Note: From Awards to Present~
ON: YSS Eucharis
"Finally!" Misaki smiled while hanging up a few things in Kim's section of the bunk area whose door was shut, reading simply '1' on the other side. They had just returned to their quarters before the ship departed, the shopping trip had taken up most of their free time after the awards ceremony. There was still a buzz that felt like it jumped along her skin, the recent promotion and time to fully settle that both people most important to her were all right.
Kim however was grumbling goodnaturedly as she was busy stashing away the other half of the items they had gotten during their shopping spree. The soldier still didn't quite understand how Misaki had fooled her into getting high-heeled shoes and a dress. Running a hand through her fiery red hair, Kim simply smiled over at Misaki.
"Now there's no more excuses, is there? I never understood why there was a rule against pets until I saw that creature at the market." The officer smiled back, reaching for the next item of clothing. She placed it with the other, separating the uniforms from civvies. "We have quite a trip back to the sector. I'm looking forward to being there again. Even the name is nice." Some of the Ketsurui training in her seemed deeper, if it was training at all in that moment. Snapping out of it eventually, she opened one of the drawers and started to place part of the haul of lingerie and other non-issue undies inside.
"Yeah." Was all Kim replied, putting the final pieces of clothing into the locker, before taking off her shirt and began to remove the knife strapped to her back. "Y'know, I really don't fit in outside the Army... you saw how I was back there." Placing the knife in a separate drawer, in which she stored her standard issue sidearm as well, Kim recalled how tense and uncomfortable she had been in the civilian stores.
"Neither do I, learning bits on your own is how to do it, unless you have a mentor." Misaki replied without trying to sound like it was a lecture. Everything away, she closed the drawer and went to sit on the bottom bunk. "It gets easier, I promise."
"I'll hold you to that." Pulling her shirt back on, Kim went to sit beside Misaki. Hugging her close, the soldier smiled happily and gently kissed her cheek, simply enjoying the comfort of having the other woman there with her. "I'm just not good with people."
"Excuse me shopkeep, but she's uncomfortable talking to you unless you two have a row together. Would you mind?" Misaki laughed but it died out when she was kissed. Her body became relaxed, and both hands found their way onto one of the soldier's arms to squeeze.
Chuckling softly, Kim merely nodded and held her lover close. The soldier had opened up to the officer, but she was still an introverted person, and even with Misaki, she didn't always wear her feelings on her sleeves. "I have no idea what I would have done without you."
It felt so wonderful to be held to Misaki in that moment, the blooming feeling of warmth spreading from her chest didn't register to her well. "Been very miserable?" The XO whispered, "Or in the middle..." She had a habit of trying to answer rhetorical questions that had always been there since her first assignment, something from the nurse she had spent the most time with off hours.
"Miserable." Kim whispered back, her own feelings fighting desperately with her fear and closed nature, but at the moment, it seemed a stalemate. "Just promise me you'll never leave me... I need you..." Too afraid to release her, the soldier squeezed Misaki gently closer to her, closing her eyes to prevent a tear from shedding.
"How can I do that? I'm going to stay right here with Hanako if I can, hopefully personnel stays kind." She didn't want to really upset Kim while they were so warm, so she pressed harder so the soldier would be forced to lay out, and she could rest on her, together. It felt even more close, with more weight to it after all. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it like that."
"Don't worry... I understand." While she kept her tone warm and understanding, she felt far from it. In fact, she felt cold and lonely, despite the fact that Misaki was now lying on top of her. Misaki valued her duty to Hanako more than her. Despite that, Kim still loved her, even if the love was not properly returned, so she did not wish to upset the officer.
The XO understood how upsetting it might be to Kim, and placed a light kiss at the soft shape of her chin. There was no way that she could explain what her loyalties to the family were, and Hanako herself to her lover without revealing the fact she was an NH-27. Telling her it was all the reward she could have wanted after bleeding across the galaxy for three years of the SMX war would just make her sound more pathetic, she was sure. "I don't think you do..but someday maybe."
"I don't care. I, I-I-I... l-lo-l... never mind... I shouldn't have fucking said anything..." Gently, oh so gently, the soldier lifted the officer off of her, and placed her down on the bunk. Kim rose from the bunk and went over to the outer bulkhead, where she proceeded to smash her forehead firmly into the wall. Idiot! Idiot! Of course she places her duty over you! Everyone would! The soldier was mentally cursing herself repeatedly with each movement of bringing her head to the bulkhead.
Left face-against the bunk, Misaki shifted and her eyes went wide once Kim started to beat herself. "Stop that!" She bolted forward using her gravity manipulation, and slipped both arms up and around the taller solider, pulling her back. "That's not-ah..what are you doing?!" It was alarming, even if she knew the redhead was holding back that wasn't enough for her to let her do that.
"What does it bloody look like? Doing what an idiot does best..." Kim muttered, simply staring down at her feet, blinking repeatedly as blood began to trickle down her forehead and into her eyes. "That's all I am."
"Well no doing this anymore." Misaki hugged the infantrywoman closer, a little painfully so hard. "You're not an idiot, what brought this on?" She was worried, very worried. It was harder than the officer thought. Did she make her so unstable? It wasn't what she meant to do. Tilting Kim's chin so she could see her face, the Nekovalkryja did what was natural to her and kissed at the blood, trying to prevent it from getting on her clothes and be a bit tender.
Muttering like a sulking child, all Kim replied with was: "Nothing." She couldn't manage to express her true feelings. She never could. No matter how much she desired to tell Misaki that she loved her, she could never find the words, nor the courage to tell her. And now she knew that Misaki cherished someone else higher than her.
"No, something did. I know it did...if it didn't I'd have to send you off. Tell me. Please?" She asked, taking smaller licks at the blood to clean Kim. It didn't taste horrible, just like her somehow. She felt that it might be what she always expected, and each time the redhead stuttered it sounded too much like, "I love you." For such a sharp woman not to understand in pattern.
"I... I... I just care for you..." Kim muttered. It was the closest she would get, without choking herself on her own words. Instead, she merely closed her eyes and sent a mental prod to Misaki, and opened her mind for her, allowing her to explore it however she wished.
Misaki tried to guild Kim back to the bed, and kissed at the side of her neck, though her lips were still dusted a bit with her lover's blood. "Lay down again first.." She whispered, acknowledging just what a private thing the other Neko was offering for her to do. It must have been important, almost confirming it for the young woman.
Nodding softly as she went to lie down on the bed as Misaki guided her. She maintained the link to Misaki, and kept her mind open for her, while her breath steadied somewhat. But now, she simply waited for the officer to continue, to explore it, to see it for herself.
In truth, Misaki had only practiced things of that nature in relation to her own brain functions, and some anti-interrogation tactics as well as penetration. So gingerly she engaged the link and started to make inquiries, staying away from anything that seemed guarded or not what she was there for. The officer's eyes slipped clothes, only her arm moving up and down the center of Kim's torso calmly.
Sighing softly, Kim simply lay limp on the bed, allowing Misaki's hand free access, just as she did in her mind, doing her best to allow Misaki free access to everything, most prominently her feelings towards Misaki.
Probing into that area of data, Misaki's body gave warmth to the confused woman. What exactly would she find? Normally society would indicate only certain people should attempt it, though honestly it felt like everything was happening so fast. Was it the right thing to do?
Breathing softly, Kim simply remained still in the bed, as if asleep, simply awaiting her lover to find that one single emotion that would explain everything. Whatever came later, the soldier would deal with. At least Misaki would know how she felt.
Misaki found it, but wasn't that surprised when she had. It confirmed her number one suspicion. A query went out, asking if she should check for anything else before withdrawing the link. Hugging Kim tighter, she placed a kiss in against her ear.
With only a gentle negative as a reply, Kim closed the link and her mind once more after Misaki had retreated from her mind. The soldier wrapped her arms against the other Neko, refusing to let her go. "Now... now you know..."
"I already kind of knew, Kim." Misaki whispered, letting the moment hang on that for a long time. There wasn't much else she could say, except for one thing that she was not sure about. It felt true to her, but saying it so soon after made her think that she would be doubted.
"Oh..." Was the only reply that came, and the soldier merely held her lover, not sure what to do. She did not tell her what she felt, nor did she reply in any other way. So naturally, Kim felt confused, and now, more scared than before. "Well, whatever you feel or want, I'll respect it... even if it means that you don't want to see me, ever again, because I truly do feel what you saw in my mind..."
"I would never do that, or say that." Misaki replied, resuming the slow rubbing with her spread hand. "I've never had this situation before, you're very...set on me aren't you Kim?" That voice was becoming nothing more than a whisper the more she tried to feel what would be the best thing to say to the upset woman she held. Saying what she wanted was a burden..or would be.
"I don't know. You know what I feel. I've never felt like this before... If I could explain it, or... whatever, I would." Kim's own voice was little more than a whisper in its own right, and while she would respect all of Misaki's desires and request, she still wished to hear the other woman return the sentiment.
"I know, I knew I guess really. You stammered so many times it got a little clearer. I love you too but..what does that mean?" Misaki finally whispered back, her hand had stopped about mid-stomach on Kim, and what still didn't occur to the woman was even to ask if the redhead expected her not to feel the same way about Hanako, or anyone else who brought out that side of her. The XO had never been a natural monogamist, certainly. Just like the majority of Nekovalkryja were not.
"What does that mean? It means that I love you, and that I would do anything for you." Kim whispered, her lips softly pressed against Misaki's cheek while she simply rested with the other Neko, quite happily with the soft intimacy, and the reassuring warmth of Misaki's mutual love inside her.
"Are you sure you're only a few months old...?" Misaki asked the other Nekovalkryja, when the root of the issue was their very different training and socialisation to that point. Being kissed made her soften some, forgetting the worries that bubbled up inside of her chest with pinpricks of emotion that could have stuck with her all the day. The fell one by one.
"Pretty sure. Unless someone forgot to download my memories the last time I was killed." Whispering still, Kim merely held the other Neko close, running a hand through her uniquely coloured hair softly. Right now, Kim didn't care. Misaki was there, and that was all that mattered to her at the moment.
"Nothing in your records indicated that..." Misaki replied, finding her eyes closed shortly after the touch came to her head. It was strange, something she actually didn't get much of...maybe others were intimidated to do such a thing to someone like her? A light purring faintly came from the officer, and her ears flicked whenever touched by accident.
"Well, then I must be only a few months old then..." As she noticed the flickering ears, the soldier couldn't resist leaning down to kiss them softly, all the while running her fingers through the soft hair. "And I don't care. I just know I'm here, and you're here."
That caused Misaki to shift in against and almost a little under Kim, making her part her lips wordlessly with the slight touches of pleasure each kiss gave. It would be more normally but she was so relaxed it was hard not to put each pleasant thing to the intimacy that she could. I know I'm here...I sure hope this is me or I'll be very mad when I wake up.
The redhead couldn't help but giggle softly at the mental message and simply continued her gentle worship of the officer's ears while she gently rubbed her back. You are here. I know you are. I wouldn't let you be anywhere else.
Oh, I thank you for the permission. Misaki sent back softly, whimpering little noises of her throat buried in purring. Eventually she controlled the twitching, and couldn't help but wonder what her feelings were going to do to her in the future. Both Kim, and her.
Smiling softly, Kim simply closed her eyes and relaxed with the woman she loved in her arms, quite happy to just sink into an eternal bliss just then and there, though her hand never stopped caressing the officer's hair.
Conscious thought slipped from Misaki's mind for a while, maybe somewhere short of thirty minutes, or it had only felt like a short time to her anyway. When she came back, she awoke and pushed her head into the faint presence of the same hand on her head as before. "K-im? Oh...I think I fell asleep. We should go report in. There might be something needed from me on the bridge and you could see who is doing maintenance on your armour. I don't want to get up, but..." Though, she did not mind going to see Hanako one bit.
"Mmfh? Oh... right... yeah." Kim mumbled, nodding groggily. In truth, the soldier had fallen asleep as well, and had only woken due to the officer's words, and she blinked sleep out of her eyes. "Can't skimp on duty, can we?" The redhead sounded cheerful as she gently untangled herself from the smaller Neko and slipped out of the bunk.
Misaki got up and patted at her hair to make sure it was still all right, then cued the hatch of their quarters to open. It slid open softly, the officer affording herself a long yawn first. Pecking Kim on the lips, she rubbed at an eye. "I guess I'm still tired from the mission. I'll be on the bridge." Passing through the lounge and out of the main hatch, the XO stepped down inside the bridge less than a minute later.
END
