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Approved Submission ST Data Fragmentation

Rizzo

Well-Known Member
Submission URL
https://stararmy.com/wiki/doku.php?id=stararmy:st_data_fragmentation
Submission Faction(s)
  1. Yamatai (except Elysia)
Submission Terms
  1. I agree
Hey @Wes, can I borrow 0.1% of all Neko?
I finished an idea from a long time ago that I’d really like to use. Is this something you would approve of?

For reviewers, I used a modified “drug template” for formatting as it was the best I could think of using at the time I started the article.
 

Syaoran

Staff Member
Submissions Reviewer
want to make sure I got this right, essentially this is an article for a 'disease' correct?
 

Syaoran

Staff Member
Submissions Reviewer
Okay looking this over there are a few things. The symptoms section, I think you need to make it more clear that this is not normal 'personality issues' cause that's kinda what it's coming off as, and it feels like it's saying that this is the cause of any 'personality disorder' any Neko has. I know that's not what it's trying to say though but others might not. Also under 'cure' and unborn child isn't an 'infant', I think it's technically considered a fetus even at the very late stages, but 'infant' is used post birth.
 

Rizzo

Well-Known Member
You’re right, I definitely need something special to make this stand out. I gave it a lot of thought and remembered the great plague that was all telepathically spread... don’t worry, I’m rebooting the plague!

I had an idea to make telepathy a more active part of it by adding a danger and dangling carrot by adding in some telepathic shenanigans that could be really powerful but also drive the character further into insanity and realistically increase the likelihood of hurting a loved one.

This is kinda just a twisted concept. @Wes, I would need to know your feelings on this before refining it to prevent abuse.
 

Syaoran

Staff Member
Submissions Reviewer
Well before Wes chimes in, you don't have to have something special. What I was trying to say was, the way the article is worded, it makes it seem like all personality disorders a neko has are from ST-Frag, and all personality disorders will lead to suicide. It's just the article needs to be a little more clear that the order of things is reversed, that this disease happens to be one of the causes of personality disorders, but not all personality disorders are ST-Frag.
 

Rizzo

Well-Known Member
Oh. Well I guess I understood that one wrong. I’ll see about wording that better too.
 

Syaoran

Staff Member
Submissions Reviewer
Okay looked this over again and did a grammar check as well. Honestly everything looks okay for this to be a 'disease' for ST type lifeforms.

[ ✅ ] 1. The destination URL should be a page in the appropriate namespace and titled lower_case_with_underscores
[ ✅ ] 2. The article is in the appropriate format and article template
[ ✅ ] 3. The article follows our wiki style guidelines, including: No forced line breaks, text after each section header, etc.
[ ✅ ] 4. The article is easily read and free of errors in spelling and grammar
[ ✅ ] 5. Links to other wiki articles are present as appropriate and are not broken
[ ✅ ] 6. The article fits into the Star Army universe's space opera theme and technology levels
[ ✅ ] 7. Images in the article are hosted on Star Army's wiki and sourced responsibly (contact Wes privately if there's a concern)
[ ✅ ] 8. The article is original and doesn't contain copy-pasted content from other articles.
[ ✅ ] 9. The article complies with Star Army's rules in terms of damage ratings, speed limits, etc.
[ ✅ ] 10. The Faction Manager(s), if applicable, have posted approval for this article in this thread.

So it gets APPROVED
 
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