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Quotes Quarantine

Not really SARP, but hilarious nonetheless.

[21] <Kai> yes, but Arcadia stormed off, and Fred sauntered off.
[21] <Pilot> Arcadia moved away from FRED like the damn lizard flu was his fault.
[21] <Kai> Arcadia didn't invite Emma, and Emma was mildly afraid of her because of ANGER issued.
[21] <Pilot> S'all.
[21] <StRockBand2> Fred is irish, the irish don't saunter, they parade
[21] <Kai> hahaha
[21] <Pilot> The IRISH MARCH to their damn alcohol!
[21] <CadetNewb> X-D
[21] <Pilot> LIKE HAPPY F***ING SOLDIERS, WAGING A WAR AGAINST SOBRIETY.
[21] <StRockBand2> lol!
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Exhack taking a dump in the IRC said:
<Exhack> Hnnngh.
<Faysm> Ex, are you sighing.. or taking a dump in the IRC?
<Exhack> 'Hnnngh.'
<Faysm> takes that as 'taking a dump in the IRC'.
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(2:18:26 PM) Stovaa: try to find out some stuff about the object of your affection
(2:18:52 PM) ***DragonNova thanks stovaa for summarizing what took her about 10 posts to say.
(2:18:58 PM) Jimmy: Yeah, watch her from the tree-line for a bit.
(2:19:05 PM) Blas left the room (quit: Read error: Connection reset by peer).
(2:19:17 PM) Blas [[email protected]] entered the room.
(2:19:22 PM) Stovaa: Hobbies, movies she likes etc
(2:19:49 PM) Stovaa: try to get SOMETHING you (or we) could use to get you somewhere
(2:20:05 PM) Jimmy: Where she lives, what time she comes home, wether there are any pets or other inhabitants that might get in the way.
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A comedian I saw once said something like this:

"If you're going to be a stalker, do it right. When you introduce yourself, don't say 'Hi, my name is ____, what's yours?' Be specific! Say 'Hi, my name is _____. Your name is ____, you are five-foot-four, one hundred twenty pounds, you dance to Duran Duran in the morning while getting ready for work, and always eat chef salad on Thursday nights, except when you had peppermint ice cream and Oreos the night you dumped your boyfriend three months ago. Are you free tomorrow night?' Then take her shocked silence as a maybe."
 
<CadetNewb> I don't like a fat projectile. Long and sleek is the way to go.
<CadetNewb> Sectional density and all.
<Kai> yeah
<CadetNewb> Though, a Neko will most likely work through the mild poisoning effects.
<Kai> so my .30 cal 4-inch rounds are good, yes?
<CadetNewb> Yeah.
<Kai> probably.
<Kai> but their armor will be trashed and useless.
* CadetNewb nods.
<Kai> HUHUHUHUHU~
<Kai> I need to go and find a gun format to steal now.
<Kai> or just find my normal one.
<CadetNewb> What would happen if the Mishhu approached Aerin to buy stuff?
<Kai> lots
<Kai> and
<Kai> lots
<Kai> of
<Kai> antimatter.
<Kai> =D
<Kai> that is the standard origin response to enemies.
<CadetNewb> Ah, so she's the baroness of war with a 5+ in morality. Good.
<Kai> XD
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[21] <Kyoki> It's like saying a nuke and a grenade are the same. Yes, both blow up, but they're fundamentally different
[21] <Kyoki> G'night Abwe
[21] <Rina> but you CAN have nuclear hand grenades.
[21] <Kyoki> ...................................
[21] <Zalus> Throw... Then RUUUNNNNNN!!!!!
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I love you, Zalus.
 
[00] <Itkatsu> What the hec is a 'holographic sound system'
[00] <Itkatsu> ?
[00] <Luca> Fictional, somewhere in the middle of the Mohs scale for Sci-Fi hardness
[00] <Itkatsu> It was an option on my Silvia
[00] <Luca> Sound System?
[00] <Itkatsu> Maybe it means 4-speaker
[00] <Luca> Probably
[00] <Itkatsu> It doesn't have it, either way
[00] <Luca> Where would you put SARP on the Mohs scale of Sci-Fi Hard?
[00] <Luca> 10 = Real Life, 0 = Warhammer 40K
[00] <Itkatsu> I'd put it at "batshit insane"
[00] <Luca> 3?
[00] <Itkatsu> What does W40k have that we don't, really?
[00] <Luca> Hmmh...
[00] <Luca> I don't see no inquisition, rather a lot of Spy Agencies
[00] <Luca> And unlike the I, the Spy agencies actually take a moment to think things through rather than getting the promethium when someone cries Heresy
[00] <Luca> 5 is somewhere where FTL is given a very hard-science justification
[00] <Luca> And probably 7 is how Uso would like it
[00] <Luca> Sci Fi is soft, hard, transparent or arcane. It's kinda like mud.
[00] <Luca> You can turn it into bricks or throw it at someone as is
[00] <Luca> You can dilute them, or make it real sticky-like.
[00] <Luca> Have I gone off course with this metaphor?
[00] <Itkatsu> idk, my brain is full of mush and Japanese engineering diagrams
[00] <Luca> It's full of Sci Fi
[00] <Luca> Sticky Sci Fi
[00] <Luca> I'll let you join the dots.
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<CadetNewb> And Neko are born sentient, yes?
<Kai[costuming]> yeah.
<CadetNewb> ok.
<Kai[costuming]> that's how origin is. Nice, yet functional. Standard yet luxurious.
<CadetNewb> Can they ride squirrels?
<Kai[costuming]> ...
<Kai[costuming]> what?
<CadetNewb> The younglings.
<CadetNewb> Can they?
<Kai[costuming]> I think they are too big.
<CadetNewb> Possum?
<Kai[costuming]> why the heck would they ride squirrels?
<Kai[costuming]> DUNNO!
<CadetNewb> Well, because it's funny!
<Kai[costuming]> geesh. you ask the strangest questions.
<CadetNewb> Well, a little girl of that size can't fantasize about having a pony quiet yet, so they gotta compromise!
<CadetNewb> Maybe raccoon.
<Kai[costuming]> ....
<Kai[costuming]> they only stay youngling size for a couple weeks.
<Kai[costuming]> at most.
<CadetNewb> Still enough time for that to happen.
<Kai[costuming]> you're crazy.
<CadetNewb> What?
<CadetNewb> It's cute....
<Kai[costuming]> .......
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<EmperorVader> And besides, my Vader is GREAT.
<EmperorVader> He has no suit.
<CadetNewb> ?
<CadetNewb> Oh right!
<CadetNewb> No lava burning.
<EmperorVader> He defeated Obi-Wan at Mustafar, thus no need for the suit.
<EmperorVader> And at the same time, he retains all the power that was lost in that fiasco.
<EmperorVader> Making him far more powerful.
<CadetNewb> So what does he wear now?
<Kai> a thing.
<Kai> *thong
<CadetNewb> I guess he could.....
<CadetNewb> OH GOD THAT"S SCARY!
<CadetNewb> Imagine being a rebel foot soldier, watching a man in a thong slice your friend in half, deflect blaster bolts and...OH GOD!
<EmperorVader> Yeah.
<Kai> hahaha
<EmperorVader> Really? Kill bill?
<Kai> "So, be honest, do I look good? Chivalrous you may be, I can still see your eyes, Javier." Sierra called him out, stretching her arms out to her sides as if to give the Nepleslian man a good look.
<Kai> /\ from a JP i'm doing =3
* Kai loves being mean with girls.
<CadetNewb> XD
<CadetNewb> Well, if Emperor Vader is feeling sadistic and bored, maybe he could....
<EmperorVader> He could...?
<CadetNewb> The thong.
<CadetNewb> After the Empire wins, I can imagine him struggling to explain that in his memoir.
<Kai> hahahaha
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[17] <Doshii> Yukari's trying to get fancy. I don't hold a lot of hope she'll survive, but hey, you gotta try.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> Yukari has plot armor.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> Don't worry.
[17] <Doshii> IIIIIIIIII doubt it.
[17] <Doshii> This is Matt we're talking about.
[17] <Doshii> He recognizes no plot armor.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> If Yukari died the plot would die. Even if it wasn't permanent.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> Yukari is that important.
[17] <Doshii> Oh, this is just a simulation.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> YUKARI'S FAILURE MEANS SITE FAILURe
[17] <Gamerofthegame> So no pressure.
[17] <Doshii> I sincerely doubt that.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> You do that a lot.
[17] <Doshii> Because I believe it's true.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> Tis why you are a journalist and not a construction worker in the Brazilian highlands.
[17] <Doshii> Mmmm. Cheap Brazilian transsexuals and firearms.
[17] <Gamerofthegame> Kamp's sort of place.
[17] <Doshii> Truth.
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[19] <Five> I got no complaints then
[19] <Five> Besides people like XXXX and XXXX and XXXX always being on the prowl for an arguement or a way to troll me, I'm pretty damn good with my position in SARP
[19] <OsakanOne> Everyone claims to know what I'm prowling for.
[19] <Kai> Latex?
[19] <Five> Traps?
[19] <OsakanOne> ...
[19] <OsakanOne> Okay.
[19] <OsakanOne> Everybody knows what I'm prowling for.
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Arsing About

Arse-ing About said:
[21] <Luca> Remember, if you were able to hand someone's arse to them, they didn't deserve it.
[22] <Luca> (that is, they didn't deserve their arse, since they weren't making good with it)
[22] <Jimmy> So we should keep the arse?
[22] <Itkatsu|Work> Nah, unless you want to have to wipe their arse for them
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Getting all the right signals said:
[21] <Lam> gotten any headway on your isp, Luca?
[21] * `Emma eats too much rice daily.
[21] <Luca> Plenty of it. Turns out the Antenna on my comp was buggered
[21] <Luca> Had it figgled with
[21] <Lam> got the gargle-blaster and the quantum super signal regulator replaced?
...
[21] <Luca> Yep. I had my antenna pointed 2 degrees to the wrong way
[21] <Luca> So I made a coathanger antenna'
[21] <Luca> I shaped it into a rude finger.
[21] <`Emma> haha pics or it didn't happen!
[21] <Luca> But then I remembered that my other antenna needed fixing so I bent that one about a hundred or so degrees to the right with a boot with a leg behind it.
[21] <Lam> second'd
[21] <Itkatsu> You need one of these ->> http://dl.getdropbox.com/u/727276/wifiantenna.jpg
[21] <Luca> But actually, the middle-finger coathanger I saw when I was on my way to a junkyard with my friend. Some dude had it as his car antenna
[21] <Luca> It was awesome.
[21] <Luca> Mmm, pie dish
[21] -->| Jimmy ([email protected]) has joined #StarArmy
[21] <Luca> Hey Jimbob, I fixed my comp.
[21] <Luca> http://dl.dropbox.com/u/727276/wifiantenna.jpg
[21] <Jimmy> You fixed your com-OHMYGOD!!
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You are hilariously fun to mess with, Jim.
 
<KampfHURRR> Anyone know why frogs are so happy?
<KampfHURRR> They eat whatever bugs them.
<Lin> I _hate_ you, Kampfer.
<KampfHURRR> What do frogs do with paper?
* Doshii laughs incredibly hard.
<KampfHURRR> They rip-it.
|<-- PlaidMage has left irc.sorcery.net (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
<Exhack> You aren't Ki-rin about your other problems. I had thought that you would most Asura-edly&O look things over.
<Lin> I _HATE_ you, Kampfer.
<Exhack> You aren't Ki-rin about your other problems. I had thought that you would most Asura-edly look things over.
<Lin> AAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.
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<Lin> THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX AND IF YOU WERE TO WRITE THE WORD HATE ON EVERY NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR YOU.
<KampfHURRR> Man, Lin, you sound a bit unhoppy. I guess these jokes are a tad polling on you. Maybe you should take a breather before you croak.
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