The Aeonic Race

Someone look into this please?

Princess is ok

Brood is not ok (header to text ratio. It needs to be more fleshed out)

The Araneae: Needs artwork.

Physiology: You really should remove the sentence saying that “the race plans to move out into space it may attempt to evolve this weakness to something more useful” because this is on the line as far as the ‘don’t include events in the future’ rule goes.

Physiology-Reproduction: There are no females outside of the queen, but you do have that princess article. Can you clarify this some?

History-Winning the playing field.: In the last paragraph it says “… that could terminally ill a Queen…” I’m not sure this is proper grammar and at the very least I’d like to see a little more description on the effects and how the ants were able to infect the queens. The way I see it if you can get close enough to poison them why not just kill them?

History-A new contender: What other groups? The history section paints a picture that there are just the insect colonies controlling things with no third parties in existence aside from ‘dumb bugs’

History- Foreshadowed Threat: Ophiralis sounds like it should be its own submission

History-Modern Day: This goes against the “no future events” rule. It is best to just remove it entirely until they are actually used at which point you can go back and fill it in with the details of first contact.

I have made edits to the history and still working on Physiology a little, the quote you gave in your Physiology I don't see so I don't know where it is.

Aside from the Spider race thus far, Ant and Bee races do not have genders, only worker and egg layer. Egg layer is named Queen since it's an obvious human attachment to bugs and their role as leader. I have chosen not to include gender in specific species because they have no gender.

I have no idea what you mean in the Princess article since I had changed it a long while ago into a smaller note detailing what it is specifically unless you found it elsewhere.

History-A new contender: ---- I wonder why you brought it up since the title reads properly as "A New Contender, the Termitidae." Even more so when the first line reads

"While the two groups tried to outmatch each other on the evolutionary ladder, a new race slowly evolved using the breeder/worker combo of the Apoida, though with vastly weaker drones. This group became the Termitidae"

Click to expand...

The Termitidae is a race that is not going to impact SARP for a long time, not at least until I invent a warp drive thing first. They are important however to the development of the race, and also allows me room to create this race later since it somewhat different from the one's showcased without having to retcon it later.

Scot, can you update us as to the status of this submission?

I renamed the spider race and gave a new secondary name to the ants, Formiga. Basically a formal and informal name for the race for sake of pronouncement. Later I must work on culture to indicate Ants use science names over informal names while others vice versa.

As for history, that is probably about 2000 years before YE... maybe longer. This is due to the first set of ships not having sublight speeds until the next wave, so this is what they will know of when they get to SARP space.

I also need to change the Solenichi, and add the Kikichi (Spider Solenichi, since they have genders). Solenichi I originally have warrior/citizen mostly out of normal SARP though of having a city when that isn't necessary unless they are a PC race. Rather there are roles that need to be fulfilled... it's something I still need to think over.

I kinda burned out on Separa and came back here, did a lot of work on Broods section, gave the "formiga alliance" a better name hopefully and is fixed a little as well as gives forshadow of what I might extend that to.

This is awesome, I got work to do.