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Saorstat Deoradh (Freespacers)

In addition to making them a bit more nomadic than organised, I've also added a questionable element that I'm not sure will be acceptable or not. The capturing of stray survey and scout ships for Nekovalkrja samples. The leadership caste performs experiments on these Neko in order to reverse engineer their nano and (some) genetic technologies, as well as collect information on the current state of affairs in the neighbouring Empire. I thought it'd make a plausible explanation for their eugenics despite being a nomadic race. And it would make a good storyline for someone to investigate these missing survey ships and Nekovalkyrja, possibly rescue them. And/or make first contact. I'm just unsure if having the Liberiex Mechanicus capturing and performing experiments on Nekovalkyrja would be considered going 'too far.' You might want to have a look, just incase it is.
 
It couldn't happen. The second you scan a Neko, it dissolves into untraceable hemosynthetic nothingness. A warrior Neko they'd probably never get your hands on -- either the Nekos would waste them, or they'd waste themselves.

Keep your race as separate from Yamatai as humanly possible. That's your best bet.
 
Hmm... They should add automated self-destruct to the abilities list. Didn't see anything like that in the CCG, so I know that little tidbit of information. Either that or I accidently missed it when reading about them. Oh well.

Since they should have no contact with the foreign races, I guess I'll have to re-work the profile again. My original idea was to have some sort of catalyst event, (ie, capture of scout ships, discovery of a foreign colony) something that would let them see they have a massive empire next door. That would cause a stirring among the race and scare them into setting their industrialization and eugenics program in motion. The increase activity, in turn, would perhaps catch the attention of their immediate neighbours. I suppose I could always change the catalyst to a more internal event, or simply leave them 'as is' (as just some shipdwellers floating about minding their own business until they are discovered). If anyone has any suggestions, let me know.
 
Ohhhhhhhhhh.

I would say that "capturing" a vessel isn't necessary ... you could, after all, follow a vessel back.
 
I don't think it's fully done. He kind of broached it here as a setting question, which was somewhat fair considering how it would change the setting.

But yeah, it could go in submissions now. Good point, Scribbles.
 
I think I've hammered out most of the SA universe conflicts. Thanks for the critique thus far, it helped a lot. I've also greatly downgraded the starship technologies quite a bit as Yangfan pointed out they were somewhat overpowered, though I put emphasis on advanced recycling and life support technologies to make the idea of a purely shipdwelling race more plasuable.

Please keep the critique coming so I can keep finding and fixing the faults! Or if you instead think it should stay as is, let me know.
 
It looks like you added some stuff too. But I thank you for trying to compromise with us on this.

I don't have any concrete objections for the moment.
 
BIG WALLS OF TEXT.

Doshii, I'm curious.

Where is the dissolving process in the race notes?

This would be a great deterrant to playing a Neko, knowing your character was disposable on such short notice.

This race is very very well thought out but I have something of a short attention span and I'm dyslexic so I find it very difficult to actually read it all which from my personal perspective makes them hard to grasp and somewhat pretentious whjch isn't true, since I'm making presumptions but there may be players who don't realize they're making these presumptions.

I'm not asking you change the race but could you also produce a summary or a shortened version? It's a bit difficult to assimimilate it all in one session unless I print it out and spend 45 minutes or so going through it.
 
I'm not one to normally be blunt or one to question those that run things, but I found that a pretty sad defense. Especially since If I were to mention someone using scanning as a weapon against them you would probably come up with a defense for that. Or at least I'd hope so. I wouldn't want to be playing one when someone comes along scanning and I turn into a puddle or something with the final words of "Blarg I'm dead"
 
I'm sure it's written in a newer Neko description, or mentioned somewhere on the forum, but I found this first.


Linky: https://stararmy.com/org/ketsurui/wicked ... -7_TM.html
 
Apparently, the NH-29A nekovalkyrja don't dissolve in pools of goo upon death. It's probably the case with the NH-27B and NH-12B too.
 
Hmm death by scan. THAT.....has got to be one of the coolest ways of being killed I have seen. Only to be topped by Death by computer scanner.
This form of death gets!

 
All the recent race threads made me recall my own creation from long ago, so overhauled the original and decided to bump the thread once again. Yes, it's long, I know. There are some of us that actually enjoy writing (gasp!), believe it or not.

The main reason for this bump is I want some opinions (before I forget about this thread again). The thing is, I'm not sure if they're similar enough to humans to count as part of the 'human but not' new race ban, which is why I'm uncertain whether to abandon the idea or continue working on it. I've noticed the SA Universe lacks nomadic or gypsyesqe races, but I'm not sure whether it's far enough 'outside the box' for it to even stand a chance at getting finalized. So give me your opinions!

Oh, and I still want criticisms. I don't let others proofread my work before I post it (hence the high number of edits) so this recent revamp might have a new wave of typos or conflicts.
 
I like the whole concept of a race with short life spans, since they seem very rare in SARP. The fact you also predicted the psychological impacts of such changes shows you put some good thought into this.

The whole polytheistic thing is cool too. Sort of druidism or paganism religion, but you've melded the spiritual and the technological aspects of the race. It's all very interesting.
 
To the life span, yeah, I've noticed more of the recent races have longer-than-average lifespans while few have short, so I wondered what it'd be like to have a race with a really short life span, and what the cultural effects would be. Thus the apatheic view on death and religious aspects.

As to the religion, most other religions in SARP are just plain monotheistic or crazed cults. I thought it'd be nice to bring back some good old fashioned paganism, complete with technodruids. Instead of being one with nature's spirits, why not being one with ships?
 
Approved!
 
Wow, didn't expect it to pass all of a sudden. I'd always assumed they went under the human-but-not ban. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. It's all good timing, since I've been itching to do another writing project the last week or two. Doing up some ships for these guys might keep me busy a while.
 
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