What's new
  • If you were supposed to get an email from the forum but didn't (e.g. to verify your account for registration), email Wes at [email protected] or talk to me on Discord for help. Sometimes the server hits our limit of emails we can send per hour.
  • Get in our Discord chat! Discord.gg/stararmy
  • 📅 April 2024 is YE 46.3 in the RP.

Approved Character Drake Stormblade

D

Drake Starblade

Inactive Member
Name: Drake Starblade

General Information
Species: (Plebeian) Elysian
Gender: Male
Age: 25

Family/Creators: John Stormblade (Father, dead),
Anna Stormblade (Mother, dead), Moshinaru Genton (Older Sister, dead)

Faction: Star Army of Yamatai
Occupation: Infantry
Rank: Nito Heisho
Current Assignment:

Physical Characteristics
Height: 6'5â€
 
Welcome!

1) Review the CCG more closely.

2) Nepleslian might be a better choice if you want to use the 'fighting skills growing up on the street' sort of history.

3) Expand your history.

4) Expand your personality. What's he like in everyday life? How would he react to certain common situations?

5) Assign him a Santo Hei rank if he's going to be in the YSA.

6) He can't weigh 70 pounds and be 6'5" if he's a Geshrin for sure. That's just ummm.....not muscular as you describe.

7) Fix your skills.

8) Make him seem less godlike. What are his flaws? What does he have no predisposition for that would otherwise aid the YSA? (or NSA, which I would suggest)

That's what I can think of off the top of my head. Best of luck, and welcome! ^^
 
Fix the format. Rei gave some good advice, but I'm going to disagree about the history. It doesn't need much expansion. You can say he lived on the street, but don't make him out to be some experienced fighter. As long as the childhood was normal it's not really necessary to have a bunch of stuff about it. However, the history sounds more like a description for a fighting skill. It's not bad, really, just fix the format and look over what Rei said again.
 
I must disagree with Jadg. A loosly made History is not really that helpful.

Detail, even in moteration, would expand the history of the character.
 
The level of detail for history is always preferred to be low. The level of detail for personality is always preferred to be high. ;p

Yeah your guy sounds more of the Nepleslian style. Plus, and I hate to say this, there's not much use for ground based infantry, especially in the current threads. Except maybe on the Destiny? You may end up being a Armor pilot or maybe an MP.
 
And the skill area descriptions...
 
Elysian? I don't think newer folks like us can play them without permission? I think you meant Nepleslian? Good to know you're working on it, though! ^^
 
New players are welcome to make Elysian Plebeian characters. Getting an Elysian Patrician approved is a long-shot, since they are mostly officers in the Star Army.
 
Profile needs a lot of work. But that is okay, we are glad you are here anyway. If you would like, I would be happy to give you a hand with the profile and anything else you need. (My contact info is up in the Lounge)

One thing I found very helpful when creating a profile for my character was to look at the already approved profiles of others, in combination with the CCG I think its good. All the suggestions here should be helpful as well. But I have one final one to add;

Histories are tough especially when you have not played the character yet. One good way to get a good grasp of things is to check out the link to the timeline on the main page . It gives a breif outline of important events in the SA universe over the years.

Another thing, All characters have different personalities. But remember that the more dynamic and complex your character'is the more things you can have to RP out. Fighting is cool but try not to make it the entire foundation of the character. It tends to lead to....dry spells later on.
Welcome... :)
 
The history is sort of stereotypical now. There's quite a lot of orphans, but you probably didn't know that, and it's not too bad. I like the personality, and being an orphan actually helps in that area. Have fun.
 
He lived in small house with a friend of his late familys until he was old enough to join the military. Because he lived on the street he learned how to fight with many types of weapons.
Click to expand...

So did he grow up in a house or on the streets?

Also, I don't think an Elysian becomes a Plebe just because his parents died, since the Patrician bloodline is still there. Wes? Tyler?
 
he lived in a house with a friend of his familys but since they were keen on knowing what went on that evening he tends to stay out of there house so they cant question him
 
RPG-D RPGfix
Back
Top