ON: Hotel Room
"No, no, that is alright," Hanako objected, looking flushed. "Wait, were you asking me something?"
Shizu looked at the dossier of promotions sitting near her arm, again. After a few moments she opened it again. It might have been a stall for time, but after a few seconds she realized that the exasperated, half-mad feeling wasn't going to leave her. It was just going to have to be like this. Giving in to the inevitable, Shizu ran a hand through her hair, pushing it away from her face.
"Hanako-Taisa..." she began, knowing even as she spoke that the term was too familiar. It felt too familiar. Far too much. "When I came to this command, I was... overwhelmed. Thought I'd be unqualified, or fail. That it would ruin my career." Shizu's wandering gaze eventually found an ice bucket, with a bottle in it. It didn't matter what was in the bottle. She reached for it instinctively, as well as the glasses nearby, before she caught herself and looked back to Hanako. "Do you mind?"
"Hmm?" Hanako looked at the wine in surprise. "How did that get there? It must be one of those Ketsurui things. There are people out there who think of me as a princess. I have always been just a servant, though." It also occurred to her that the wine could have been a romantic gift from Misaki. "Please make sure there are not any cards or anything on it first." In the meantime, Hanako removed her red pistol belt and set it down on the floor. It sounded a little heavy; Hanako not only wore her NSP and communicator on it, but also a number of other small pouches containing things like hand sanitizer. Next, Hanako removed her gloves and boots.
Shizu took a brief look over the bucket, the glasses, and the bottle. There was a card, but it seemed to be more of a hotel courtesy than anything else. Someone must have known they were coming? Shizu didn't waste a lot of time thinking it over. Instead, she took the bottle, finding a corkscrew nearby, and broke it open. It was probably some sort of sherry or wine - it glittered redly when she poured it into the glasses. She poured two, out of courtesy, leaving the first within Hanako's easy reach. Then Shizu sat back and tasted it.
It was a sherry after all.
"I'm afraid my career's already over." She was exausted. It sounded in her voice. Exausted from the mission, exausted from the effort it had taken for her to drum up the will to bring the matter to the Captain's attention. "I mean... I'm not doing anything more than a Juni would. Why do you keep me, if you prefer Kurusu-Chusa as an executive?"
"What? I already told you that you are both my XOs," Hanako said, sounding frustrated. "This power struggle needs to cease." She took a sip of the wine. "I do not want to get rid of you Shizu...if..." Hanako let out a small hiccup. "The only direction your career will go is up."
Shizu raised an eyebrow, but didn't argue. She was still tasting the residual alcohol on the inside of her lips. It wasn't the sort of alcohol you could shoot - that was what she was used to. Instead, it was lighter. A lot lighter.
It was good alcohol, but Shizu stopped herself from tasting it again. Contrary to the impression she had given when she had first arrived on the ship, Shizu was quite used to alcohol, and knew her limits. Although there was a haze in the back of her mind, she was still thinking, and right now her brain told her that one officer in the room was already shot.
"I know it," she said quietly, "I just do not know how to fix it."
After a moment, though, the full sentance caught her.
"Up?" she added, questioningly. "I'm sorry, I do not see how that is possible at this point."
"If...hic!...If it continues to be a problem between you and Misaki I could transfer you without any discredit on you...label it as an administrative move, no negative effects," Hanako told Shizu. "To fix it you may just have to follow the chain of command by rank more closely. Misaki is a woman that takes pleasure in being served I think, probably more than serving. I wish you could appreciate her better qualities and vice versa. I also hope this whole conflict is not over jealously over a relationship."
Shizu blinked.
"I..." she said, before catching herself. What the...?
She knew instinctively that this conversation was about to take a downward spiral. If Kurusu-Chusa had been nearby, or in the room, Shizu would have taken the Captain's incoherance as a cue to leave. She very briefly had an image of the Chusa and the Taisa together, in bed. It was actually rather painful to imagine. 'Being served'. She shivered a little bit.
Rubbing at her eyes, dismissing the image, Shizu leaned forward in her chair and pushed her hair back again. What had she wormed herself into?
"I was thinking of requesting a transfer, actually." The Taii kept her fingers in her hair. She had caught a knot and it reminded her she needed to shower. The power armors were rather... organic, on the inside. "But in the end, I find myself wanting to stay."
Shizu carefully worked at the knot. It was something to do that didn't require looking at the Taisa.
"It's just... I disagree with her very strongly," she proceeded, "Just following orders is not why we became officers. We have to make decisions with other people in mind. A Hei can follow orders, but even a Shoi has to know why she's putting her soldiers on the line. That the risks she is asked to take are worthwhile. We owe them that much."
Hanako nodded sleepily in agreement, "I never asked or expected you to be anything but a leader," she told Shizu. She leaned back into the couch as she carefully removed her stockings, revealing smooth-skinned feet and legs and toes without nails or claws.
Shizu took another drink from her glass. It was about half-empty now. Definately half-empty. Half full would imply a more cheery outlook than she could drum up at the moment.
"So what do you expect of Kurusu-Chusa?" Shizu asked, knowing the answer would be something like, 'The same thing', but feeling inclined to ask anyway.
"I need her to take you seriously and start making an effort to treat you as part of the crew and not a robot soldier," Hanako answered, not entirely sure if she was saying what she was meaning to. "The ship...our needs of leadership but also teamwork. The best commander takes into account other views and ideas than her own." Hanako suddenly rose from the couch and began a wobbly trek into the bedroom section of the suite.
The Taii watched the Captain stumble for a moment. Had she really gotten that drunk, that quickly? Idly, the Taii took another sip from her own drink. Then she looked at the wristwatch she didn't have, and checked the clock on the wall once she realized. It was still early morning. She'd be getting up around this time.
The Taii set her drink down and followed the Taisa the couple of steps she had managed.
"You going to be alright, if I leave you here?"
Shizu found Hanako on the toilet. "I am peeing," Hanako stated the obvious, looking up at Shizu's eye. "I wish you could stay longer but...hic! I think I am about to fall asleep. Please at least give me a kiss."
Military service had quite desensitized Shizu to privacy. She crossed her arms and leaned on the doorframe. What a peculiar request, some part of her brain thought. Then, as if exasperated, the other half smacked the innocent idealist.
Semi-bemused, Shizu decided to indulge her curiousity.
"What, from me?" she asked, just as the doorbell rang.
Misaki hit the door chime again, sending another tone into the hotel room. She sighed, and rubbed one of her cheeks while shifting her weight again, something she'd been doing since she got there.
Hanako had not yet finished. "I am sorry...could you answer that?"
Shizu detached from the doorframe and, walking the few paces it took to bring her to the door, peeked through the peephole. After a few seconds of consideration, she opened the door and stepped to the side, rather than blocking it.
"Good morning, Kurusu-Chusa. We're almost through, I think."
"Good." Misaki said concisely, stepping inside. "I hope this doesn't become habit or I'll never get sleep or anything else for that matter." She managed a kind smile at the Taii, and squeezed her shoulder. The sangria had helped. A lot. "How are you feeling?" She asked, pulling off the shoes from the PT uniform to set them facing towards the door. After, she snapped the bikini bottom a little, adjusting it.
"Misaki!" Hanako's voice cooed excitedly from the bathroom.
The Taii resisted the urge to step aside when the Chusa reached for her shoulder. Shizu smelled like alcohol, sure - but now she could detect traces of it just about everywhere. It was just like a bar, except it was a hotel room.
Shizu gave the open portal some consideration. Did she want to leave? Yes. Yes, she wanted to leave. The relationship between Misaki and Hanako was no secret to anyone.
She kept on holding the door, closing it to a certain extent so it wasn't' completely open, debating.
Someone's as drunk as me at least...well I can put the Ketsurui stoicism to rest. The woman thought, placing a hand over her mouth to hide the smile that lept to her lips. "Yes, it's me!" She managed, but a bit of laughter got out at the end. Hanako had this habit of pulling Misaki from her dour feelings like it was the easiest thing in the world. It was one of the things she appreciated, but knew it was a bit selfish of her. "No? Yes?" The XO asked again, trying to get something other than staring from the tired Second Officer.
Hanako unsteadily emerged from the bathroom and bedroom a moment later. "I wanted to tell you that I was really, really scared," she blurted out as if there were no tension in the room at all.
"Yes," the ship's other Executive offered, smiling very faintly. Oh damn, Shizu thought, They're both drunk.
Shizu shut the door, more out of politeness. She'd find a way to step out when nobody was looking, perhaps, and when it wouldn't be considered rude. "They left some sort of sherry here, for you," the Taii said, nodding to the table where her own glass sat, mostly empty. "There's another couple of glasses."
"In the-ohhhh...yeah I was too, but really charged I can't help it. That's how they trained me..I was anxious too, then that led to. Ah..you know." The flower-haired officer blushed a little past the level the sangria had given her. Next came Kurusu's shirt, after all the top was a bikini anyway, and she felt like wearing one less thing with a Hinomoru slapped on it. Some of her ports showed, though, and she had to scrunch up her face a moment to fix things about her waist. Shizu could've guessed what she was by then, if she had noticed at all. Wandering from trying to make the Taii feel better, she moved to Hanako, and hugged her. "Hi! Sherry too? Drinks, then drinks..a real paarty."
"The ship is supposed to be our place in the universe where we can be safe. It is our mobile hiding place from the horrors of the universe where we can feel detached from the danger," Hanako attempted to articulate. "And the bugs were so creepy. I hate bugs, especially Mishhuvurthyar bugs. I was held captive once and they...they let bugs start eating my body. I thought I was about to die..." By now, Hanako was crying as she stumbled back to the couch.
The Taii very carefully took her seat back. She felt, suddenly, as if she were the sole viewer in the peculiar sort of drama that she was usually the center of. It was stunning how quickly the Captain's demeanor had changed, when Misaki had entered the room.
Shizu poured more wine, but not for herself. She refilled the Taisa's glass. She poured one for Misaki. She left her own glass mostly empty, taking it into a delicate hand, and sat, awkwardly.
Misaki blinked, and intercepted the hardly shorter woman to try and embrace her. "They're a plague on the universe. We'll stop them somehow, all of our sisters, and brothers together." It's true the males in Star Army weren't almost ever Nekovalkryja, but a solider was a soldier. She couldn't pretend it would be okay, that wasn't something Hanako would believe either, people were going to die, and she'd undergone something horrific but Misaki didn't ever hear a lot about it. Trying to guide the other officer down with her, content to have Hanako in her lap, or leaning against her, she ran a hand through her hair. "You're safe here.." She whispered. "I hate them too. We all do. There's a horde of drunk Nekovalkryja with sidearms between you and anything.."
Luckily, Hanako seemed to recover a little from the brief emotional outburst with Misaki's help. She kissed Misaki a few times and the went and recovered her wine and drank some more. "Do you ever feel like you have come so far that you do not know if you are yourself anymore? It feels like I have been...hic!...on a journey for so long and so many friends disappeared and I hope you two can stay."
"I /did/ give up command to stay. I"m here until you get sick of me or shoot me I'm afraid. I've never been as happy on any ship as I am here." Misaki admitted easily, looking better when she'd found Hanako eased after those few kisses. A hand slid up and down her back while she reached for the extra glass, pouring half of hers in Shizu's to be polite. "I remember the day we were hit hard. When I lost my leg? I don't think...even a third of the crew made it. Then we lost some after. Transfers..and-..well the last war feels like this strange ghost of a life to me. Real one moment and the next..well. I'm happy to be here." She repeated, quieting into a sip of the sherry. The glass went back down, her hand on her own leg closest to the other blue-haired woman.
Shizu crossed her legs. Then she crossed her idle arm over her stomach and held the glass, which Misaki had half-filled, up - watching the two of them quietly. She wasn't smiling, but she really didn't have to smile - people had told her that she had the sort of face that really didn't lend itself to that sort of thing. She at least managed a peaceful look.
A horde of drunk Nekovalkyrja, hu? Shizu bobbed a foot. It sounded a little funny.
"That's life," she offered, "One step at a time, where-ever you go, and you'll always get there. Isn't that what people say?"
Hanako looked up at Hamada's stern face. "People often just say or do whatever gives them an advantage. I do not want to be a fake person. Sometimes I wonder what I am doing out here and if maybe it would be easier on a farm. Just me and the dirt and the plants and the sun and rain. But then I think I would miss computers and people...and sometimes you just want to be cuddled. Have you ever been in love, Shizu?"
"I don't know. I don't like to trade aphorisms I'm only five years old." Misaki cooed with a more rich tone as the sherry coated her throat, and she put her chin over Hanako's shoulder, so she could still talk with her in her lap. The free hand she had helped curl with an arm around her waist. "Ohh...good question. I must hear this." Kurusu smiled even more, looking attentively at the green haired woman.
Shizu returned Hanako's look honestly for a few moments before looking down at her glass, thinking.
"No," she said. "Not as such."
"Happiness is a fast starship and a face buried in your cu...Hic!" Hanako sagely observed. "Every woman needs a lover."
"Okay that one is true but I thought the smart ones figured that out or went to a logistics ship." Kurusu giggled lightly, "They do..anyway we'll call that gunship rule one not an aphorism." She smiled, squeezing Hanako and eying Shizu for some sort of response. As much as she disliked the incident earlier, it was hard not to try and unpeel her a little, and see if she couldn't make her feel better.
Hanako felt warm and comfortable in Misaki's arms."Want to stay here for the night?" Hanako offered Shizu, wanting to share. She was determined not to have Shizu wander off into the night feeling slighted or lonely. Even drunk she realized that this situation was somewhat precarious and that Misaki's hold on her was a bit possessive.
The Taii flushed very slightly. This had gone far, far beyond the confines of professional interaction. Shizu resisted the urge to take the sherry like a shot. It would be too much sweet, too fast. It wasn't very strong alcohol, but it was still alcohol, and between the Nehi and the Sangria she was nudging the limit.
"Ah," she said, carefully, "You two seem rather content, at least. But I should probably get going. It's three in the morning, and although Kyoto never sleeps, they say..."
She tested her legs, standing. Yes. They did work, after all.
"Don't run," Hanako begged Shizu. She wanted to have the best of both worlds, to keep Misaki and Shizu as her closest friends. At the same time she wondered if she was doing something wrong. She briefly turned to Misaki for some sort of support.
"If you're sure. Sweet dreams." Misaki nodded once. She had more than she could have wanted, and was too warm to be very disagreeable. "I thought our conversation was getting fun, though." Came some moments later, after she hesitated in her mind on things. Why was she helping again? There were lots of things she had to do and they only had so many hours until they needed to 'be up' if they planned to. There was more to what Misaki felt for her, the words hadn't passed between either of them though, but she didn't want to dwell on the reasons then. She was simply enjoying herself.
Shizu sat her glass on the table and bowed slightly - more a bob of the head. They were all in uniform, but it was tough under circumstances to actually be professional, or think in a professional manner. So it was stupid. So what?
"Forgive me, please," she said, "I think tomorrow will probably be a little hectic. Do make sure to sleep, aye? Good morning, you two."
As she approached the door, Shizu heard the lingering nag in the back of her mind; Was this the way things really worked? And how long had it been, anyway? To be held, to hold. As much as she knew the relationship between the captain and her executive interrupted certain things - certain things that were important. It must have been nice, though, having someone to pass out on.
But it was the haze in the back of her mind talking, she knew. If she stayed, if she did take up the offer, it would... change things.
Or would it, after all?
Blissfully unaware of Shizu's interpreting Hanako's drunken desires as other things, Misaki smiled lightly at the Taii, sure she'd had one of those days she knew more than enough about. The vet kissed at the crook of Hanako's neck when the other Neko turned her back to go, and gave the woman in her arms another affectionate squeeze. Every time they were together she felt she couldn't be happier in the service, "Make sure to get there safely, Shizu-Taii." She called after. "At the very least we like to not pass out in public sight if we can help it." She was going to wait until the door closed for the other things an imperiled empire had stopped.
Hanako pouted as she watched Shizu avoid her. It hurt her, and the tears started again. She closed her eyes and lowered her head, feeling like a failure.
"What is it?" Misaki asked, sliding her lower arm up to rub Hanako's stomach, and the other ran through her hair again lightly with fingers spread evenly. "She's just giving us room, we barely even got to kiss before we had the alert from Nataria before. It was nice of her." The XO conceded, rubbing her cheek against the similarly sized officer's.
The door closed.
Shizu was on what the good, sane, logical part of her brain figured was the wrong side. The Taii put her forehead on the door. It was the very faint sob. She'd heard it. It was almost as if, for a moment, she had been dealing with a child. The way that the girl - when had the Taisa become a girl? - had clung on to Misaki. And cried. It was sad. It was pathetic.
She looked back. What sort of a starship was this? The Star Army didn't pay her to babysit.
"She always do this?" the Taii asked.
"Only when she's drunk. It's okay, get some sleep." Misaki nodded once, "And...don't mention it to others-well I don't think that I really need to tell you." The XO nodded, and kissed through Hanako's hair, her eyes more sharp after a few moments of the other woman's difficulties. "Sleep tight."
"Did you want to shower first?" Hanako asked Shizu, thinking Shizu was staying the night.
It was in that moment Misaki's purple eyes returned, communicating what she couldn't say aloud. It was more important to her than Shizu might have thought, it looked more like she was begging her to give them some space. She had to wonder too what Hanako thought of her then, after almost a year and a half of being together, things had progressed at some point but maybe it was only casual to her? Instantly, she felt like the galaxy's biggest fool. A knot tied in her stomach, and she looked back down again, kissing through Hanako's hair again, getting to her neck and stopping halfway down to perch her head on a shoulder once more.
"I am so sleepy," the Taisa commented, giving Misaki a kiss on the lips before freeing herself. Once up from the couch, she unsteadily dropped the rest of her clothing to the floor and wandered to the bed and crawled in, waiting for her girlfriend XO and her new friend XO to join her on either side. The cool softness of the pillow felt like heaven. She hoped she wouldn't barf on it.
The Taii looked from the Taisa, to the Chusa. Her eyes were questioning. They were, in a sense, professional rivals - two executives, on the same ship? And they had just fought a rather vicious verbal fencing match in front of the ship's entire crew compliment. Being in the same room was a miracle. Sleeping in the same bed? The Taii felt the Chusa's gaze very well.
Here, Shizu could hurt her. She was ashamed to find that was the first thought that jumped to mind, but it was what that gaze communicated - it was a plea. From the Chusa. From the person who had just dressed her down in front of an entire dozen enlisted. So this was the way it was going to be?
No; that's not the way it happens. Shizu knew her place, now. In the end, the rivalry didn't matter. Misaki kept the Taisa running.
"Nah," Shizu said quietly. She had returned to her peaceful look, and her voice was soothing - she made an effort, this time. Her gaze was knowing, rather than cold. "I would like to, but you must sleep, Hanako-Taisa. I will be around in the morning, I promise. Perhaps tomorrow we will find some civilian clothing, hm."
Shizu spared one last look at the Chusa.
'You're welcome,' she sent.
At that, Shizu grasp the knob, opened the door, and turned away.
It clicked closed quietly after her.
Thank you. Misaki sent back, feeling only a little less like a fool, and more like she owed Shizu a personal favour outside of the realm of the ship for what must have seemed a silly prize, sleeping with someone completely drunk out of their head. Once the click sounded, she passed out one last sigh. In truth, she didn't see a rivalry, but didn't want there to seem to be one for the woman she cared so much for after their year and a half together. It invited things they didn't need when the command of the ship was toppled over anyway, and left her feeling more worn out suddenly. Rising, she pulled her 'uniform' off by and by, sliding into bed with Hanako and tangling up with the more inebriated woman. "Dream in the stars with me." She whispered.
Hanako smiled as she drifted off into sleep.
