Cannonball
Inactive Member
Name: Garret "Hawkâ€
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Approved Character Garret Anderson
- Thread starter Cannonball
- Start date
Cannonball
Inactive Member
Add my family to general roleplay? Do you mean add them into the history or something else?
Cannonball
Inactive Member
Well, I looked over the example biography and several other approved character (those that weren't Neko anyway =p). The only difference I could find between my family and several others was a slight formatting discrepency - which I believe I have fixed - and their accidentlal omission from the history which is also fixed.
Now, if you meant something else I can't seem to find it so I think I'm going to need a more detailed explanation if what I've done isn't exactly what your were thinking of.
Now, if you meant something else I can't seem to find it so I think I'm going to need a more detailed explanation if what I've done isn't exactly what your were thinking of.
Cannonball
Inactive Member
Fixed birthdate and fixed spelling mistake.
I've used both list and paragraph physical descriptions in the past and I have always felt that the paragraph format was more thorough and generally better if the person writing it could pull off a decent description. It will be changed if it must be changed but I'd rather keep it the way it is
I've used both list and paragraph physical descriptions in the past and I have always felt that the paragraph format was more thorough and generally better if the person writing it could pull off a decent description. It will be changed if it must be changed but I'd rather keep it the way it is
I just wanted to say that it's not always necessary to name the parents, Luke. Sometimes it's important, sometimes it's not. You're coming along though.
As for the character, it's good, just listen to Rei. You might need to change a bit of the formatting, but you'd have to talk to Wes about that, because your format is basically the same. Also, don't post in the Request Orders thread until your character is approved.
As for the character, it's good, just listen to Rei. You might need to change a bit of the formatting, but you'd have to talk to Wes about that, because your format is basically the same. Also, don't post in the Request Orders thread until your character is approved.
Cannonball
Inactive Member
Given most of the skills a solid (and somewhat lower) cap.
And aplogies about the orders and what not. Looks like I was just a bit too eager B)
And aplogies about the orders and what not. Looks like I was just a bit too eager B)
I just thought it is usually a good idea to have something about the parents, it makes the background of the character much more solid and could also become the point of some very intresting RPing.
Yes I was wondering about that, it seems he has become a crew member on the valiant, well he has posted his information on the OOC sign up sheet.
Yes I was wondering about that, it seems he has become a crew member on the valiant, well he has posted his information on the OOC sign up sheet.
Character approved.
A few things to fix:
A few things to fix:
- If he's 17, chances are he was born on Yamatai, then wandered to Nataria (Nataria wasn't colonized 17 years ago).
- Change "psychotic" to "psychology."
- Change "personal" to "personnel" (caretakers in history).
- It's not Fleet Despository, just Fleet Depot (see 3rd definition).
Cannonball
Inactive Member
History changed to accomdate the colonization problem, depo and personnel spellings corrected, and psychoitc deleted (don't even know how that got there).
