...and all the King's Men
Couldn't put Humpty together again.
4th Fleet HQ, Nepleslia Prime, Medical Wing
>ON
"Private First Class Henry Morris?" the psychiatric counsellor asked with a smile. He was a middle aged man, slightly greying but otherwise chipper and outwardly friendly. Henry was sitting in a comfortable chair, with an end table that had a glass of water, and a jug for refills. His favourite brandy flask was left there too.
He looked up at the psychologist from looking at the floor and replied, quietly, "Yes?"
"So what would be the reason for your visit? Not enough sleep? Bad dreams? Too much anxiety? Too few things to hit?" the counsellor asked calmly. He had a notebook on his lap and a pen in hand.
Henry rubbed his chinfluff before looking up, looking at the psychologist in the eye and saying, "You could say, uh, that its anxiety, yes," His eyes were unfocused and his gaze wandered around the room, "Lost some sleep, too." He took off his reading glasses. He never needed them since his eyes were cybernetic, but he liked to put them on when he was off duty. He placed them on the end table.
The counsellor hummed as he glanced at his notes about Henry's service record. "How long ago did this start? Was it as bad as this or has it been progressively worsening?"
Henry sighed as he remembered the events that lead to now, "It started when Wazu and his little bitch took the helm," He wasn't going to apologise for what he said, "So much waste, so much alienation, and so many good men dying," He looked up again, "We might've saved the senate, but at what cost?" He sniffed and took a drink of water.
"This was on the Acadia?" Henry nodded in reply.
"Tell me, what exactly is it that you're referring to. I have the notes but I'd like to hear from you what you went through," the counsellor said, making a quick scribble.
Henry fiddled with the buttons on his uniform as he recalled the memories, "It all started one day when we were told that we had a small change in leadership. Chief Vel Steyr was called, and he never came back," He sighed, "I miss Vel Steyr, best leader I served under, bar Miller himself," He took a sip of water before continuing, "I thought that having Admiral Wazu on deck would be a good thing for morale, but what he brought with him made everyone on deck do the opposite. And the armourers that were contracted by Wazu to examine and repair our armours - they couldn't tell arse from elbow! Most of us had to rescue the senators without an armour, while we were facing Rippers and Mindies!"
Henry always had the sneaking suspicion that those girls who botched the job were spies. He then took a breath, "But I digress, that's just an idle complaint compared to what happened just the other day, I'm sure you heard about it too." He was referring to the Cavalier's gargantuan, anti-matter fuelled breach of orders.
"Rumours only. Admiral Valken is usually unhappy about something. Men in that position usually are since nothing can always go their way," the counsellor replied off-handedly. "Your complaint is that you're suffering from recurring nightmares about when you had to face the squids without armour?" he added for clarification.
Henry was reluctant to answer, hoping that the counsellor wouldn't judge him or think any less of him, "Yes, you could say. The armourer on deck apparently had a hell of a time prying me out of my VOID. I don't remember any of it, but he told me later that I was asking to be left inside, bargaining with him feverishly." He touched his forehead and frowned, "Nobody else in the squad has said anything about it - maybe they were being polite, or they found my ... state of mind useful to the situation. There is another issue, though."
On the inside, Henry was awash with doubt - would his openness with the counsellor do him in and limit his options within the Marines? He answered anyway. It was time to let it all out, "Private Mayhew and I were in the facility before Volkov's Cavaliers, part of Hudson's Raiders. When we re-met with them, I thought things would look up, but when the building came down, the ambush happened, things went from bad to worse. Ever since the Acadia, I've felt as though failure has been shadowing me. Maybe I've spent too long here."
"Well, do you think you, particularly, failed? From what I hear, that particular episode had nothing to do with you. Did it?" the counsellor asked. He fairly sure that those involved had been soldiers actually assigned to Volkov's Cavaliers.
"Yes, Mayhew and I integrated with the Cavaliers as honoraries, but I'm worried that my previous track record with Volkov will mean that by proxy, I am a Cavalier. I didn't do anything wrong, but I'm worried that I'll shoulder part of the blame and shame with the others."
"I think it's safe to say that if you have not heard about it from the Admiral by now, you won't be involved. What makes you think that failure follows you? Because it sounds to me that you're not feeling confidence in yourself," the counsellor asked. He had dealt with similar cases in the past and it often revolved around them feeling responsible for an event or events out of their control.
Henry nodded, "Its just since the scandalous end of the Acadia, there's always been something niggling in the back of my head, that nagging feeling that not all is right. It isn't just professional pessimism either."
The counsellor was silent for a moment, making a decision of how to approach this. "When was the last time you had leave, Private?" he finally asked. That wasn't in his notes strangely. Henry looked troubled when this question arose.
"I... I..." He stammered, "I have no fucking clue. I tried to transfer to a colony and perform a much cushier role in planetside defence, but that never went anywhere." He was referring to the little frontier city by the name of Francia, "I was left in limbo, drifting from assignment to assignment, mostly doing background engineering rather than on-ground gruntwork."
"So do you feel that you, yourself, have been able to relax and enjoy life recently? Because I believe you may be becoming too stressed over what, in reality, are minor things. If the recent events had not occurred, would you still be feeling this way?" the counsellor said.
Henry's eyes darted to his flask for a moment before they went back to the counsellor, "I'd be feeling a lot better than I am now, that's for certain."
"I see. I must admit, it is difficult to make an exact diagnosis in the first time. Often, these issues require multiple meetings to fully understand the problems at hand. For now, I would suggest taking some leave, relaxing however you want, and taking it easy away from the regimented life in the military. Then come back and see me in two weeks. I can prescribe sleeping pills for you if you want," the counsellor offered.
Henry nodded in reply. A proper break would work wonders. He contemplated if he should build something - not for anyone in particular, but a selfish pursuit to brush up on his mechanical prowess.
"Sleeping pills?" the counsellor offered again.
"Certainly." He thought of eschewing them on the nights so he could stay up and focus on what he was building, but they would help with his irregular sleep patterns. Might as well have them on hand when I need them.
>OFF
Couldn't put Humpty together again.
4th Fleet HQ, Nepleslia Prime, Medical Wing
>ON
"Private First Class Henry Morris?" the psychiatric counsellor asked with a smile. He was a middle aged man, slightly greying but otherwise chipper and outwardly friendly. Henry was sitting in a comfortable chair, with an end table that had a glass of water, and a jug for refills. His favourite brandy flask was left there too.
He looked up at the psychologist from looking at the floor and replied, quietly, "Yes?"
"So what would be the reason for your visit? Not enough sleep? Bad dreams? Too much anxiety? Too few things to hit?" the counsellor asked calmly. He had a notebook on his lap and a pen in hand.
Henry rubbed his chinfluff before looking up, looking at the psychologist in the eye and saying, "You could say, uh, that its anxiety, yes," His eyes were unfocused and his gaze wandered around the room, "Lost some sleep, too." He took off his reading glasses. He never needed them since his eyes were cybernetic, but he liked to put them on when he was off duty. He placed them on the end table.
The counsellor hummed as he glanced at his notes about Henry's service record. "How long ago did this start? Was it as bad as this or has it been progressively worsening?"
Henry sighed as he remembered the events that lead to now, "It started when Wazu and his little bitch took the helm," He wasn't going to apologise for what he said, "So much waste, so much alienation, and so many good men dying," He looked up again, "We might've saved the senate, but at what cost?" He sniffed and took a drink of water.
"This was on the Acadia?" Henry nodded in reply.
"Tell me, what exactly is it that you're referring to. I have the notes but I'd like to hear from you what you went through," the counsellor said, making a quick scribble.
Henry fiddled with the buttons on his uniform as he recalled the memories, "It all started one day when we were told that we had a small change in leadership. Chief Vel Steyr was called, and he never came back," He sighed, "I miss Vel Steyr, best leader I served under, bar Miller himself," He took a sip of water before continuing, "I thought that having Admiral Wazu on deck would be a good thing for morale, but what he brought with him made everyone on deck do the opposite. And the armourers that were contracted by Wazu to examine and repair our armours - they couldn't tell arse from elbow! Most of us had to rescue the senators without an armour, while we were facing Rippers and Mindies!"
Henry always had the sneaking suspicion that those girls who botched the job were spies. He then took a breath, "But I digress, that's just an idle complaint compared to what happened just the other day, I'm sure you heard about it too." He was referring to the Cavalier's gargantuan, anti-matter fuelled breach of orders.
"Rumours only. Admiral Valken is usually unhappy about something. Men in that position usually are since nothing can always go their way," the counsellor replied off-handedly. "Your complaint is that you're suffering from recurring nightmares about when you had to face the squids without armour?" he added for clarification.
Henry was reluctant to answer, hoping that the counsellor wouldn't judge him or think any less of him, "Yes, you could say. The armourer on deck apparently had a hell of a time prying me out of my VOID. I don't remember any of it, but he told me later that I was asking to be left inside, bargaining with him feverishly." He touched his forehead and frowned, "Nobody else in the squad has said anything about it - maybe they were being polite, or they found my ... state of mind useful to the situation. There is another issue, though."
On the inside, Henry was awash with doubt - would his openness with the counsellor do him in and limit his options within the Marines? He answered anyway. It was time to let it all out, "Private Mayhew and I were in the facility before Volkov's Cavaliers, part of Hudson's Raiders. When we re-met with them, I thought things would look up, but when the building came down, the ambush happened, things went from bad to worse. Ever since the Acadia, I've felt as though failure has been shadowing me. Maybe I've spent too long here."
"Well, do you think you, particularly, failed? From what I hear, that particular episode had nothing to do with you. Did it?" the counsellor asked. He fairly sure that those involved had been soldiers actually assigned to Volkov's Cavaliers.
"Yes, Mayhew and I integrated with the Cavaliers as honoraries, but I'm worried that my previous track record with Volkov will mean that by proxy, I am a Cavalier. I didn't do anything wrong, but I'm worried that I'll shoulder part of the blame and shame with the others."
"I think it's safe to say that if you have not heard about it from the Admiral by now, you won't be involved. What makes you think that failure follows you? Because it sounds to me that you're not feeling confidence in yourself," the counsellor asked. He had dealt with similar cases in the past and it often revolved around them feeling responsible for an event or events out of their control.
Henry nodded, "Its just since the scandalous end of the Acadia, there's always been something niggling in the back of my head, that nagging feeling that not all is right. It isn't just professional pessimism either."
The counsellor was silent for a moment, making a decision of how to approach this. "When was the last time you had leave, Private?" he finally asked. That wasn't in his notes strangely. Henry looked troubled when this question arose.
"I... I..." He stammered, "I have no fucking clue. I tried to transfer to a colony and perform a much cushier role in planetside defence, but that never went anywhere." He was referring to the little frontier city by the name of Francia, "I was left in limbo, drifting from assignment to assignment, mostly doing background engineering rather than on-ground gruntwork."
"So do you feel that you, yourself, have been able to relax and enjoy life recently? Because I believe you may be becoming too stressed over what, in reality, are minor things. If the recent events had not occurred, would you still be feeling this way?" the counsellor said.
Henry's eyes darted to his flask for a moment before they went back to the counsellor, "I'd be feeling a lot better than I am now, that's for certain."
"I see. I must admit, it is difficult to make an exact diagnosis in the first time. Often, these issues require multiple meetings to fully understand the problems at hand. For now, I would suggest taking some leave, relaxing however you want, and taking it easy away from the regimented life in the military. Then come back and see me in two weeks. I can prescribe sleeping pills for you if you want," the counsellor offered.
Henry nodded in reply. A proper break would work wonders. He contemplated if he should build something - not for anyone in particular, but a selfish pursuit to brush up on his mechanical prowess.
"Sleeping pills?" the counsellor offered again.
"Certainly." He thought of eschewing them on the nights so he could stay up and focus on what he was building, but they would help with his irregular sleep patterns. Might as well have them on hand when I need them.
>OFF
