Re: Mission 1 Prologue - Strelgars attemp at dying.
By not letting his heart speed up he in himself caused it. It is just he desperately needed rest and with all that crushing force it would allow it. Call him suicidal, all wanted was to do something to kill the time. Time is all he had now, after losing the second person of his heart. He lived like a puppet, not really living at all just another zombie created from the bowels of hell.
Sleep was his time of zen and to revisit nightmares of his past, he needed to find a way to escape them. He couldn't handle the dreams, every time he fell asleep he always ended up in a different place.
The face of his mother first flashed before his eyes with the words, "there is always a battle fought in mans heart, love and hate." He could feel every sorrow being surfaced, it every day tore his fragile soul apart. Then there was Jecria, she looked so close to his mother it made him sob like an old man visiting happier times. Jecria his second and most treasured love, a woman barely twenty diagnosed with a curse to die. Lies, it was no curse, she was dying from leukemia a simple and deadly blood killing disease. She would become his second love and most beloved, of course she also died in his arms just like his mother. Strelgar laughed as tears streamed down his cheeks, in his memories.
He lost so much, and now he walked a corpse of false interest. Mock caring for life, call him suicidal. He tried to kill himself over and over again, charging madly into bullets. He lived with only a few wounds to his limbs, he cried. Then he found that bracer of his mothers the pain was erased, almost as if it was put into hiding.
Now he lay there his body forcing him to obey the laws of the world, his father would laugh at him for being so stupid.
His eyes slowly flinched he couldn't sleep in peace even in black outs. He carried one emotion now, sorrow he was a sin and is now reborn as was Nuos. He didn't want to move, stuck in that stupid half conscious fate. "Ah-" he wisped, everything was clear now. I seek death and death wont seek me, I am a damned soul. I-i can't believe it I am like Nuos my deity. He felt a tear roll down his cheek, his vision would remain blurry when he looked into the mirror. He had tears in his eyes, simply he was there an old relic of the past, I have my memories and that is all. He closed his eyes again, just letting time sleep away to engulf in his sorrow.
He knew now that he wasn't meant to remain in his body forever. Lets change my strength, lets evolve to become the next great emotion of battle. He fell to unconsciousness, his dreams ended as the choice was made. I will get strength to begin my lords work. He thought, as he lay there his mind racing, as he realized that these people were only puppets on the strings of something greater. Or this could all have been caused by his brains lack of oxygen for a few minutes.