)
[X] No red and/or broken links
[X] Reasonably scientifically plausible
[X] Reasonably neutral point of view

The submitted article is/does not…
[X] Overpowered (or cutting tech for a faction with little or no roleplay)
[X] Obtusely redundant
[X] Contain copy pasta descriptions of systems or interior compartments
[X] Unauthorized by faction managers or player-controlled corporation
[X] Contain references to IC events that have not occurred (SM must authorize retcons)
[X] Use second-person language (“you” or “your”) unless it is an instructional guide aimed at players.
[X] Use bombastic language (“virtually immune,” “nearly indestructible,” “insanely powerful,” “horrible effects”)
[X] Use an unbalanced header/text ratio (many headers but sections are one-liners)
[X] Use major unapproved sub-articles that should be submitted separately
[X] Lacking Detail
[X] Images hosted on sites other than stararmy.com (Photobucket, Imageshack, etc are not allowed)

The article has…
[NA] Speeds in compliance with the Starship Speed Standard, if applicable
[NA] Damage Capacity and Damage Ratings in compliance with the DR Guidelines
[NA] The in-character year of creation/manufacture. (Should be current year. Future years not allowed).
[NA] The Standard Product Nomenclature System, if applicable.


Summary
No major issues, just need more OOC info on why they are going to be useful to the setting and art acquisition, which I've offered to help with.

This article is essentially approved at this point.

Status: Pending

Notes
Contains links to un-approved sub articles that need submission.

I edited the page to move the description to the top of the page and put the overall goal in the OOC section. Just so its on here, I was planning on having the first part of roleplaying the faction, either NPC or PC depending on whether people are interested in being spiders, would entail the first contact with the other factions of the StarArmy universe. Depending on how that goes, they'll either be a place to do some diplomacy and maybe fight some spider pirates or do some straight up wars against the faction itself.

And if anyone is interested enough to help me with writing up all the other articles that need to get done before that, let me know.

Approved, with the expectation that we'll get art at the next opportunity.

Added to the physiology, psychological and evolutionary background section.

Can you provide me with a summary of the updates?

Fixed some grammar stuff in the physiology section, changed spiderlings to broodlings, described how their early life went, gave a date that adolescents become of age (17 years), and some more grammar stuff and an example of their xenophobia in the psychology section.

Edit: Essentially this- https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=species:theradectus&rev=1463767574&do=diff

Okay, updates approved.