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Approved Submission Sky guard standard flight suit

Alex Hart

Alex Hart

FM of NDC
🎖️ Game Master
Submission Type: Uniform/clothing
Submission URL: https://wiki.stararmy.com/doku.php?id=faction:uso:skyguard:flight_suit

Faction: USO
FM Approved Yet? (Yes/No; Who, When) Yes
Faction requires art? (Yes/No) No

For Reviewers:
Contains Unapproved Sub-Articles? (Yes/No) no
Contains New art? (Yes/No) no
Previously Submitted? (Yes/No; explain reason if rejected) no

Notes: I wanted some skintight flight suits for the USO and sky guard.
 
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Rejected! Low quality submission - not enough detail, no art, header/text ratio, etc.

Also, don't put WIPs anywhere but the WIP folder.
 
I want to make this better for the next submission of it, so lets compare this to something like the origin armored pilot suit. Is it that it has too many headers? I wanted to include those to make it more clear, but I don't see how they detract from the quality. Also, I feel that I went in to a fair amount of detail for a simple flight suit.
 
Alex Hart said:
I want to make this better for the next submission of it, so lets compare this to something like the origin armored pilot suit. Is it that it has too many headers? I wanted to include those to make it more clear, but I don't see how they detract from the quality. Also, I feel that I went in to a fair amount of detail for a simple flight suit.
Click to expand...
Origin's was made eight years ago. Standards change.
 
I still feel that it went into a fair amount of detail for a flight suit. I could try to describe it better, but I'm no fashion designer and I don't think it would be very good.
 
@Alex Hart, you need to put text underneath every header. Also, I'd suggest adding details about the helmet's appearance: colors, what the visor looks like, any patterns or obvious antennae, etc.

When adding details, think about breaking each physical part down into its own compartmentalized description (in addition to what you already have).
 
I've made some changes, I'd like to know if you guys think its ready for resubmission, or what else needs to be added for it to be ready.
 
This looks better. Moved to submissions.
 
Ya still need a bit of text under "features," but if I were to use this tech as a player, it's much easier to get a vision of now than it was before.

All of the HUD color detailing is really helpful!
 
Where is is manufactured, and by whom (what manufacturer)?

Also, the "Features" section needs to be not empty.

If we could get some art that would be a major plus.
 
RPG-D RPGfix
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