Re: Tadao Yamamoo
1. So he likes to help his friends ... but what about obeying orders? Does he like to do that? How well does he do it?
2. Instead of "Battle Ship," just say warship or military vessel.
3. What kind of performing did the mother do?
4. "Later investigations," not "latter."
5. Gang wars on Yamatai are pretty rare, and are likely wars between rival clans, not gangs. Most are on in the Eastern portion of the nation, in places such as Malifar.
6. An energy rifle instead of "plasma rifle." Plasma has more distinctive properties in this setting (large damage, mostly in power armor weapons).
7. In the skills, you already know you need the boilerplate ones. Those will replace what you have for those skills already, but I'll go over them so you know what you cannot add later.
a. Entertainment: Reading people like this is an incredibly impressive skill, not to mention imitating any voice or copying any behavior. I'd settle for the copying behavior, but imitating voices takes one heck of a lot of work, not to mention great maintenance of one's voice.
b. Rogue: You've included history in this skill (posing as a military officer, as the SAoY doesn't have generals). Take that out. Keep history in history, and if you have to, use the history to justify the skill. Also, it's "ales."
c. Fighting: To start, it's "excellent." Next: He will not be an excellent marksman with any firearm. Not all firearms operate the same way, and without extensive training on all of them, a person will not use them at the same degree of skill. Use the boilerplate stuff here. If you want to create a subskill under Fighting for his throwing knife skill, you can do that.
d. Survival and Military: First, Tadao didn't join the Navy. He joined the Star Army of Yamatai. Next, when did he learn to do all of this tracking and moving and such if he was busy learning how to be a Rogue from his mother, or a soldier from his father? In fact, why didn't his father teach him these things?
e. Knowledge: Everyone on Yamatai has a theoretically "excellent" memory through their computerized brains. The skill is that he knows all of these songs, stories, personalities and inn layouts. Perhaps a more accurate way of framing this skill is that he's very observant.
f. Starship operations: Stick with the boilerplate, and do not use any of what you already have done. My character Yukari is a fair starship operator, but she couldn't perform at the level of even a beginning engineer no matter how many times she's seen it. The same goes for your character. He'll be good at some things, bad at others. That's just how it is. Show me some weaknesses.
g. There is no evidence, in the history or presented in the skill, that would show Tadao is an effective leader. I suggest you remove this skill and use the open slot to create the throwing knife subskill.
Overall: Overpowered, sloppy and too much like Marvel's Mystique character, but definitely workable. Basically, there are two views I have of this character: One is that he should be a Nepleslian serving with Nepleslia. Second, you didn't really study much or read much before creating this character, or you're merely careless.
This is your introduction. We take our fun seriously, and we want you to, as well, and this is your chance to show us that. The "rogue" side of this character is a good one, and could provide for some great interactions and roleplay with other characters. But he's too much of a badass right now, and he needs to not be. What are his flaws? What are his weaknesses? (History questions.) Where could he potentially fail his friends? What would he do if he does fail? How would he interact with others once he has failed? (Personality questions.) You need to answer these questions to make this character someone other people will want to play with.
Take the questions Aendri and Nashoba have already posed to you, as well as what I've listed here, and really scrub this character. There's a gem here; you've just got to polish it up.
This character is pending.