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Approved Character Viktoria Ritter

What's with all these Abwehrans going to work for Origin?

Anyway, a few suggestions I have right off the bat.

  • - Add English Measurements to Height and Weight
    - Add your character's Age in standard years (AY * 3.51=Standard years)
    - Might want to read through your app a bit. You sometimes call your character Wiki.
    - A little more proofreading would be nice. I've noted quite a few small errors in spelling that could be corrected by a quick read through.

Anyway, after you edit it, I'll go over it once more before making any decisions.

PENDING.
 
Measurements added, earth years added, no Wiki there at all now. Spell-checked and proofread and can't find anything.

And Abwehrans are very awesome and Origin is very awesome. Add two together......
 
Eyes and Facial Features:
"Viki has rather small nose adn thin lips."

Distinguishing Features:
"Viki has many tattos."
"All her tattos are done in black colour (except flames)."

Personality:
"Viktoria could be desribed as calm under pressure."
"She is also very sexualy free and bisexual."

These are just a few I have found.
 
History needs form wordsmithing, the grammar is a bit messed up. Examples:

Parent were very conservative and Viki found that too suffocating and boring.

Parents were or Parent was

As high school she choosed military one although she had no intend to join military afterwards.

At high school she chose a military


martial aru, martial arts

But with almost one of detective skills she could catch only targets that actually weren't hiding.

But with almost no detective skills
 
RPG-D RPGfix
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